This is something I received today in email and thought I'd share is with my sistas.
Eph. 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and
shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
Being unhappy with yourself can cause a lot of marital problems.
Especially when it is misguided or your unhappiness is misdirected. We
sometimes are ashamed to talk to our spouses about these types of
things because we feel like it belittles us or makes us look
"undesirable" or "problem plagued" but to tell the truth, we look more
undesirable when we hold things in and shut our spouses out. If you
cannot talk to your spouse about everything, then something is wrong.
There should be a bond there that says "you and I are one, so whatever
i am, you are" That's the way God intended for a marriage to be. If you
have hang ups about sharing things with your spouse, then your
relationship is in trouble. There should be no one closer to you than
the one you are married to. You should be able to talk about
everything. Even things that make you feel uncomfortable or
embarrassed. That's why your spouse should always be your best friend.
Not just someone to sleep with, eat with, or go out with when you want
to have fun. But your very dearest friend should be the one that knows
you the best.
Your best friend, if it's not your spouse, is holding a position in
your life that belongs to the person you are married to. The secrets
of your heart must be shared with the one you are married to before you
ever think about talking to anyone else. If you want a successful
marriage, then you have to make some changes. If you want the hand of
God on your life men, then you have to first honor your wife. If you
want to be blessed of God women, then you must first submit to your
husband. These are the rules and if you want to get to that next level
in your life, take care of your spouse. God honors your covenant with
the person you married and they deserve to be your best friend, your
lover, and your confidant! If you have trouble being real with your
spouse or if you are afraid to open up because of things that happened
in the past, pray to God for his power to intervene. God can step in
and give you boldness and he can also prepare the heart of your spouse
so that they can receive you. God is pro-marriage and he will do what
you need him to in order to secure your relationship. After all, your
marriage is a reflection of him and he wants you reflecting his glory
in all that you do.
Suggested Reading: Heb. 13:4, 1Cor. 7:10, 1Cor. 7:33, 1Cor. 7:34
This is something I received today in email and thought I'd share is with my sistas.
Eph. 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and
shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
Being unhappy with yourself can cause a lot of marital problems.
Especially when it is misguided or your unhappiness is misdirected. We
sometimes are ashamed to talk to our spouses about these types of
things because we feel like it belittles us or makes us look
"undesirable" or "problem plagued" but to tell the truth, we look more
undesirable when we hold things in and shut our spouses out. If you
cannot talk to your spouse about everything, then something is wrong.
There should be a bond there that says "you and I are one, so whatever
i am, you are" That's the way God intended for a marriage to be. If you
have hang ups about sharing things with your spouse, then your
relationship is in trouble. There should be no one closer to you than
the one you are married to. You should be able to talk about
everything. Even things that make you feel uncomfortable or
embarrassed. That's why your spouse should always be your best friend.
Not just someone to sleep with, eat with, or go out with when you want
to have fun. But your very dearest friend should be the one that knows
you the best.
Your best friend, if it's not your spouse, is holding a position in
your life that belongs to the person you are married to. The secrets
of your heart must be shared with the one you are married to before you
ever think about talking to anyone else. If you want a successful
marriage, then you have to make some changes. If you want the hand of
God on your life men, then you have to first honor your wife. If you
want to be blessed of God women, then you must first submit to your
husband. These are the rules and if you want to get to that next level
in your life, take care of your spouse. God honors your covenant with
the person you married and they deserve to be your best friend, your
lover, and your confidant! If you have trouble being real with your
spouse or if you are afraid to open up because of things that happened
in the past, pray to God for his power to intervene. God can step in
and give you boldness and he can also prepare the heart of your spouse
so that they can receive you. God is pro-marriage and he will do what
you need him to in order to secure your relationship. After all, your
marriage is a reflection of him and he wants you reflecting his glory
in all that you do.
