What are we REALLY talking about here? What are we or wait a minute what should we, ok what area do we support and uplift you in??? I feel pain and confusion and misbelief (on your behalf) all through this post ...and unsure where to direct support and understanding to.
Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?
Evidently we are concerned in some kind of way for you to get the responses you got ...BUT you gotta keep it real with us. We really don't know where to direct prayer. And if you don't wanna tell us what's really good, do you prefer us to just lift your name ...screw the situation/s?
[/quote]
Thank you. It has gotten off track. The man is a so what. Pray for me and my grief. I want to renew my heart. I want to be refreshed and happy. He is gone because he wasnt for me.
This ws my first and last abortion. I took an emergency contraception pill and it didnt work. I rushed to make a decision and I was ashamed. I know you wouldnt understand because of what I did but I did love her. That's way I took the pills. I didnt want her to suffer the D & C. I kow I killed her ad Im so sorry .
JESUS....okay Mycenae1918, please PLEASE go and talk to someone. Do you have counselors at your church, or maybe your Paster, but please go and talk to someone. There seems to be deeper issues going on here that need to be addressed by a professional or someone that can spiritually help guide you in the right direction. Nobody on this site is perfect, nobody's life is perfect, all we can do is offer suggestions and make comments to other's based on our lives and experiences. So while we all are well meaning most of the time when we give those suggestions and comments, there are times where the problem is above what we can just say. Speak with someone that has that expertise and can show you the way. There are many ways God answers prayers, there are many ways God can heal us. He can do it Himself, or can show us where we can go to obtain that healing. Please continue to pray and when you do ask Him to show you which direction you need to take. I will continue praying for you....
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I have spoken to people but most of the time I spend alone because I am ashamed of what I did. I think I will get meds for the winter and resume my therapy. The girls at church are great but when I am greiving I coccon b/c no one wants to be around a whiner. Dont want to drag them down with my pain. Dig?
Mycenae,
I understand that you felt you needed to do what you had, I dont agree with the reasoning though. you have to ask GOD for forgivness and keep going with your life. At this rate that you are going you are going to send yourself to a mental hospital. I know the hurt and pain of having an abortion, all i could do was talk to GOD and ask for his Forgiveness. I know we all handle situations like this differently but you cant keep beating yourself up about it. Just keep looking to GOD and he definitely will get you through this
This ws my first and last abortion. I took an emergency contraception pill and it didnt work. I rushed to make a decision and I was ashamed. I know you wouldnt understand because of what I did but I did love her. That's way I took the pills. I didnt want her to suffer the D & C. I kow I killed her ad Im so sorry .
JESUS....okay Mycenae1918, please PLEASE go and talk to someone. Do you have counselors at your church, or maybe your Paster, but please go and talk to someone. There seems to be deeper issues going on here that need to be addressed by a professional or someone that can spiritually help guide you in the right direction. Nobody on this site is perfect, nobody's life is perfect, all we can do is offer suggestions and make comments to other's based on our lives and experiences. So while we all are well meaning most of the time when we give those suggestions and comments, there are times where the problem is above what we can just say. Speak with someone that has that expertise and can show you the way. There are many ways God answers prayers, there are many ways God can heal us. He can do it Himself, or can show us where we can go to obtain that healing. Please continue to pray and when you do ask Him to show you which direction you need to take. I will continue praying for you....
I have spoken to people but most of the time I spend alone because I am ashamed of what I did. I think I will get meds for the winter and resume my therapy. The girls at church are great but when I am greiving I coccon b/c no one wants to be around a whiner. Dont want to drag them down with my pain. Dig?
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I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
[quote="Turiya"]I wasnt far along but I think she was. She gave me a lot of trouble and girls are hard to carry. I was tired and hungry alot. I miss not ever being able to know her. So I am trying to live a godly life so I can mether in heaven and tell her how sorry I am.
Are you s-e-r-i-o-s-u-s?
Sisters!!! It's time to pray!!!!
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I agree, it's no more time for a whole bunch of questioning because obviously there's ALOT more to this and it won't make sense to us. It's time to all join in prayer....FOR REAL!...this is serious....
