hoping some guests will decline invite?

I also felt the same way when sending my invites. Don't worry, some people will decline or just not respond at all. You will also have some that will respond and not show up. A word from experience (someone tried to tell me, but I didnt listen) if you get 200 positive repsonses, dont give your caterer 200. You will get stuck paying for some that won't show up. At the end of my wedding, I had 11 name cards (couples) left on the table.

My fiance and I had previously agreed to 75-80 guests as we want to keep things manageable. Recently, I've learned that my fiance wants to invite more people that were not on our original guest list. Since he is helping to pay for this wedding I can't tell him he can't invite more people. However, it is my desire that we stick with our 80 person max list.

[quote="nlbostic"]I also felt the same way when sending my invites. Don't worry, some people will decline or just not respond at all. You will also have some that will respond and not show up. A word from experience (someone tried to tell me, but I didnt listen) if you get 200 positive repsonses, dont give your caterer 200. You will get stuck paying for some that won't show up. At the end of my wedding, I had 11 name cards (couples) left on the table.
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Thank you Bossie I will keep that in mind!

BG, I am hoping that some decline, so you are not alone! My biggest stressor is how many people will actually show up. We moved our reception to the Convention & Trade Center. Needless, to say it is more expensive per person. We have already cut our guest list from 300 to 225 but I'm thinking 200 now. An associate of mine got married over the weekend and she invited and planned for 150 but 215 showed up for the reception. You just never can tell. Best wishes

Welcome to the site,Babygirl!Don't feel bad,I feel the same way but not for the reasons that the other ladies stated.I feel that some of the guests won't act right.Especially those that can't handle their alcohol.But,I feel obligated to invite them because they're family.

All of us want a few people to decline (either to free up the extra space for people we really want there OR because of $ or space restrictions) Yes I am one of them that need the extra spots for people I'd rather spent that time with.

So you see BabyGirl you are not alone!

Good luck my sister!

I know how you feel, 110%. If you refer to one of my previous posts called "rsvps coming in.....i'm getting scared", you'll see what I mean.

We over-invited expecting certain people to decline, and they ACCEPTED! That's why I'm getting scared!

[quote="babygirl1180"]I am about to print my invitations in the next week and looking at the guest list i'm already hoping that some of my guests will decline the invite so that i can make sure others are invited w/out going over budget....IS ANYONE ELSE HOPING THAT SOME GUEST WILL DECLINE????
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Me and my fiance are going to create an A list and a B list. Those on the A list of course are the ones we feel HAVE to be there....so we'll send those out early-6-7 months...then as those come in, we'll send out the B list-those who will be offended if they didn't get an invite, but we won't really miss them at the wedding as much as those on the A list. Those who don't respond from the A list will leae openings. The B list has less time to respond, decreasing the liklihod, they'll come, but they'll get it nevertheless. I've heard this works, so if you try it, let me know. I think it may decrease the stress though...

Your best bet would have been to invite those whom you wanted to be there and not those who you didn't.

[quote="ieasha"]Your best bet would have been to invite those whom you wanted to be there and not those who you didn't.
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After going through our guest list, we have already cut many people out, and are still cutting....In the end ieasha is so right....If there are people you are hoping will decline, then those are the ones not to invite...and go from there...

I understand what you mean. I feel like my mother is making me invite members of my family that I don't particularly get along with. Parents have the tendency to try and make your wedding day their own. People on my side and the grooms side are very iffy. I never know what they're going to do. I'm thinking about overbooking, just in case people don't show. We don't want anymore than 150 people but I think we'll invite 175 just in case. I also have a similar problem with people not being able to maintain self control under the influence. My own mother has that problem. I'm a little worried but I'm hoping and praying that the day will go off without a hitch. There is still so much planning to be done.

Hi Kariba, when are you getting married?

I am with Iesha on this one -- I can't afford to invite people I wish weren't there at all; why invite them? That is what wedding announcement cards are for! Send invites to the people you really wish to celebrate with and can afford to be there and announcments to those you wish to inform of your upcoming nuptials.

I'm getting married August 17, 2007.

I feel the same way we got a discount on the hall because the original estimate given was 70 people the guest list is at 100 we cut it back to 70 now my fiance has extra guest that i never new about
so i really hope people decline, and i don't get an extra bill the day of the wedding

I have a strict limit of 100 people cus I am not going over that. I will do the A and B list thing but only up to 100. How do you suggest coping with people who ask why they were not invited? In my family my I have many second cousins who are close to my age but for financial reasons I opted to only invite my first cousins. I am hoping no one cares enough to sk why he or she was not invited.

Kariba, you chose a wonderful date! That's my birthday! Oh, welcome to the site

Knimmers when is your wedding date? And welcome to the sistahood.

September 16, 2006 its almost time.
Thanks for the welcome

[quote="mycenae1918"]I have a strict limit of 100 people cus I am not going over that. I will do the A and B list thing but only up to 100. How do you suggest coping with people who ask why they were not invited? In my family my I have many second cousins who are close to my age but for financial reasons I opted to only invite my first cousins. I am hoping no one cares enough to sk why he or she was not invited.
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I thought about that over and over again, and it really comes down to BUDGET....I have put out the word that its going to be family only, and we have told only a few friends who are single that they won't be able to bring a guest....My friends who find out about my engagement have already asked me if they can come, and my response is: I will have to check my list because with just our huge families we are already over budget-which is already tight..."
But once the family's responses come back with or without declines, we will then deal with friends on an individual basis....When we did our original count (175), we included family AND their # of children (1/2 price) so we can get the most realistic view of who is likely to come...then we went through people very very not likely to travel and that got us down to 160.......(80 invites) and we are still looking to cut.....
Whats the point? So we are giving the hotel an estimate of 175....but we are underinviting and then a month and a half before wedding we will send out the last invites based on the number of people who decline.....We are also sending word to families via our parents that whoever doesn't respond cannot be accomodated when they arrive because the number will be set....this is not true, but it will be encouraged.....