Suggested Reading: Heb. 13:4, 1Cor. 7:10, 1Cor. 7:33, 1Cor. 7:34
Askalot that was just so beautiful and inspiring. Thank you so much for sharing and having the sistahood in mind when you received this awesome pearl of wisdom!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
That's powerful Askalot! Thanks for sharing! It really hits home.
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You ladies are very welcome! I printed it out so that my FH can read it also.
ASKALOT, YOU REALLY KNOW HOW TO LIFT A GIRL SPIRITS
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Awwww... I try sometimes. lol
You did good!
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THANK YOU THANK YOU SOOO MUCH. SEE GOD GIVES U WHAT U NEED WHEN U NEED IT. MY MOH IS MY BEST FRIEND SINCE 4TH GRADE. WE HAVE BEEN THROUGH SOOO MUCH TOGETHER AND I LOVE HER DEARLY. SHE WAS THERE THROUGH 1ST BAD MARRIAGE AND I HAVE BEEN THERE WITH HER. OUR PROBLEM IS JUST WHAT U WROTE ABOUT. MY FH IS MY SOULMATE..MY BEST FRIEND...THE MAN WHO'S RIB THE FATHER TOOK, TO MAKE ME. WE SHARE EVERYTHING. AND WHILE I WILL ALWAYS NEED HER, HE PROVIDES ALL I NEED AFTER THE LORD. SHE DOES NT FEEL LIKE I VALUE HER FRIENDSHIP AS MUCH SINCE WE DO NT SPEND AS MUCH TIME TOGETHER. I WORK AND HAVE A 2 YEAR OLD AS WELL AS THE 6 OTHER KIDS. I WILL ADMIT IN THE PAST, WE SPOKE EVERYDAY AND NOW I SHARE W/HIM ALL THE THINGS I USED TO SHARE W/HER. IN HER DEFENSE SHE IS NOT HAPPY IN HER MARRIAGE BUT HAS NT DECIDED WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT. I HAVE BEEN THERE TO LISTEN AND ALL OF THE ABOVE BUT WHEN WE TALK WE END UP HOLDING THE PHONE. MY SOLUTION WAS TO NOT TALK EVERYDAY BUT WAIT UNTIL WE HAVE SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT. I DON'T NOT CALL HER ON PURPOSE. MY LIFE IS JUST SO D**** BUSY. AND I HAVE A NEW BEST FRIEND. I TRIED TO TELL HER HE DOES NT REPLACE HER BUT I DON'T THINK SHE GETS IT. DURING MY LAST MARRIAGE, EX AND I WERE NT BEST FRIENDS. FH IS ALL THAT AND SOME AND I AM THE SAME FOR HIM. WE SHARE EVERYTHING AND OTHERS ARE HAVING A HARD TIME UNDERSTANDING. THAT IS WHY THIS MEANT SO MUCH TO ME.
THANKS AGAIN
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GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME; ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD. WHEN IN DOUBT, PRAY
So true! Thanks....
At least you still have your best friend,mine is only a frind now.When me and FH started going out she said the same thing;i don't have time for her etc. but when she started any relationship she disappeared too.(eyeryone does).She was about to get married then.FH and I have been together 6 yrs and she has called his name once she refers to him as "your friend".I have never disrespected her husband nor ever will,but our frindship has suffered cause I will not tolerate anyone disrespecting my man and I hav told her this.He too is my soulmate i tell him most things(a girl got to keep somethings to herself).We had some trying times but we survive and I know this is for keeps.So thanks again for sharing .
I agree with all you ladies. I tried the being totally honest w/ my fh and I think is has back fired on me. I guess that's why I haven't really been here posting. We are really going through some things and I am statrting to feel like maybe he really isn't the one that was meant for me. That is for another time. They say when you find happiness that when you find out who your true friends are. Thanks Askalot I really needed this and I to am going to print this out and send to my FH.
Southerngirl.....
