Great advice bumblebee. You have done your research, your information is on point. Also ladies, if you're doing your flowers or centerpieces yourselves, and your hometown has a flea market, you'll save a bundle by going there. So many different variety of flowers and they have bunches of 2 dozens for $5.00 a pack. You could appoint someone to go early the day of and you'll have your centerpieces made before you leave for the hair salon.
well I must admit we are almost at the $10,000 mark :( which we just KNEW we could do it for cheaper than that since we are not having a BIG wedding. but thankfully the only thing that will be going on cc will be our honeymoon to Jamaica
I can't believe you guys are so budget-conscious!! That's so good! Unfortunately, things in the UK are so expensive that it is almost impossible to have a wedding for under
We are now at $21,000 and FH is eyeballing me everytime I open my laptop. I cant go on a website without him throwing his questions at me a mile a minute, what website is that? what are you getting there? how much are you spending now? so on and so on. Must of the time im like calm down im only checking my email.
....I think that as long as you have no wedding debt afterwards...or if you do, something you can pay off in a few months rather than years (with proper planning), i think you are good, no matter how much you end up spending.....We spent more than we planned, but like I said earlier, we paid off the CC in a few months and that was only hotel fees.
Okay ladies we set a budget at 25k the place where were getting married has a 13000 mim but that includes the wedding reception all the food the appetizers for the cocktail hour and it has valet for the guests , it has a patoon boat that the wedding party can ride out on the river on and guess also if they like , it also has carriage rides that will transfer the guest from the wedding sit to the reception site.It is absoloutely grogeous out there.!!!! however i still have to pay for flowers, photographers, tranportation,my dress, his ring,cake, and favors.But ,with the help of my parents there paying for half of the ceremony and reception fee.so i think well make budget and we still have 17 months to go.
We are trying to stay under 10k also. So far I have bought 3 cases of bubbles for 5.99 and 200 frosted favor boxes for 6.99 on ebay. So I beleive we have saved a piece of change so far. I plan on going to this flower shop called Flowerama and buy some roses which are 9.99 a dozen. I just don't know how many I plan on using yet. My question is would it be more budget conscience to get a florist inside of a grocery store to do your flowers? Has anyone tried that?
I would do it only if that person is really a florist, and can afford to devote time to doing your flowers....Many of them are not really florists, but people with some experience in flowers, but no real certifications or proof of work. So ask a lot of questions because if they are an employee of that store they may not be able to devote extra time for it.
[quote="djimonsmom"]Right now we are at an estimated $8500. However, we have decided to do our own invitations and programs, and still finding ways to cut cost.
[/quote]
Be open to suggestion, and try to create certain things like centerpeices, bouquets now (if you're using silk) if you can....ALso, be open to the "untraditional" things too!
[quote="Bumblebeekee"]Right now we are at an estimated $8500. However, we have decided to do our own invitations and programs, and still finding ways to cut cost.
Be open to suggestion, and try to create certain things like centerpeices, bouquets now (if you're using silk) if you can....ALso, be open to the "untraditional" things too!
[/quote]
Would you believe that the budget cut came since i've been a member of this site. I would have never considered any DIY projects until I saw this site. So I am open to everything.
I'm amazed at what lengths people will go to and spend for a wedding. I, myself, am getting married 07/2008 and have a budget of well below 3,000 for the ceremony and reception and that includes the honeymoon AND photography. I think people get carried away and think they need to invite everyone and their mother, cousins and people that they don't know and spend extraordinary amounts of money. Funny thing is most of the people who are spending 10,000+ are people who really can't afford to, people who are still renting or living with relatives knowing full well that money could be used to purchase a first home or even (GASP)...pay down current debt. Why is it necessary to spend 20,000 on a one day event? I think a lot of brides get caught up and spend money that they don't have. My fiancee and I are fortunate to have a house, great careers and a comfortable life. The both of us really don't feel the need to go into debt to cater to people on a one day event. Inexpensive doesn't mean ghetto or can't afford-sometimes it could very well mean that you're spending wisely and still having a special day. Learn to do your research, tap people you may know to do you a favor. Because at the end of the day, yeah you'll be married but at what expense? And newly married and in debt is not the way to start a new life.
Just food for thought.
Secondly, I agree with you. FI and I delayed the wedding to have our home built last year. Before that we spent 13 months paying off all our debt besides our student loans and saving a nice chunk for a down payment on the home. Now we are paying for our wedding in cash. We still contribute the same amount to our savings and cut our budget elsewhere, especially our discretionary spending. We both come from very large tight-knit families - not the kind that only see eachother on holidays if that. Even still we set our guest count at 200, found a venue that will allow us to bring in our own food, mom and friend's mom are catering, DIY several projects, and like you mentioned, tapping into our resources!
While I couldn't do < $3k total including honeymoon and photography, its looking like the intial $10k budget is getting down to less than $7500!
Thanks for the welcome. Don't get me wrong-different strokes for different folks. Sounds like you're being smart about planning your big day. So your budget sounds great especially if you have your other ducks in a row and not gonna drown later. After my fiancee and I decided that we were headed down the aisle-as funny as this sounds I started schooling myself by watching Platinum Weddings and Whose Wedding is it Anyway and any other wedding show. I started looking at how ridiculous some of these wedding budgets were...couple of them were ONE MILLION DOLLARS!By watching these shows it taught me a number of things:
1. BE REALISTIC
2. Learn to tap resources.
3. Learn to DIY
4. Don't be afraid to negotiate
5. possibly share the resources with another bride at the same venue-one way to cut costs.