A little over a year ago. He reminded me of the pain. That is why I dont talk to people about it because I should be over it by now. When people call or ask me to hang out. I just say I am grieving and I leave it at that. I dont go into to details. they have their own problems.
[quote="mycenae1918"]
how long ago did you have it done?
He reminded me of the pain. [/quote]
There you go!
"Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?"
he wont answer me so I know there is some truth in the information I found. he wont call and tell me the truth or at least email me that he lied. I am not crazy. I wont go to his home. I aint going to jail.
I asked him right out about the situation and I confessed that I had looked him up. I got o reply and I know he must be guilty if he refused to communicatewith me at all? Crazy.
[quote="Turiya"]
how long ago did you have it done?
He reminded me of the pain.
There you go!
"Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?"
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Turiya, just start praying girl. It's more then this one situation, it's obviously deeper then we think or thought. Stop trying to make sense out of it because you are just going to confuse yourself with this situation even more. Ladies let's all touch and agree on this one...Please.....Pray that God will give her the strength and the courage to speak with someone. Someone that can help her work through whatever internal stuff she's going through....
[quote="mycenae1918"]I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
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well first of all remember a miscarriage thru NATURE and an abortion thru CHOICE (if not under medical advisement by a dr.) are 2 seperate entities...
Secondly, if you are so ashamed of what you have done, and cannot forgive yourself, how can you say you renewed your strength in God? If this is so, then you should know that he loves you no matter WHAT and has forgiven you...now in his forgiveness he is not going to erase all of the pain because again, it was YOUR CHOICE-he never said we would not go thru trials, tribulations etc...but he did say he will never leave you nor forsake you...
Thank you all for listening. Ive always had a tendency toward depression so this was a catalyst. Im going to start therapy. Your prayers are certainly apphreciated.
I know my rants about my "fanthom baby" seem crazy to you all but she was someone to me. I didnt protect her like mothers do so I have to learn to deal with that,
[quote="soon2bmsj"]I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
well first of all remember a miscarriage thru NATURE and an abortion thru CHOICE (if not under medical advisement by a dr.) are 2 seperate entities...
Secondly, if you are so ashamed of what you have done, and cannot forgive yourself, how can you say you renewed your strength in God? If this is so, then you should know that he loves you no matter WHAT and has forgiven you...now in his forgiveness he is not going to erase all of the pain because again, it was YOUR CHOICE-he never said we would not go thru trials, tribulations etc...but he did say he will never leave you nor forsake you...
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I know an abortion is a choice so I am too ashamed to talk to a woman who LOST her child. I am wroking on forgiving the young woman that I was when I did it.
The ladies have given you some grat advice. PLEASE take heed to everything that is being said on this forum and most importantly PRAY for a stronger intimate relationship with God because he understands all and will always pick you up when you fall. Work on yourself before putting your self in any other situation.
[quote="mycenae1918"]Thank you all for listening. Ive always had a tendency toward depression so this was a catalyst. Im going to start therapy. Your prayers are certainly apphreciated.
I know my rants about my "fanthom baby" seem crazy to you all but she was someone to me. I didnt protect her like mothers do so I have to learn to deal with that,
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I pray that you will really start back with your therapy. This situation is more then anyone us can help you with. We are here to support you and pray with you, but you have to actually do the work. If you've truly asked, God has forgiven you, now it's time that you forgive yourself. Sometimes we need help learning how to do that and that's okay, it does not make you any weaker then anyone else. We all have our own issue and problems that we deal with as Christians, so don't worry about being judged or critcized by anyone. I must say before I realized the magnitude of what was going on here I judged kinda harshly. I feel bad about doing that and I ask that you forgive me. Like I said before, all of this is deep, I pray you will actually do what you said you will do....
[quote="mycenae1918"]
how long ago did you have it done?
A little over a year ago. He reminded me of the pain. That is why I dont talk to people about it because I should be over it by now. When people call or ask me to hang out. I just say I am grieving and I leave it at that. I dont go into to details. they have their own problems.
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Mycenae, I'm truly sorry for your loss. It sounds like a terrible thing to have gone thru. I studied about RU-486 in college, but hadn't realized that they had legalized it in the U.S. as yet.
