As some of you know, my guestlist is currently huge (375) and may still be growing. Many of these folks are friends of my parents that I'm not really connected to, however cutting them from the guest list is not an option.
I'm considering doing 2 receptions in order to cut the cost of the folks I will have to actually feed dinner.
People will only be invited to one or the other reception.
I am having a church ceremony and then I'm considering having a small reception for like an hour in the fellowship hall of the church with cake, punch and snacky hors douvres, for the guests I don't know very well.
The other guests (family, close friends, OOT guests) will have dinner, dancing etc. at the offsite reception venue.
I'm sure this is not appropriate etiquette, however I'm trying to make my budget really work for me. What are your thoughts on this?
As some of you know, my guestlist is currently huge (375) and may still be growing. Many of these folks are friends of my parents that I'm not really connected to, however cutting them from the guest list is not an option.
I'm considering doing 2 receptions in order to cut the cost of the folks I will have to actually feed dinner.
People will only be invited to one or the other reception.
I am having a church ceremony and then I'm considering having a small reception for like an hour in the fellowship hall of the church with cake, punch and snacky hors douvres, for the guests I don't know very well.
The other guests (family, close friends, OOT guests) will have dinner, dancing etc. at the offsite reception venue.
I'm sure this is not appropriate etiquette, however I'm trying to make my budget really work for me. What are your thoughts on this?
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
I dont think that is a bad idea. I have actually seen that done at FH's cousins's wedding. the first reception was for about 1 1/2 hours and then the other reception started at another location.
To me, it shows appreciation to all the ppl that attended the ceremony, close or not, and maybe give them a different version of favors (cheaper version of course :-) ). I say do it, especially if it will help. I am sure everything will still turn out wonderful
I think it is a great idea Ivy! Remember this is YOUR day and if this fits your budget then be like Nike-JUST DO IT!!!!!! :)
I think the idea is nice, but I would add everything up and see if you are really saving a lot of $$ doing 2 different receptions. Are going to have 2 DJ's? 2 cakes? 2 programs? Will the reception last long enough, or wrap up soon enough that you will be energized for the last reception? Is the cost per person of this other reception that much cheaper than the Big one?
Just giving you some food for thought...Not to make things harder, but working it out now, can save frustration & worry later.
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I think that it would be a great idea and something diffrent I agree with Bumble just make sure you watch your budget...happy planning!
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Ivy if you decide to go the two reception route, you will need to have a very strict time schedule and stick to it. There probably won't be any room at all for deviations and any mishap will have a rippling effect on everything else. Your coordinator will need to be on point with helping maintain the timing of everything.
Will everyone know there's two different receptions? If not, how will you explain to everyone at fellowship hall why there are so few people there but a minute ago there was a church full?
Also,keep in mind with two receptions you run a risk of having less than perfect pictures. While mingling with the guests at the first reception, there's a chance that you (or others in your bridal party) could stain your clothing before making it to the next reception.
Just giving you a couple of things you will need to think about. factor in.
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
I think that by having two ceremony's you will be spending more money. I think you should sit your parents down and show them how drastic the guest list is and show them the complete cost of what everything will be. And if they still decide on paying for then let them pay for it
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I think you can work it but it's all about timing. I know you got some good advice on this before so I won't get into details but it can be done. Since the people invited to the 1st reception are not you and your FH's personal circle that'll make it easier. Your parents can linger with them while you guys leave to "take pictures!" LOL!
I think this is a good idea and can work if all the details are ironed out. Just some of the issues mentioned above, explaining to the people at the first reception where all the other people are, a time schedule has to be planned and followed, double check to make sure you really are saving money by doing this. Just basically iron out some of the issues the other ladies mentioned in the above posts, and I think the idea of 2 receptions is a great one Ivy!
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Ivy, you know that I always try to stick to our motto, your day your way, but in this instance, I think that if your parents are footing the bill and they're adding to the guest list, they know that it would cost more money for the reception. I would sit them down and talk to them openly and voice your worries that the guest list is now at 375 people and even at $10 PP, it's still nearly $4,000 (Not much for such a guest list, I'm still bowing down to how you pull that off Diva).
I thought that you were having 2 receptions but that one was to be at your hometown and the other, in Philly. Did I get it wrong? I think that to have the 2 receptions that you mention would create some hurt feelings because they're your parents guests and your parents are footing the bill for your wedding. I know that you want to save them some money, but they're proud of their daughter getting married. Just voice your concern and take it from there, after speaking to your parents, not before. And if your parents are okay with this, then proceed, but I'm betting that they won't be. And if you should decide to proceed anyway, just be prepared for those hurt feelings that I warned you about and it will cost you more to do such a thing, not less. I know that you do not need a hall for your earlier reception, but what is your contigency plan, if your attendants spill something on their clothing? You'd have to have a make up artist on hand all day in order that your makeup could remain fresh. I know that you have 2 wedding gowns, but your attendants wouldn't be able to afford 2 gowns, how will you compensate for that. And the children, they'll be tired after the 1st reception and may look really tired by the time the 2nd reception comes about and taking pictures with them, would be out of question.
My vote would be no, don't do it. Talk to your parents first and see what they say first, because they'll be a lot of hurt feelings because only your parents guests will be at that 1st reception. They may feel segregated and you'd have to understand that.