6. DON"T BE AFRAID TO SAVE MONEY FOR MORE IMPORTANT THINGS
I've always been resourceful and a serious DIY'er. I've worked in printing, television, real estate, non-profit and know a number of people in these fields and in others (catering, photography-just to name a few). One of the best things that I'm doing so far is buying things in cash NOW so when prime wedding time (Spring-Summer) comes around I won't be caught out there paying more than I have to.
My favors I'm buying a case and personalizing them myself (for each couple-so each one will be unique and one of a kind).
Another thing people have to keep in mind where a lot of folks run into trouble is don't feel you have to invite EVERYONE. In my case we're having a private ceremony with family and literally 5 close friends. For the reception-everyone is welcome. That cut out a lot of cost alone. Second, we decided not to have bridesmaids and groomsmen because:
1. someone was GUARANTEED to get their feelings hurt-never fails....
2. everyone is all over the place-logistical nightmare for fittings
3. Don't wanna deal with the drama-PERIOD
I found a website where I can buy my flowers direct-HUGE SAVINGS
My wedding dress, I went with a dress that only cost 105, Looks like a wedding dress, I can wear it again-if I choose and it was made by a designer that makes bridesmaids and brides dresses-courtesy of Nordstroms.com.
Why spend gobs of dough on a dress that you'll never wear again or have the hassle of trying to EBAY it or save it for your daughter who may tell you she doesn't want your raggedy dress or too big or too small to fit it....wasted money.
Ladies don't go broke trying to keep up with the Joneses.
[quote="FFKitten"]Ladies don't go broke trying to keep up with the Joneses.[/quote]
LOL! Funny you should say that. That's my future last name, hence my handle!
Those are some good tips to remember. What site are you using for your flowers? I want calla lillies. My dad's friend is a florist and while she won't do my arrangements for free (dang player daddy) she said she'd help my MOH and I do some trials. My reception is what is costing me the most. The ceremony is almost free (besides our attire and decor items). Also, where are you going for your HM? Definitely looking for a deal there! Any suggestions?
Welcome FFKitten.
I agree with you on not going broke.
I think that if you can afford to splurge without going broke or not have to pay it off months and months after the wedding, I think you should go forth! We spent 10,000 for everything, and after the wedding, we paid off the hotel stay the following month because we put it on our credit card....I think its awesome that you only will spend 3000.00 on your wedding....Cause thats what you want....
After being with the vibrides, i initially felt that many were spending so much money on their weddings, and then I learned that they were getting what their hearts desired....Plus, many of them have the blessing and benefit of parents who have saved their $$ to give them tens of thousands or more...or less to help with the wedding.....And being someone who paid for everything ourselves, I will do everything so that my future kids won't have to spend a red cent if they don't have to! But I cannot blame them or their families for that...As long as spending is wise! Whether you are a homeowner or not!
I agree, while it seems that amongst some I have one of the larger budgets, I was blessed that my parents are paying for the entire day. So while they are paying for the wedding, my FH and I just payed off my car note and are putting away towards the downpayment on a house.
I agree you should be wise about what you spend, you should also make your day everything you ever wanted it to be because (ideally) you are only gonna do it one time. There are ways to get what you want without breaking the bank, people make sacrifices in areas that some wouldn't make. For example some people don't care if many people come and some folks want everybody in their lives to be there. Or some people would spend multiple thousands on a dress but have no flowers or a small cake.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that we make concessions and sacrifices based on what is important to us, but if you don't have to make sacrifices, then why not make it all you want it to be.
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
[quote="IvyPrincess"]I agree, while it seems that amongst some I have one of the larger budgets, I was blessed that my parents are paying for the entire day. So while they are paying for the wedding, my FH and I just payed off my car note and are putting away towards the downpayment on a house.
I agree you should be wise about what you spend, you should also make your day everything you ever wanted it to be because (ideally) you are only gonna do it one time. There are ways to get what you want without breaking the bank, people make sacrifices in areas that some wouldn't make. For example some people don't care if many people come and some folks want everybody in their lives to be there. Or some people would spend multiple thousands on a dress but have no flowers or a small cake.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that we make concessions and sacrifices based on what is important to us, but if you don't have to make sacrifices, then why not make it all you want it to be.
[/quote]
Welcome FFKitten. I think it's great that you are able to have the wedding you want for under $3000. I DIY'd practically everything for my wedding, tapped into friends for things, bought things off season and still ended up spending much much more than $10,000. Since we already have a home and were able to pay cash for everything we feel good about our choices. Although we did spend alot, we didn't spend nearly as much as our guests thought we had which is a reflection I think of our creativity and wise spending. While it's true we could have used the money to pay down our current debt(mortgage & student loans), we didn't acquire any new debt. Absolutely no regrets here.
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
First off, welcome to the board FF kitten. I have to say when it comes to wedding budgets, it's definitely a matter that ultimately must be decided by the couple based on what can be afforded without going into debt. Just because someone chooses to spend more than $3k does not mean they are spending foolishly or attempting to keep up with the Joneses. Our wedding and reception overall ended up being $25k, which we paid for ourselves in cash over the course of 10 months leading up to the wedding day, and without owing one red cent after the wedding day. In addition, DH's parents footed bill for honeymoon and rehearsal dinner. We are already homeowners, live a very comfortable lifestyle, both have stable, excellent-paying careers, still have a healthy savings, are not in debt and do not in any way regret anything about the wedding day, including the amount we spent. It was everything we ever dreamed of. I agree that folks shouldn't go in debt over one day, but everyone who spends what some would consider to be a lot for a wedding isn't in debt. Just my 2 cents.