The ladies are right about you having to give this all to God and let Him forgive you and give you peace. If you continue to beat yourself up about it, you will make yourself sick. I think that you're wrong in thinking that you should be "over it by now." I don't know how many weeks you were pregnant but this was the loss of a child to whom you were obviously very connected. Anyone that experiences death never is completely over it. They just try to live one day at a time. That's what you should do..take it one day at a time. Take time to love and appreciate yourself. Instead of trying to help this person and that person right now...running around trying to be a good MOH and such..take time to take care of you. If you were to marry now, you'd have to think about taking care of your husband and you. Right now you just need to pay attention to yourself.
I wholehartedly agree that you should get back into therapy...and a Christian therapist is even better than one who isn't Christian because a Christian therapist will also seek God and the teachings of Jesus Christ to help you. You can't do this without GOD.
Just know that it won't always be like this. God has wonderful blessings in store for you. Although it may be difficult to see right now, you will be very happy again.
Im trying to stay busy. I had Christian counselor and it was going well. RU-486 is toxic. I had so many illinesses and infections in the months after I took it that it is not funny. But, I lived thorough it some women bleed to death or die from infection later.
I spoke to him today. He says it is not true. That they lived together at the old place but nothing is going on at the moment. I will wait and see if he calls me or runs and hides.
OH MY GOSH CYNAE, first and foremost, you must learn to forgive yourself. You also need some spiritual counseling as well. Sister, I believe with all my heart that God has already forgiven you of a decision made in a confused state. God will show you how if you ask him. Let him help you as he's the only on who can. Take it to him.
A lot needed to happen before you returned to him (your fiance). You were hurting and you became distrustful. Of course you couldn't trust him because here you are pregnant and the child's father rejected you and you were very depressed. I can certainly understand that. You truly need to speak with someone sugar. I'm so very sorry for your continued pain and until you speak with someone and forgive yourself most of all and then eventually forgive your fiance, you truly can't move on. All the other stuff are child's play. If you truly wanted to, you could've sorted that out, but I get the feeling that you don't even want to. You need to learn to forgive yourself and to forgive him in order to be totally healthy and then you could truly move on.
I will keep you in my prayers, forever uplifted, but you don't have to leave just because you're no longer getting married. That's what's great about our sisterhood. Yes, this is a wedding website, but we changed it to an everything sisterhood. So stay.
Well, it could be worse a co-worker confided in me that she had had 2 miscarriages in the past six months. And a D&C alone at the clinic. I xeroxed some verses and stories from my woman's Bible and gave them to her.
I never told her of my pain. I think I helped her with her pain though.
[quote="Ginoue"]OH MY GOSH CYNAE, first and foremost, you must learn to forgive yourself. You also need some spiritual counseling as well. Sister, I believe with all my heart that God has already forgiven you of a decision made in a confused state. God will show you how if you ask him. Let him help you as he's the only on who can. Take it to him.
A lot needed to happen before you returned to him (your fiance). You were hurting and you became distrustful. Of course you couldn't trust him because here you are pregnant and the child's father rejected you and you were very depressed. I can certainly understand that. You truly need to speak with someone sugar. I'm so very sorry for your continued pain and until you speak with someone and forgive yourself most of all and then eventually forgive your fiance, you truly can't move on. All the other stuff are child's play. If you truly wanted to, you could've sorted that out, but I get the feeling that you don't even want to. You need to learn to forgive yourself and to forgive him in order to be totally healthy and then you could truly move on.
I will keep you in my prayers, forever uplifted, but you don't have to leave just because you're no longer getting married. That's what's great about our sisterhood. Yes, this is a wedding website, but we changed it to an everything sisterhood. So stay.
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Oh thank you. I will pop in from time to time. With GOOD news. LOL
Im sorry i dont pull punches it just not my style can we say cybil.
shoot i need meds just to keep up with this post please take ginoues advice work on forgiving yourself and getting the professional help u so desperately need as well as spiritual.work on you so that your next guy will truely be able to love and appreciate the new and improved you.
Besides the fact that I have read this post and I usually don't respond to your post because they usually have me lost anyway I really wish you luck. I guess I will be sad for you to go since you were like a really good soap opera when you miss a day or two. But I will definitely pray for you.
