The Illegitimate Bride

You include the names of the people hosting the wedding, so if is you and you fiance, that's the only names you list. Many brides walk down the aisle alone.

[quote="mycenae1918"]Thanks. I was hoping not to feel like a freak while walking down the aisle. I guess I will only put our names on the engagement announcements as well.
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You won't be a freak...just imagine yourself as the princess walking down to meet your Prince! (Like on Coming to America!) If my dad had not come around in the last few years, best believe I would have been strutting my stuff right on down that aisle with my tiara and all. All those who CHOOSE to miss out-miss out. And you are not illegitimate! You were called from the womb by your Father up above before your mother even concieved you, so there is no embarassment about it! My dad didn't want to be involved with me initially, and was even guilted into staying with my mom-thats another story!

If you want to please all involved, the easiest way to go is to sort of give in on the invites:

"The families of BRIDE'S FULL NAME and GROOM's FULL NAME invite you to celebrate......"

It doesn't exactly follow the rules of ettiquette, but you can't leave ANYBODY out by saying that...AND even a few who didn't will be included, but maybe their hearts WANTED to help financially, but couldn't. And its not hurting you either-it'll always be about you and your FH.

Because I have a dad and a stepdad, and then a whole slew of other family members who will be chipping in finacially and even with just their time, I will just put that up above...

But as far as that aisle thing, you get your tiara, because you are the daughter of the KING OF KINGS-therefore making you- A PRINCESS:) and you should walk down the aisle as such:) God Bless!

Welcome, mycenae1918! If you ar estranged from your dad, then there is no reason to hoor him by having him walk you down the aisle. Is there someone else who has made an impact on your life? An Uncle or best friend even a favorite cousin can take that walk with you. If your mom is up for it SHE can walk you down the aisle, because she will be the one giving you away to your husband.

There is much flexibility in how you present yourself before God to your husband. Do what makes you feel comfortable.

Great ideas, Bumblebeekee!

I jus LOVE your avatars, MO.

Hi there Mycenae1918 and welcome to this site! You can put you and your fiance's names on the invite. If you guys are hosting then put your names there. If you are estranged from your dad, you can walk down the aisle alone. You can have a good friend, family member, aunt, or your Mom walk you down the aisle. It is your choice. Be encouraged, it will all work out in the end. Lastly I'd like to say that you have nothing to be embarassed about, God loves you!

Ms.Mycenae gyrlie let me tell you. My mom and dad were married when both me and my brother were concieved snd born but he hasnt been around that much in 22 years. I do not keep in contact with him and really could care less if he was to come around. My step dad on the other had has been around since I was 2 and thats who I call daddy. Recently we havent been as close as we were but thats because he lives in Texas and I'm in California. I want him to walk me down the aisle along with my mother, if he cant make it just my mother. I think its all up to you who walks you down the aisle. If you wanted to get a complete stranger then its your day and you can do what you want.Nowadays brides are doing things so much of the opposite of how they did when our parents were getting married, and you will see that from the ideas from the sistahood here.As far as the invitations and engagements go I believe you put the hosting parties name on them. For me and my FH we will be doing it so our names will be on everything. I also like the idea to put the family names on the so no one feels left out or gets upset or offended. Talk to you FH about these things and see how he feels.

By the way welcome to the site and I hope that you find everything you need and more from this site.When is the big day? colors you are thinking of..

THE ONLY FATHER I KNEW WAS MY GODFATHER AND HE DIED 3 YEARS AGO THIS MARCH... MY MOM TOLD ME I HAD TWO FATHERS NEITHER ONE OF THEM DID ANYTHING FOR ME WOULD I BE WRONG IF I LET MY GOD BROTHER AR ONE OF MY UNCLE WALK ME DOWN THE AISLE

[quote="threjolyn"]THE ONLY FATHER I KNEW WAS MY GODFATHER AND HE DIED 3 YEARS AGO THIS MARCH... MY MOM TOLD ME I HAD TWO FATHERS NEITHER ONE OF THEM DID ANYTHING FOR ME WOULD I BE WRONG IF I LET MY GOD BROTHER AR ONE OF MY UNCLE WALK ME DOWN THE AISLE
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You won't be wrong for picking one of them to walk you down the aisle. Do what moves you...and seek the kingdom first on the decisions you need to make.

Do your thing! Walk by yourself, walk with your mother, walk with a close friend. Do what is going to make you happy. Its your day, go for it!

Well said Ieasha!

don't be embarassed at all about it. My father was a jerk when I was growing up, he was not around and I hated him. I considered having one of my uncles walk me down the aisle or my FH's father.

But me and papa dearest have resolved SOME of our issues in the past few years. I still can't be around him for more than an hour - which will be difficult since tomorrow he and one of my uncles will be on a road trip from California to Mississippi for a family reunion.

But have no shame in walking down that aisle with your head held high all by your lonesome walking towards the one you love. And if only you and your FH are hosting the ceremony, only your names go on your announcements.

I don't know if you should tell him or not, I would say that totally depends on the kind of relationship that you and him currently have. You have also mentioned that you are paying for your wedding so I don't think you need anyone's approval for asking someone else to give you away. My father was not around when I was growing up at all. My brother is giving me away and I didn't tell my dad or ask him for his opinion. My father has attempted to establish a relationship with me and I can see at best we are friends, but I don't see him as a "Father figure". He had a stroke a few months ago and I realize that life is precious and I hope that we can one day be closer. His name is not on my invitations at all. My fiance and I are paying for everything and we put our daughter's name on the invitations. In any event I wish you all the best.

My father chose not to be a part of my life and he died when i was 8 years old. i honestly cannot think of one man who has consistently supported me or my choices besides my FH. I had originally been thinking of asking a collector of my FH's art who has always cheered for us as a couple but reading this post, i've had a change of heart. I am walking down the aisle on my own two feet with God in my heart, the same way i came to my relationship. I think i'll ask the art collector/friend to join me in a special dance at the reception since he is quickly becoming a father figure to both of us (FH's dad passed in 2000).

Congrats and Welcome to all. My 1st time around my uncle walked me down the aisle. My dad was deceased but since we were never close to begin with, it was never my intention for him to walk me. My uncle,though only 7 years older was a huge influence in my life so he EARNED the honor. If not him I wld have walked myself down, Proudly!! You are a grown and intelligent Woman. You do not need anyone to validate you. God already did that by bringing you into this world. In my opinion(here we go-lol)the word illegitimate is another 1 of those words 1 class of people use to make themselves seem bigger or better than another group. The circumstances of your conception had nothing to do with you, so Please do not allow yourself to be affected by it. As far as wording is concerned,It may seem selfish to some or not the Christian way to other but since fh and I are paying, we only put our names. We have our own relationship w/God and he knows our hearts. This was not meant as disrespect to our parents, since they will always be our parents, but there is no way you can include everyone in everything. Things done from the heart are just that and no one who does from their heart will take offense to you not putting there name on your invite. Take a poll, how many people have copies of wedding invitations besides there own??? EXACTLY. And those who do, like me,:)have hem in a box somewhere in my basement. Many Blessings and do it your way.

That was said perfectly, couldnt have said it better myself.