I hear ya'll! We are not homeowners-yet we spent 10K. We could buy a house if we wanted to right now because both our credit is good. My DH alone can be approved for over 200 K for a home loan with his great credit....however, we are just starting out careerwise, and decided that with our entry-level incomes, we want to be able to pay less than 45% towards housing fees such as mortgage, taxes, insurance, emergencies and the like, and income-wise we are just not there YET! Plus I just got out of grad school, and my student loan debt is ridiculous! I don't have to pay on it until March...AND I am planning to get a PhD! That being said, I think we made a conscious decision not to buy a home right now, but with the 10K spent in cash, we didn't add any debt either! We are still getting our eggs in a row...and truthfully, if we could have afforded it, we would have spent even more cash to have our dream wedding....Actually, we could have spent more because we saved so much money initially with the DIY, change in location, and my church not charging us a red cent! (plus the extra savings with only 100 of the 150 people coming to the wedding reception!) Shoot we even came out so much in the black with all the cash we got in gifts/along with gifts...we spent some on the honeymoon and was still able to put 2000.00 in the savings account...which by the way is still there untouched, plus some....and we got a brand new car (no note, no insurance) as a present too! So God was good all around (still is!).
Thanks everyone who has welcomed me so far. I'm glad ya'll didn't scratch my eyes out! LOL
Like I mentioned before, everybody situation varies greatly from one another so whether you choose to spend 10 grand or 1 million as long as you're not doing it for the wrong reasons and not gonna drown in debt and you're good after the fact, FANTASTIC. And if you have parents that are paying the cost GREAT, as long as they too aren't taking out second, third and fourth mortgage's to out do Hatti Mae's daughter's grandchild's wedding. LOL As a woman of color, I think it's especially important to set a precedent when it comes to SAVING and spending. A lot of people aren't taught from a young age the importance and value of money and while a wedding is a beautiful occassion, some women negate their priorities and responsibilities that cost them BIG in the long run. Money is one of the number one factor(s) that cause stress in a marriage. I love to see couples of color marry and have a GOOD marriage-which are like a dime a dozen nowadays. Everybody got their "wifey's" and "baby daddy."
I'm personally tired of watching BET and seeing debt commercials rotating heavy on there.
Future: We're going to Aruba for our HM. I used my airline miles to secure the tickets and if you let the hotel know it's your honeymoon a lot of times they'll discount and have honeymoon gifts to throw in-so don't sleep on finding out what they can do for YOU wherever you decide to HM cause you're giving THEM business and it's in their interest to do you a solid.
See FFKitten....you fit right on in because all in all, you are using your skills and deals to make your wedding cost effective! And that thing about taking out 2nd, 3rd, and 4th mortgages is a mess! Too funny! But sad to say, people do it all the time...I'd hate to know my parents had did that for me...I wouldn't let them....but yep you're right about the need to save $$! We are in living in the days of the need to build wealth and savings!
I guess thats why we're waiting to buy a house....we live in a $500.00/month 1 bedroom apartment, and I don't think we'd qualify for a mortgage less than that...and our expenses with bills are about 1500.00, cause he's paying his student loan, and a couple of credit cards off (he pays 200.00+/month per card....-Hubby has a couple of cards with no limit, and even a black card that he never uses).Then 500.00/month goes in the savings so we are on our way....Its hard because in order to do that somebody (i.e: ME) had to stop shopping...but its a worthy cause....I am needing to be homeowners like my vibride sistah's here.
We didn't want to have a big wedding and had a budget of $5000 but after the wedding we only paid out $7316.00. We found someone who made arrangements with artificial flowers and our decorations where very simple. It helped that I had a wedding planner because she kept me within my budget. You will be amazed how much you can find at the dollar store and don't be afraid to ask people. My mother collects wine glasses and we had enough for the head table and parent table. My wedding planner did my save the dates, invitations, programs, menu cards on a laptop and home printer. We bought the paper and cardstock at Office Depot. You couldn't even tell. She was worth $700. We had so many complimants on how intimate and elegant our wedding was. That's what I wanted.
[quote="YVELYNNE1"]We didn't want to have a big wedding and had a budget of $5000 but after the wedding we only paid out $7316.00. We found someone who made arrangements with artificial flowers and our decorations where very simple. It helped that I had a wedding planner because she kept me within my budget. You will be amazed how much you can find at the dollar store and don't be afraid to ask people. My mother collects wine glasses and we had enough for the head table and parent table. My wedding planner did my save the dates, invitations, programs, menu cards on a laptop and home printer. We bought the paper and cardstock at Office Depot. You couldn't even tell. She was worth $700. We had so many complimants on how intimate and elegant our wedding was. That's what I wanted.
[/quote]
Congrats on your wedding. It seemed to be very cost effective too! I agree, a good wedding planner is worth the splurge! Especially if the result is still an elegant and timely affair....
