Telling a Friend

Rhonda,invite her for lunch and tell her.If she's a true friend,she'll understand and will support your decision to marry your FH.If she doesn't agree,then that means that she's just looking out for your best interest.Let her know that you appreciate her being there for you when you really needed her.And tell her that you'll be honored to have her as your MOH.

Rhoda always remember that fear is of the enemy...STEP OUT ON FAITH...tell her you know she has been there thru the ups and downs and it would mena the world to you if she is there on the side of you on your weddign day. Yes she may be sceptical but I feel that eventually she will be happy for you because she is your friend. You gatta love her thou becuase it says she really loves you and hurt when you hurt so in turn becuase you are now happy she will be happy. Blessings

I listen to my girlfriends all the time, and they lend a ear to me, but the thing is, she may shock you by saying 'it's about time'. Love is a series of highs and lows, but endurence is what turns it into a perfect love. She's your friend she'll be happy because you're happy.

Rhonda, I too confided in two girlfriends -- one of 29 years and the other of 35 years. Most people feel that your business is your business, but sometimes the situation can be so overbearing (I know) that you need someone to talk to. Confiding in family is the worse thing to do. My girlfriend of 29 years was there for me, and still is -- she is a true friend. Now I did not confide in the friend of 35 years as much as the one of 29 years. When I told the one of 35 years that I was getting married, she asked, "are you sure you want to do that?" She was going through a divorce at the time so I just thought she was going through a difficult time. Then when my husband and I bought our house, she said, "it is about time you got settled" -- no congratulations -- nothing. So I realized more was going on with her besides my marriage. We used to talked to each other often for hours, and called each other on our birthdays. Since my marriage she does not call me much, if at all, and much less on birthdays. I still call her -- I like to know how she is doing. Basically, what I am saying is ask your friend out to lunch or dinner, and ask her to be your maid of honor. If she is truly a friend, she will be there for you regardless. I hope she chooses to be there for you, but if she does not, let her work things out for herself as I decided to do with my "friend." I know it will not be easy, but some things we do not have control over. Marry your love as I did mine. I thought my "friend" would be there for me always in any situation, but as it turns out my husband is here for me regardless of what we have been through. I wish you all the best, and good luck with your friend.

Did anyone see that episode of "Sex in the City" last night when Carrie and Miranda had that huge fight because Mr. Big called Carrie and asked her out to lunch after he and his wife split up, Miranda was very upset because she does not want Carrie to get hurt again...it was there first in all the years they were friends and in the end they kissed and made up...."True friends are like diamonds precious yet rare....false friends are like autumn leaves found every where" she will be happy for you Rhoda!

Rhonda, Charlotte is so right -- your friend will be there for you. By the way, Charlotte I love the quote, "True friends are like diamonds . . . . In my situation, I always knew my "friend" of 35 years had issues with me, and it was not about seeing me get hurt by a man. I chose to ignore the issues, we were friends since the 8th grade. Until my marriage, etc., I just did not know how deep her issues were.

Thanks ladies.....but you know what! even thou friends sometimes disappoint us, I really do not think they mean harm ya know, most can't handle you being so happy especially if they themselves have not found true love to knwo what happiness is....That sounds a little crazy I am sure but let me tell you this..(ya'll know I always have a story) when I got married 1994 my oldest sister just could not handle it, off course she said nothing to me but the things she did at the wedding told me she was jealous, she sat next to our oldest sister and called me a #@tch while I was saying my vows, she wore BLACK, she found fault in everything... I never said anything to her about it after all these years, but I continue to show her love. My point is don't be upset with her, she may just not know better, continue to show her love as I did my older sister and her conscience will make them come around.

Girl, you want me to come to the wedding and put her in a head lock? You know I got you! LOL!!

Charlotte, I agree with Daughter, I like your style, girl (LOL). Charlotte, you hit it on the nail -- jealousy -- I knew it with my girlfriend, but just did not want to say it before. When I got married the first time, she was planning her wedding as well to take place two months after my wedding (I was even one of her bridesmaids). Somehow after she got married, she started putting me in some sort of competition with her -- I was not playing her game. When she and her husband bought their house, it did not make any difference that I never had a house with my first husband, I could not have been more happy for them. When she and her husband were going through -- I was there for her, still am, still love her, and as I said before I just look over her issues.

Ladies I really appreciate all of you, I wish we could post our picture on this site so we can see one another. All you'll right..but do you know why we do what we do inspite of ignorant people....because we realize at the end of the day there is a God that we must answer to and I don't know about you but I do not want to get on his bad side. Be Blessed my sistas.

Never underestimate the power of a real "friendship"...be blessed and have a fabulous time together.

Congratulations DaughterRhonda! True friends come through every time!

Rhonda, I was hoping that you would give us an update. The tears are coming --I am soooo happy for you, but I told you she would be there for you -- true friends are forever.