Ladies, I need your opinion on something. I have a bridesmaid and I don't know what to think of her. Since the beginning of me and FH announcing we were getting married, I've had a feeling that either she was jealous or just one of those people that try to find negativity out of things. When we first started talking about my wedding, she asked "What does your mother think about all of this?" I told her my mom was happy for me but she's not as excited as I am because it's not her wedding. Later on, my mother told me that she saw her in the store and the girl asked her the same question. Then me and the girl was talking about the wedding again and she asked what did FH say about everything. I asked her why does she keep asking that and she didn't have anythign to say. Then she said, hypothetically if someone wanted to pay $50 or $60 for a dress, what would I say. And then she said she really didn't feel that way, she was just asking. Is it just me or do she seem flaky?
Ladies, I need your opinion on something. I have a bridesmaid and I don't know what to think of her. Since the beginning of me and FH announcing we were getting married, I've had a feeling that either she was jealous or just one of those people that try to find negativity out of things. When we first started talking about my wedding, she asked "What does your mother think about all of this?" I told her my mom was happy for me but she's not as excited as I am because it's not her wedding. Later on, my mother told me that she saw her in the store and the girl asked her the same question. Then me and the girl was talking about the wedding again and she asked what did FH say about everything. I asked her why does she keep asking that and she didn't have anythign to say. Then she said, hypothetically if someone wanted to pay $50 or $60 for a dress, what would I say. And then she said she really didn't feel that way, she was just asking. Is it just me or do she seem flaky?
I think the sistah is flaky. Why is she so concerned about what your mom and FH think? I don't know what kind of relationship yoh have with this bridesmaid, but in my opinion, she is completely out of line. You said yourself "Since the beginning of me and FH announcing we were getting married, I've had a feeling that either she was jealous or just one of those people that try to find negativity out of things." Your instincts will never lead you wrong. Keep your eyes and ears open, and check that if the behavior continues. This should be your happiest time and you don't need the drama or the negative energy. All the best SeptBride, gurl you deserve it!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Watch her closely and if she continues this behavior, don't be afraid to dismiss her. Everbody won't be happy for you and it's a shame that the people you expect to celebrate your joy the most are the same one's who try to kick you back in. I recently went threw the same thing with one of my (EX)bridesmaids who dropped out because she said she couldn't afford it, even after several of my family members offered to help her financially. Let her know that her comments and sarcasm is not appreciated. Maybe she doesn't realize how she is coming off. Is she is truly your friend and genuinely happy for you, she'll stop. Good luck!
Well said Nlbostic!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Rhonda and nlbostic, thank you very much for your comments. My mother thinks that just how she is - nosey. Rhonda you hit the nail on the head, why is she so concerned? I'm going to see if it keeps up and then she will be dismissed. I don't need that nonsense right now. We have been friends for the past 4 years but I've known her about 12 years.
We got your back! In any event I wish you all the best! I am learning that it will all work out, with or without some of the people that you originally began your bridal party with!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Ok my nubian sistah's, I vote that we start a support group and join together to rid our lives of unstable, flaky, toxic and just down right jealous individuals who are not supporting us through this wedding process. My goodness, I think practically every woman here has expressed some level of drama related to family and or friends, this kind of behaviour must be stopped. Makes me wanna call out for Captain Planet or some other such "hero" from my..*ahem*...younger days.
In all seriousness tho, I can see how some folk might think planning a wedding is like planning a big party and as such don't understand why brides and grooms get so disappointed but I think considering the impact of what a wedding represents, we should get more love. Stay strong SeptBride, good always triumphs over evil!
** It doesn't take the whole day to recognize sunshine **
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Ditto Taunyana!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Thank you ladies very much for your support. I love you guys!!!! awwwwwwwwwww
We luv you 2!!!!!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
SeptBride, you're welcome for the support and yes, we love you too!
** It doesn't take the whole day to recognize sunshine **
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Sept bride......be strong....all this hating will pay off..watch- you're going to be beautiful...REGARDLESS....I am so tired of jealous people tryin to snatch joy...
HIS eye is on the sparrow, and I know HE watches.........me
I know thats right IslandBride, I am determined to have my special day, and no one can still my joy!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I think the best part of us can detect a "hater" instantly...the trick to that is to avoid them at all cost, now I do not mean if you see them go the next way...no!, just avoid asking their opion or suggeston, ignore them to the max and avoid all the unnecessary stress from them. Women are so jealous it surprises me how we can not be supportive of one another, trust me she will be ok and your wedding will be flawless.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
I think all of you are exactly right. Your instincts will tell you something is not right. She is jealous. Any little detail that you give her about your wedding she will run and tell everyone and talk badly about it. I don't know how close you two are, but I had to learn the hard way. Don't let her get next to you.
You are right TonyaLanette, I had to learn the hard way too. I will tell you one thing, I do not have to learn the same lesson twice, so I don't discuss the details of my wedding with anyone I know is "hating" or being jealous. I am much more happier because I am learning how to keep my mouth shut.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Nothing like a good kick in the hip to snap you back into reality ah!....we have a saying here that goes..."that'll learn ya!.....keep ya business to yourself.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
And yes I received one of those kicks, and it hurts -- sistah don't want to go there again!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Once bitten twice shy ah!
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
True dat!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Will y'all believe that darn girl asked me again "How does your mother feel"? I'm about 1.365 seconds away from going off on her! I had to ask my mother did she ever say anything to her that would make her keep asking me that. I think it's that she got married straight out of high school and got a divorce the next year. Maybe that has something to do with it.
maybe Askalot, but girlfriend needs something to do! I would hate to see her end up in the trash!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
When you said she seemed "Flaky" you know what came to my mind.....danruff (spelling)...ya know how they can be all over ya clothes and a total nusense when you really try to hide them...well that is exaclty how she appears to me...watch that falky sista down with drain with the rest of the dandruff......You need to surprise her sudden the next time she comes to you with this and say "LOOK!".......WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM, YOU ARE EITHER MY BRIDESMAID OR YO NEED TO GET TA STEPPING, I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS, I HAVE A WEDDING TO PLAN"...That'll shock the hell out of her and she may stop.....nothing beats a try but a failure and in this case, we need to pull out all the big guns.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
Yeah, that's good one Charly.
and she's so descriptive with it (lol!!!)
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Girl I gat dandruff so I can identiy.............lol lol!
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
Askalot,that chick is JEALOUS!Plain and simple.I think we all have atleast one friend or family member like that.My advice, don't waste any more energy with her; focus on your special day.Remember, you're marrying your FH, not her.o if she can't be happy for you, give her the boot!
Born Blessed!
That's right Platinum, I agree with ya!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37