We started on a $15,000 budget. With the help of my Vibride sisters and DIY projects that I'm doing myself, with the help of my bridal party, of course, we've been able to reduce that budget to $10,000 and it looks like it's going to work out. So far so good. I'm still trying to find ways in which I could save a few bucks here and there so it's a work in progress for us that will not exceed $10,000
Right now I'm a little over 6,000. I am still not finished yet, I have yet to get my dress, rings, favors, & flowers. So I already know that my total will be somewhere between 8,000-9,000. I can't wait to keep all my money!!! (LOL!)
ooh im rite here pam.. hope im not late lol , well with me ill be having two weddingsin sa and in us , soo our bugdets for each wedidng is set for 12k each , but sister genoue has been a great help in helping me reduce mine im now down to 11k for my sa wedding since its the first one im still hoping to reduce it to atleast 10k i been doing alot of reasearches and comparing prices soo i hope ill be able to nail it .plus i got a lot of crafty people back home that will behelping me in DIY 'S that shud save a couple of $$$ too .
Our cake topper was our very first purchase for the wedding. I'm ashamed to say that I paid almost $50 for it and the damn thing is huge! But I'll still use it.
- 100 Invitations * $21 from Target. They were on clearance and the sales lady didn't ring up one of the boxes.
- Reception * $1300 We had to give up a beautiful garden venue
for this community center with a large yard.
We saved a little over a grand, so it was worth it.
- Dress *$325 It's still a bit pricey for me since it's a knee length dress, but I like it. The lace work is beautiful. It was a good thing that I bought it when I did..the dress has been discontinued.
- Veil and Tiara *$80
Heres the tiara in my naps. I'm pretty proud of this purchase. The tiara was priced at $70 and the veil had a $170 ticket. The whole thing was a hook-up from the sales lady.
I've got some lbs to lose. hehe
- DJ * $800 We haven't booked him yet. I like that he specializes in Neo-soul and old school music along with hip-hop.
- Photographer * $800 I'm opting for the CD only packaging. I think that we can manage making our own albums.
- Cake *$325 We are using a bakery we use often. We have already paid them for their specialty white chocolate and strawberry champagne cake for 125 people. I got a 20% discount for booking so early.
- Flowers *$150 I had used one of those Ebay merchants who constructed bouquets from silk arrangements. It was a 21 piece deal. They will do and they are photogenic.
- Centerpieces *18 for roughly $400 I DIYed my centerpieces. I think that they look okay.
- Three bridesmaid dresses -*All together $204*
- Shotglass wedding favor - *109 for $143 I was told that using shotglasses as wedding favors is tacky, but I couldn't resist! DiscountMugs.com threw in 15 more than I had originally asked along with a 20% discount.
I think they are so cute, and I'm not a drinker except for the occasional c0cktail and chardonnay. I just happen to like souvenier shotglasses. Mine is green and has a different font and picture on it. I love it.
That brings my total so far to an estimated $4643.
We still have to book our transportation, officiant, guitarist or saxaphonist for the ceremony, caterer *we are using a restaurant that caters off-site and I refuse to go over $2000*, and Tables/chairs/linen rentals. If I decide to splurge, I will hire breakdancers for entertainment of the evening.
I love your cake topper. We almost chose that one ourselves until I came across the gazebo cake topper and fell in love and had to get a bride and groom to go underneath.
It's amaaazing how much wedding viels can cost. I was like "Whoa!" But everything is a keepsake and can be preserved for future use.
Anyway, everything looks beautiful. Planning is so much fun, isn't it? And don't worry about your weight. You look beautiful, sistah!
Depending on where you live, that shouldn't be a problem. I'm lucky to be living in Dallas rather than somewhere in New York where brides are hopelessly being gouged by vendors.
I find some high budgeted weddings not to be that much different than ones with a lower budget. So far, I am saving money by not going to vendors that specialize in weddings as much as I possibly can. I've saved nearly 1,500 by having my wedding at a community center rather than a place that is already set up for weddings. This place allows me to bring in my own catering, liquor, etc. The only problem I face is that I don't want to mention that my place is a community center on my invites. Instead of writing in the place's full name, "Springpark Recreation and Sports Center", I'll just write in "Springpark Center".
Since my venue allows me the freedom of using my own vendors instead of their contracted people, I can save even more money by using a restaurant that caters off-site. My sister complains that this place serves boring food, but Luby's Cafeteria offers their services for around $10 per person.
Great advice bumblebee. You have done your research, your information is on point. Also ladies, if you're doing your flowers or centerpieces yourselves, and your hometown has a flea market, you'll save a bundle by going there. So many different variety of flowers and they have bunches of 2 dozens for $5.00 a pack. You could appoint someone to go early the day of and you'll have your centerpieces made before you leave for the hair salon.
BUMP!
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well I must admit we are almost at the $10,000 mark :( which we just KNEW we could do it for cheaper than that since we are not having a BIG wedding. but thankfully the only thing that will be going on cc will be our honeymoon to Jamaica
I can't believe you guys are so budget-conscious!! That's so good! Unfortunately, things in the UK are so expensive that it is almost impossible to have a wedding for under
We are now at $21,000 and FH is eyeballing me everytime I open my laptop. I cant go on a website without him throwing his questions at me a mile a minute, what website is that? what are you getting there? how much are you spending now? so on and so on. Must of the time im like calm down im only checking my email.
We're trying to stay under $10k and so far so good!
....I think that as long as you have no wedding debt afterwards...or if you do, something you can pay off in a few months rather than years (with proper planning), i think you are good, no matter how much you end up spending.....We spent more than we planned, but like I said earlier, we paid off the CC in a few months and that was only hotel fees.
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Okay ladies we set a budget at 25k the place where were getting married has a 13000 mim but that includes the wedding reception all the food the appetizers for the cocktail hour and it has valet for the guests , it has a patoon boat that the wedding party can ride out on the river on and guess also if they like , it also has carriage rides that will transfer the guest from the wedding sit to the reception site.It is absoloutely grogeous out there.!!!! however i still have to pay for flowers, photographers, tranportation,my dress, his ring,cake, and favors.But ,with the help of my parents there paying for half of the ceremony and reception fee.so i think well make budget and we still have 17 months to go.
