We still have about 40 people who haven't responded. I'm worried there will be a sizable number who we won't be able to get ahold of and who will just show up without RSVPing. We're trying to call these people up. Some we have left messages, some still aren't sure, most are my fiance's parents friends and I don't really know how much effort they're putting in to find out if they're comming, or how much they can do since many of these people they haven't seen in a long time and they may not have up to date phone numbers. The numbers should work out well enough so that we don't need to turn people away as long as we find out at least a few days before the wedding, but it's delaying out seating chart and I'm worried we won't have enough tables or meals for people who just sort of show up unannounced. Any suggestions?
We still have about 40 people who haven't responded. I'm worried there will be a sizable number who we won't be able to get ahold of and who will just show up without RSVPing. We're trying to call these people up. Some we have left messages, some still aren't sure, most are my fiance's parents friends and I don't really know how much effort they're putting in to find out if they're comming, or how much they can do since many of these people they haven't seen in a long time and they may not have up to date phone numbers. The numbers should work out well enough so that we don't need to turn people away as long as we find out at least a few days before the wedding, but it's delaying out seating chart and I'm worried we won't have enough tables or meals for people who just sort of show up unannounced. Any suggestions?
Hey there and welcome:)
I don't know how long you have until your wedding, but keep calling!
If you get any voice mail, remember to let them know that they have x amount of time to let you know their status...also remember (if you so choose) that the reception or whatever is RSVP only...because once you give your caterers the final number usually they want it 3-14 days before the event (make sure you know when YOUR caterers require the final number)...they will accomodate that number, and anyone not on your final list that comes will either have to be accomodated (and you will have to spring for the extra plates) or turned away...My fiancee has already told me that anyone wo doesn't RSVP will be turned away...so you really have to work hard at calling those last 40 folks, and be up front about if you will be turning away anyone not on that list! So be diligent about that...and make sure your fiancee's parents are on top of things....
I think everything will be fine though...Good luck!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Excellent advice Bumble!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I totally disagree....doesn't the bride have enough to worry about other than calling people to remind them to RSVP.......NOT!!!! they don't RSVP they don't have a place....simple!
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
[quote="CharlotteModebe"]I totally disagree....doesn't the bride have enough to worry about other than calling people to remind them to RSVP.......NOT!!!! they don't RSVP they don't have a place....simple!
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Good advice but beware of those WHO SHOW UP ANYWAY!
Each One Teach One!
Hi Iesha, is that a picture of you in your signature?
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Charly those are my sentiments exactly! The bride should not have to be worried about calling up those who have not RSVP'd. If they don't meet the deadline, oh well. They won't eat! Sounds ugly but if they are provided a rsvp card, with envelope and stamp to send back and they still don't they are SOL! Just plan for the ones you have and the others can pay for their meals if they decide to come anyway. Best wishes
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Listen you'll need ushers and hostesses to the door who will put their foot down and not allow people to enter who have not RSVP's....the reason for this card is plan and simple and I believe the bride and groom's wishes should be respected...come on man - these people have to live after the wedding ya know!!!
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
That's right.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
[quote="CharlotteModebe"]I totally disagree....doesn't the bride have enough to worry about other than calling people to remind them to RSVP.......NOT!!!! they don't RSVP they don't have a place....simple!
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You're right...she does have a lot to think about without having to chase folks down! I would only call if I really want them to come, but there is a limit to what you can do. At some point you have to set limits. As for uninvited guests, you have to decide if you want the ushers to keep the ones who didn't RSVP out. Use family members and the door ushers to remind these non-RSVPers that the food is paid for and those not on the list who sneak food (Especially if you do a buffet, like we are) will run the couple's bill up....(Funny enough-thats what my FH wants to do instead of turning folks away-especially if they drive 100 miles but forgot to RSVP-I guess I see what he means) All in all, you have decide if its worth the extra effort to call or turn people away....
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I read online that most coordinators will try to contact people 3 times, if they connect reach those people after the third attempt with no response they stop all trying. Once the RSVP date has passed they send out a letter telling people that the list has closed and no more RSVP's will be accepted. I created a modifiable letter some where on the boards that can be used and I will also try to find the real one that a real coordinator might use online.
These people don't sound like they are very important to your every day life ( no up to date phone number, friends of fiance's parents) and if they aren't putting out the effort, neither should you.
If you are going to allow people to attend w/o rsvp then give a generous guestimate of how many people you expect to show up and build your seating chart around those people that have been considerate enough to rsvp
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way. ~ Pablo Neruda
Excellent advice FutureMsLee!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I definitely agree with FutureMrsLee. Its time for some peace of mind!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Well said Bumble!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
You guys are GOOD! Everyone is really right on point. 3 calls-- no more no less. Stick to your RSVP and definately let 'em know that there is no room at the inn should they show up anyway!. ALWAYS give the caterer 10 places over your final count. It covers strays and a guest bringing a guest you did not expect! Alo you won't run out of food if you have greedy buffet eaters (I had some at my wedding). just like faovrs ALWAYS order at least 25 more than you think you need!
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Such good advice, I thought I will bump this one up for all of the upcoming brides.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I am not planning for anyone who has not Rsvp'd they will not have a place to sit a plate to eat from, or a favor to take home.
Our wedding is a DW so the most I can do is see if they can attend the ceremony.
I still have like 25 maybes and the wedding is in June.
By june 1, 2007 I am not planning another thing. All my lists will be set and I will not be doing any rearranging.
I think it is very disrespectful for anyone to just show up because they got an invite. If it says please tell us if you will be there have the common decency to send the card back. Wasting my good money on stamps, Shoot!!!
That's how I feel about that.
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