HEY SHEAWIIL, I'M SORRY 4 WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW. MAYBE THIS IS JUST A COLD FEET ISSUE.YOU KNOW WHEN IT COMES TO MEN, SOME OR MOST HAVE A HARD TIME ACCEPTING SOME THINGS WHEN IT COMES TO THEIR WOMAN. TRY NOT TO WORRY. IT WILL PASS ONE WAY OR THE OTHER. ONLY YOU KNOW DEEP IN YOUR HEART IF HE IS TRULY THE 1, BUT DO NOT MAKE ANY HASTY DECISIONS BASED UPON WHAT YOU ARE FEELING DURING A BAD PATCH. YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS. STAY STRONG.
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GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME; ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD. WHEN IN DOUBT, PRAY
[quote="TAJMOM"]HEY SHEAWIIL, I'M SORRY 4 WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH RIGHT NOW. MAYBE THIS IS JUST A COLD FEET ISSUE.YOU KNOW WHEN IT COMES TO MEN, SOME OR MOST HAVE A HARD TIME ACCEPTING SOME THINGS WHEN IT COMES TO THEIR WOMAN. TRY NOT TO WORRY. IT WILL PASS ONE WAY OR THE OTHER. ONLY YOU KNOW DEEP IN YOUR HEART IF HE IS TRULY THE 1, BUT DO NOT MAKE ANY HASTY DECISIONS BASED UPON WHAT YOU ARE FEELING DURING A BAD PATCH. YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS. STAY STRONG.
[/quote]
Sheawill, this is so very true of what Taj is saying....things are not going to be great, and you know this. My FH and I ave been together 7 years (since my freshman year in college) and we have been tried by fire.....I can actually write a 200-page book on it!....and it is guaranteed that more trials are yet to come...I too get cold feet, I worry, I doubt, I get scared, and I take the little misuderstandings and make them into a molehill....but I also pray, and pray and pray some more....I too feel like the path ahead of me is hidden, but I still trust, and I know what my heart wants...Your faith in the unseen (God Almighty) is what will get you through....and the reward of your faith is what will be your testimony!
Thanks Askalot for the Word of the Lord.
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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Okay, so I just had one of my regular evening conversations with FH, and before we got off the phone to say good night he said...I just wanted to tell you that you mean the world to me...and it was right on time because when I posted the last email above, I was having one of those moments-you know, doubt, worry, asking myself what am I getting into and is this good for me? Well, he told me that because he was reading our book from our engaged couples class in church and it said to make it a habit to say something nice to your future spouse daily, so thats what he chose to say, but it means so much more because he doesn't say things like that often....he is more of an action kind of guy, not a man of many words (something I wish he was more of-but the action is not our time yet) so it was on time for me because it was an answer my prayer today....so what is my point? Its all goes back to this FAITH thing, and my need to walk in it with no worries.....the more I let my mind wander, the more I get upset and worried...The more I focus on GOD'S PROMISE TO ME (dreams of US on our wedding day, marrying a man of God, not being like my mom or her mom before her in hurtful relationships and marrying someone who does appreciate me and respects me FOR me)....and living in that future as if its already here, THEN I can focus on loving GOD, loving myself, and then totally let go by letting someone else love me!
Remember the promises of God, because he is not a man that he should lie! If he told you that its yours, then it already is!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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AMEN Sista!!! Well said.
"I's married now" - "The Color Purple"
Again, you ladies are very, very welcome. I love you ladies!!!! You know a lot of people shut up about things until someone else says it (I admit I am one of those people sometimes). You know what ladies, I just thought of something for me to start a new post. I will do that very, very soon because I have something to tell you ladies.
That was very aspiring!God truly has his hands upon you.Hes using you in a way you might not no,but you r truly a blessing.This may be your ministry that your walking in.LOL
"WHAT GOD HAS FOR ME,It is for me!
June 20,2009 Ill marry my soulmate!
[quote="soon2bride"]That was very aspiring!God truly has his hands upon you.Hes using you in a way you might not no,but you r truly a blessing.This may be your ministry that your walking in.LOL
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Umm, who are you talking to? lol