"WHAT GOD HAS FOR ME,It is for me!
June 20,2009 Ill marry my soulmate!
We are trying to stay under 10k also. So far I have bought 3 cases of bubbles for 5.99 and 200 frosted favor boxes for 6.99 on ebay. So I beleive we have saved a piece of change so far. I plan on going to this flower shop called Flowerama and buy some roses which are 9.99 a dozen. I just don't know how many I plan on using yet. My question is would it be more budget conscience to get a florist inside of a grocery store to do your flowers? Has anyone tried that?
Nope , Ive never tryed the grocery store shop around and see what u come uo with.
"WHAT GOD HAS FOR ME,It is for me!
June 20,2009 Ill marry my soulmate!
I would do it only if that person is really a florist, and can afford to devote time to doing your flowers....Many of them are not really florists, but people with some experience in flowers, but no real certifications or proof of work. So ask a lot of questions because if they are an employee of that store they may not be able to devote extra time for it.
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Right now we are at an estimated $8500. However, we have decided to do our own invitations and programs, and still finding ways to cut cost.
Striving for better than my Best!!!
[quote="djimonsmom"]Right now we are at an estimated $8500. However, we have decided to do our own invitations and programs, and still finding ways to cut cost.
[/quote]
Be open to suggestion, and try to create certain things like centerpeices, bouquets now (if you're using silk) if you can....ALso, be open to the "untraditional" things too!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
Mine is $15,000 as of now and hopefully we will come in under that.
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
[quote="Bumblebeekee"]Right now we are at an estimated $8500. However, we have decided to do our own invitations and programs, and still finding ways to cut cost.
Be open to suggestion, and try to create certain things like centerpeices, bouquets now (if you're using silk) if you can....ALso, be open to the "untraditional" things too!
[/quote]
Would you believe that the budget cut came since i've been a member of this site. I would have never considered any DIY projects until I saw this site. So I am open to everything.
Striving for better than my Best!!!
I'm amazed at what lengths people will go to and spend for a wedding. I, myself, am getting married 07/2008 and have a budget of well below 3,000 for the ceremony and reception and that includes the honeymoon AND photography. I think people get carried away and think they need to invite everyone and their mother, cousins and people that they don't know and spend extraordinary amounts of money. Funny thing is most of the people who are spending 10,000+ are people who really can't afford to, people who are still renting or living with relatives knowing full well that money could be used to purchase a first home or even (GASP)...pay down current debt. Why is it necessary to spend 20,000 on a one day event? I think a lot of brides get caught up and spend money that they don't have. My fiancee and I are fortunate to have a house, great careers and a comfortable life. The both of us really don't feel the need to go into debt to cater to people on a one day event. Inexpensive doesn't mean ghetto or can't afford-sometimes it could very well mean that you're spending wisely and still having a special day. Learn to do your research, tap people you may know to do you a favor. Because at the end of the day, yeah you'll be married but at what expense? And newly married and in debt is not the way to start a new life.
Just food for thought.
First of all - Wlecome to the board FFKitten!
Secondly, I agree with you. FI and I delayed the wedding to have our home built last year. Before that we spent 13 months paying off all our debt besides our student loans and saving a nice chunk for a down payment on the home. Now we are paying for our wedding in cash. We still contribute the same amount to our savings and cut our budget elsewhere, especially our discretionary spending. We both come from very large tight-knit families - not the kind that only see eachother on holidays if that. Even still we set our guest count at 200, found a venue that will allow us to bring in our own food, mom and friend's mom are catering, DIY several projects, and like you mentioned, tapping into our resources!
While I couldn't do < $3k total including honeymoon and photography, its looking like the intial $10k budget is getting down to less than $7500!
Thanks for the welcome. Don't get me wrong-different strokes for different folks. Sounds like you're being smart about planning your big day. So your budget sounds great especially if you have your other ducks in a row and not gonna drown later. After my fiancee and I decided that we were headed down the aisle-as funny as this sounds I started schooling myself by watching Platinum Weddings and Whose Wedding is it Anyway and any other wedding show. I started looking at how ridiculous some of these wedding budgets were...couple of them were ONE MILLION DOLLARS!By watching these shows it taught me a number of things:
1. BE REALISTIC
2. Learn to tap resources.
3. Learn to DIY
4. Don't be afraid to negotiate
5. possibly share the resources with another bride at the same venue-one way to cut costs.
6. DON"T BE AFRAID TO SAVE MONEY FOR MORE IMPORTANT THINGS
I've always been resourceful and a serious DIY'er. I've worked in printing, television, real estate, non-profit and know a number of people in these fields and in others (catering, photography-just to name a few). One of the best things that I'm doing so far is buying things in cash NOW so when prime wedding time (Spring-Summer) comes around I won't be caught out there paying more than I have to.
My favors I'm buying a case and personalizing them myself (for each couple-so each one will be unique and one of a kind).
Another thing people have to keep in mind where a lot of folks run into trouble is don't feel you have to invite EVERYONE. In my case we're having a private ceremony with family and literally 5 close friends. For the reception-everyone is welcome. That cut out a lot of cost alone. Second, we decided not to have bridesmaids and groomsmen because:
1. someone was GUARANTEED to get their feelings hurt-never fails....
2. everyone is all over the place-logistical nightmare for fittings
3. Don't wanna deal with the drama-PERIOD
I found a website where I can buy my flowers direct-HUGE SAVINGS
My wedding dress, I went with a dress that only cost 105, Looks like a wedding dress, I can wear it again-if I choose and it was made by a designer that makes bridesmaids and brides dresses-courtesy of Nordstroms.com.
Why spend gobs of dough on a dress that you'll never wear again or have the hassle of trying to EBAY it or save it for your daughter who may tell you she doesn't want your raggedy dress or too big or too small to fit it....wasted money.
Ladies don't go broke trying to keep up with the Joneses.
[quote="FFKitten"]Ladies don't go broke trying to keep up with the Joneses.[/quote]
LOL! Funny you should say that. That's my future last name, hence my handle!
Those are some good tips to remember. What site are you using for your flowers? I want calla lillies. My dad's friend is a florist and while she won't do my arrangements for free (dang player daddy) she said she'd help my MOH and I do some trials. My reception is what is costing me the most. The ceremony is almost free (besides our attire and decor items). Also, where are you going for your HM? Definitely looking for a deal there! Any suggestions?
Welcome FFKitten.
I agree with you on not going broke.
I think that if you can afford to splurge without going broke or not have to pay it off months and months after the wedding, I think you should go forth! We spent 10,000 for everything, and after the wedding, we paid off the hotel stay the following month because we put it on our credit card....I think its awesome that you only will spend 3000.00 on your wedding....Cause thats what you want....
After being with the vibrides, i initially felt that many were spending so much money on their weddings, and then I learned that they were getting what their hearts desired....Plus, many of them have the blessing and benefit of parents who have saved their $$ to give them tens of thousands or more...or less to help with the wedding.....And being someone who paid for everything ourselves, I will do everything so that my future kids won't have to spend a red cent if they don't have to! But I cannot blame them or their families for that...As long as spending is wise! Whether you are a homeowner or not!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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I agree, while it seems that amongst some I have one of the larger budgets, I was blessed that my parents are paying for the entire day. So while they are paying for the wedding, my FH and I just payed off my car note and are putting away towards the downpayment on a house.
I agree you should be wise about what you spend, you should also make your day everything you ever wanted it to be because (ideally) you are only gonna do it one time. There are ways to get what you want without breaking the bank, people make sacrifices in areas that some wouldn't make. For example some people don't care if many people come and some folks want everybody in their lives to be there. Or some people would spend multiple thousands on a dress but have no flowers or a small cake.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that we make concessions and sacrifices based on what is important to us, but if you don't have to make sacrifices, then why not make it all you want it to be.
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
[quote="IvyPrincess"]I agree, while it seems that amongst some I have one of the larger budgets, I was blessed that my parents are paying for the entire day. So while they are paying for the wedding, my FH and I just payed off my car note and are putting away towards the downpayment on a house.
I agree you should be wise about what you spend, you should also make your day everything you ever wanted it to be because (ideally) you are only gonna do it one time. There are ways to get what you want without breaking the bank, people make sacrifices in areas that some wouldn't make. For example some people don't care if many people come and some folks want everybody in their lives to be there. Or some people would spend multiple thousands on a dress but have no flowers or a small cake.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that we make concessions and sacrifices based on what is important to us, but if you don't have to make sacrifices, then why not make it all you want it to be.
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Amen Ivy!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Welcome FFKitten. I think it's great that you are able to have the wedding you want for under $3000. I DIY'd practically everything for my wedding, tapped into friends for things, bought things off season and still ended up spending much much more than $10,000. Since we already have a home and were able to pay cash for everything we feel good about our choices. Although we did spend alot, we didn't spend nearly as much as our guests thought we had which is a reflection I think of our creativity and wise spending. While it's true we could have used the money to pay down our current debt(mortgage & student loans), we didn't acquire any new debt. Absolutely no regrets here.
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
First off, welcome to the board FF kitten. I have to say when it comes to wedding budgets, it's definitely a matter that ultimately must be decided by the couple based on what can be afforded without going into debt. Just because someone chooses to spend more than $3k does not mean they are spending foolishly or attempting to keep up with the Joneses. Our wedding and reception overall ended up being $25k, which we paid for ourselves in cash over the course of 10 months leading up to the wedding day, and without owing one red cent after the wedding day. In addition, DH's parents footed bill for honeymoon and rehearsal dinner. We are already homeowners, live a very comfortable lifestyle, both have stable, excellent-paying careers, still have a healthy savings, are not in debt and do not in any way regret anything about the wedding day, including the amount we spent. It was everything we ever dreamed of. I agree that folks shouldn't go in debt over one day, but everyone who spends what some would consider to be a lot for a wedding isn't in debt. Just my 2 cents.
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I hear ya'll! We are not homeowners-yet we spent 10K. We could buy a house if we wanted to right now because both our credit is good. My DH alone can be approved for over 200 K for a home loan with his great credit....however, we are just starting out careerwise, and decided that with our entry-level incomes, we want to be able to pay less than 45% towards housing fees such as mortgage, taxes, insurance, emergencies and the like, and income-wise we are just not there YET! Plus I just got out of grad school, and my student loan debt is ridiculous! I don't have to pay on it until March...AND I am planning to get a PhD! That being said, I think we made a conscious decision not to buy a home right now, but with the 10K spent in cash, we didn't add any debt either! We are still getting our eggs in a row...and truthfully, if we could have afforded it, we would have spent even more cash to have our dream wedding....Actually, we could have spent more because we saved so much money initially with the DIY, change in location, and my church not charging us a red cent! (plus the extra savings with only 100 of the 150 people coming to the wedding reception!) Shoot we even came out so much in the black with all the cash we got in gifts/along with gifts...we spent some on the honeymoon and was still able to put 2000.00 in the savings account...which by the way is still there untouched, plus some....and we got a brand new car (no note, no insurance) as a present too! So God was good all around (still is!).
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Thanks everyone who has welcomed me so far. I'm glad ya'll didn't scratch my eyes out! LOL
Like I mentioned before, everybody situation varies greatly from one another so whether you choose to spend 10 grand or 1 million as long as you're not doing it for the wrong reasons and not gonna drown in debt and you're good after the fact, FANTASTIC. And if you have parents that are paying the cost GREAT, as long as they too aren't taking out second, third and fourth mortgage's to out do Hatti Mae's daughter's grandchild's wedding. LOL As a woman of color, I think it's especially important to set a precedent when it comes to SAVING and spending. A lot of people aren't taught from a young age the importance and value of money and while a wedding is a beautiful occassion, some women negate their priorities and responsibilities that cost them BIG in the long run. Money is one of the number one factor(s) that cause stress in a marriage. I love to see couples of color marry and have a GOOD marriage-which are like a dime a dozen nowadays. Everybody got their "wifey's" and "baby daddy."
I'm personally tired of watching BET and seeing debt commercials rotating heavy on there.
Future: We're going to Aruba for our HM. I used my airline miles to secure the tickets and if you let the hotel know it's your honeymoon a lot of times they'll discount and have honeymoon gifts to throw in-so don't sleep on finding out what they can do for YOU wherever you decide to HM cause you're giving THEM business and it's in their interest to do you a solid.
See FFKitten....you fit right on in because all in all, you are using your skills and deals to make your wedding cost effective! And that thing about taking out 2nd, 3rd, and 4th mortgages is a mess! Too funny! But sad to say, people do it all the time...I'd hate to know my parents had did that for me...I wouldn't let them....but yep you're right about the need to save $$! We are in living in the days of the need to build wealth and savings!
I guess thats why we're waiting to buy a house....we live in a $500.00/month 1 bedroom apartment, and I don't think we'd qualify for a mortgage less than that...and our expenses with bills are about 1500.00, cause he's paying his student loan, and a couple of credit cards off (he pays 200.00+/month per card....-Hubby has a couple of cards with no limit, and even a black card that he never uses).Then 500.00/month goes in the savings so we are on our way....Its hard because in order to do that somebody (i.e: ME) had to stop shopping...but its a worthy cause....I am needing to be homeowners like my vibride sistah's here.
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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We didn't want to have a big wedding and had a budget of $5000 but after the wedding we only paid out $7316.00. We found someone who made arrangements with artificial flowers and our decorations where very simple. It helped that I had a wedding planner because she kept me within my budget. You will be amazed how much you can find at the dollar store and don't be afraid to ask people. My mother collects wine glasses and we had enough for the head table and parent table. My wedding planner did my save the dates, invitations, programs, menu cards on a laptop and home printer. We bought the paper and cardstock at Office Depot. You couldn't even tell. She was worth $700. We had so many complimants on how intimate and elegant our wedding was. That's what I wanted.
[quote="YVELYNNE1"]We didn't want to have a big wedding and had a budget of $5000 but after the wedding we only paid out $7316.00. We found someone who made arrangements with artificial flowers and our decorations where very simple. It helped that I had a wedding planner because she kept me within my budget. You will be amazed how much you can find at the dollar store and don't be afraid to ask people. My mother collects wine glasses and we had enough for the head table and parent table. My wedding planner did my save the dates, invitations, programs, menu cards on a laptop and home printer. We bought the paper and cardstock at Office Depot. You couldn't even tell. She was worth $700. We had so many complimants on how intimate and elegant our wedding was. That's what I wanted.
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Congrats on your wedding. It seemed to be very cost effective too! I agree, a good wedding planner is worth the splurge! Especially if the result is still an elegant and timely affair....
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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**BUMP**
Kaholgah, thought you might want to take a look at this.
Anyone else want to post their totals?
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
My total came to $15,500 and i swore i wanted to stay under $7000. I wish... lol
Boy, am I happy that I wasn't on this email a few months ago.
Anywho, we ending up spending 30K and it was all worth it! :-)
I'm honestly going to say I'm at 35k.. I think.. Maybe more.. Glad I'm not paying for it..
[quote="msermione"]I'm honestly going to say I'm at 35k.. I think.. Maybe more.. Glad I'm not paying for it..
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Welcome MsErmione! What a blessing a wedding that costs $35,000 and you don't have to pay for it?!?! God is good!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
ummm I think we ended up being somewhere around $25k
I just stopped counting after a while...it made me queasy..lol
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we have set a 13,000.00 budget and we are 1,021.00 over and still counting oct 11, 2008 cant come fast enough
We started on a $15,000 budget. With the help of my Vibride sisters and DIY projects that I'm doing myself, with the help of my bridal party, of course, we've been able to reduce that budget to $10,000 and it looks like it's going to work out. So far so good. I'm still trying to find ways in which I could save a few bucks here and there so it's a work in progress for us that will not exceed $10,000
Yes,
I'm truly blessed and can't thank God and my mom enough...
Hopefully the monetary gifts are added up to a nice total. We want to purchase a house.
I think once everything was over we were at at $10,500... and if I had not stopped adding/changing things, it would have been ALOT more...
Right now I'm a little over 6,000. I am still not finished yet, I have yet to get my dress, rings, favors, & flowers. So I already know that my total will be somewhere between 8,000-9,000. I can't wait to keep all my money!!! (LOL!)
ooh im rite here pam.. hope im not late lol , well with me ill be having two weddingsin sa and in us , soo our bugdets for each wedidng is set for 12k each , but sister genoue has been a great help in helping me reduce mine im now down to 11k for my sa wedding since its the first one im still hoping to reduce it to atleast 10k i been doing alot of reasearches and comparing prices soo i hope ill be able to nail it .plus i got a lot of crafty people back home that will behelping me in DIY 'S that shud save a couple of $$$ too .
Yea!!!!!! Kaholgah!!!!!!, way to go sister!!!
My totals so far:
Our cake topper was our very first purchase for the wedding. I'm ashamed to say that I paid almost $50 for it and the damn thing is huge! But I'll still use it.
- 100 Invitations * $21 from Target. They were on clearance and the sales lady didn't ring up one of the boxes.
- Reception * $1300 We had to give up a beautiful garden venue
for this community center with a large yard.
We saved a little over a grand, so it was worth it.
- Dress *$325 It's still a bit pricey for me since it's a knee length dress, but I like it. The lace work is beautiful. It was a good thing that I bought it when I did..the dress has been discontinued.
- Veil and Tiara *$80
Heres the tiara in my naps. I'm pretty proud of this purchase. The tiara was priced at $70 and the veil had a $170 ticket. The whole thing was a hook-up from the sales lady.
I've got some lbs to lose. hehe
- DJ * $800 We haven't booked him yet. I like that he specializes in Neo-soul and old school music along with hip-hop.
- Photographer * $800 I'm opting for the CD only packaging. I think that we can manage making our own albums.
- Cake *$325 We are using a bakery we use often. We have already paid them for their specialty white chocolate and strawberry champagne cake for 125 people. I got a 20% discount for booking so early.
- Flowers *$150 I had used one of those Ebay merchants who constructed bouquets from silk arrangements. It was a 21 piece deal. They will do and they are photogenic.
- Centerpieces *18 for roughly $400 I DIYed my centerpieces. I think that they look okay.
- Three bridesmaid dresses -*All together $204*
- Shotglass wedding favor - *109 for $143 I was told that using shotglasses as wedding favors is tacky, but I couldn't resist! DiscountMugs.com threw in 15 more than I had originally asked along with a 20% discount.
I think they are so cute, and I'm not a drinker except for the occasional c0cktail and chardonnay. I just happen to like souvenier shotglasses. Mine is green and has a different font and picture on it. I love it.
That brings my total so far to an estimated $4643.
We still have to book our transportation, officiant, guitarist or saxaphonist for the ceremony, caterer *we are using a restaurant that caters off-site and I refuse to go over $2000*, and Tables/chairs/linen rentals. If I decide to splurge, I will hire breakdancers for entertainment of the evening.
THis is my inspiration board for comparison. So far so good.
Well done Butterbean! Great job!! go head girl
Hi Butterbean,
I love your cake topper. We almost chose that one ourselves until I came across the gazebo cake topper and fell in love and had to get a bride and groom to go underneath.
It's amaaazing how much wedding viels can cost. I was like "Whoa!" But everything is a keepsake and can be preserved for future use.
Anyway, everything looks beautiful. Planning is so much fun, isn't it? And don't worry about your weight. You look beautiful, sistah!
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I am thinking of spending between 15,000 to 20,000. No more than that because we are paying for it.
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Depending on where you live, that shouldn't be a problem. I'm lucky to be living in Dallas rather than somewhere in New York where brides are hopelessly being gouged by vendors.
I find some high budgeted weddings not to be that much different than ones with a lower budget. So far, I am saving money by not going to vendors that specialize in weddings as much as I possibly can. I've saved nearly 1,500 by having my wedding at a community center rather than a place that is already set up for weddings. This place allows me to bring in my own catering, liquor, etc. The only problem I face is that I don't want to mention that my place is a community center on my invites. Instead of writing in the place's full name, "Springpark Recreation and Sports Center", I'll just write in "Springpark Center".
Since my venue allows me the freedom of using my own vendors instead of their contracted people, I can save even more money by using a restaurant that caters off-site. My sister complains that this place serves boring food, but Luby's Cafeteria offers their services for around $10 per person.
Haven't did the math yet so I'll try to here:
Ceremony & reception site: FREE! (church is free to members)
Bride's stuff: $525 dress, $12 veil, $13 shoes, $20 bracelet, $5 garter set, $20 blingy draws :), hair, earrings & headband FREE = $595
Groom's stuff: FREE
Kids' Stuff: $100 tux, $100 2 FG dress, $30 2 FG shoes and socks = $230
Food: FREE! (thanks mom)
Photographer: $650 (including flight from B-More)
DOC: $200
Soloist: $20
Flowers: $125
Decorations: $250
Chair Covers: $200
Cake: $225 (still working on getting some of this back!)
BP Gifts: $75
Invitations & Programs: $250 (including postage)
Misc: $180
GRAND TOTAL: $3000
(Dang! I did WAY better than I thought!)
Ok, if I add in rings, BM and my alterations, and the honeymoon I'm still at only $3500!
DH's aunt and uncle gave us their timeshare to use for the honeymoon - FREE! We're going to Hawaii for our 6-month anniversary in February!
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