Where do you live please please please tell because what kind of doctor sends you home to abort by yourself that is cruel? I have so many questions but many of them have been asked already and ignored so I guess it's not use.
Okay my sisters since there is a prayer party going on in the corner I have some fried chicken, baked macaroni, greens, candied yams and some dinner rolls I will be over in a minute when I get the KOOl Aid out the freezer.
I dont purposely ignore questions. I am sorry if I ignored you. My life isnt a soap opera. I dont lie. Many women are hurting the same way I am but you dont know it. My co-workers dont know.
My story is completely true. The abortion clinic dispenses RU-486 and antibiotics. The RU-486 ends the pregnancy by cutting off the hormones that support the developing embryo. the give you a second drug the causethe uterus to contract. The second drug you place in your cheek or swallow the next morning. It is similiar to a miscrriage I was told.
In two weeks you go back to make sure the abortion is complete if not you may have to get a surgical abortion.
I dont feel comfortable saying what area I live in. I live in the Eastern US.
But, on a lighter note between the girls at church and my friends I havent been able to stay in the house and I am feeling better. The guy is gone. He hasnt calld since I confronted him and I know it's true now.
So, I have many plans for the coming week end and for the future :)
[quote="mycenae1918"]I dont purposely ignore questions. I am sorry if I ignored you. My life isnt a soap opera. I dont lie. Many women are hurting the same way I am but you dont know it. My co-workers dont know.
My story is completely true. The abortion clinic dispenses RU-486 and antibiotics. The RU-486 ends the pregnancy by cutting off the hormones that support the developing embryo. the give you a second drug the causethe uterus to contract. The second drug you place in your cheek or swallow the next morning. It is similiar to a miscrriage I was told.
In two weeks you go back to make sure the abortion is complete if not you may have to get a surgical abortion.
I dont feel comfortable saying what area I live in. I live in the Eastern US.
But, on a lighter note between the girls at church and my friends I havent been able to stay in the house and I am feeling better. The guy is gone. He hasnt calld since I confronted him and I know it's true now.
So, I have many plans for the coming week end and for the future :)
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1. You have issues that you need to deal with.
2. You are attracted to drama. Though you really don't know you are.
Please believe that working on yourself is something you have to do everyday for the rest of your life. And I can attest to that! There is not a day in life that you are going to wake up and say: I am complete! I think I can find a man now. It doesn't work like that.
Healing comes in layers, but once a wound appears, it never heals in the way so it will look like nothing is there. We always will have a "scar". The key is to live as if the scar really isn't there. Its not like you're faking your pain, but its letting Satan know that you are defined by what you MAKE IT THROUGH...Not by the actual scars. The way you do this is by making better choices, not by re-living the same mistakes over and over again. Life is too short. There are no second chances ALL THE TIME! And please believe just because someone comes back in your life, its not always God saying try it again. Sometimes its God saying, "Don't forget what you went through!"
So you have to remember that people may change, but its not always enough to make things better the next time. You did not use discernment....Sure the SPIRIT BEEN TOLD you not to trust this guy, but you ignored it, and here you are. But NOW- its good to listen to the Spirit, but you are so broken now.
I remember when you got engaged, you even fooled yourself AND US into thinking that this guy was a great guy, and now I think you wanted US to CONVINCE you that you were NOT making a mistake (so you left out these important details), when ONLY YOU knew already the potential danger that lay ahead. One thing about God is that he never wraps an evil thing in a beautiful covering...Thats what Satan does, so don't ever think that a man who is giving you warning signals in the back of your mind will "be okay", and that you have jitters! My Goodness THATS why you hesitated to accept his proposal! And here we were just pushing you to do it.
But see, God is NOT that COMPLEX. Most things are plain and simple. Your discernment and spiritual self tells you this.
Finally, don't create scenarios in your mind...This person can very well be his sister he is working and buying investment properties here and there. Check marriage or dissolution of marriage records, and always get the facts STRAIGHT. The last thing a Queen does is act on information that is possibly faulty and has holes. Queens work on just the facts, and even though it may be true (and he MAY BE actually married), you are not really sure of that yourself because you don't have solid proof!
Why do you think it takes so long to convict criminals of crime? The investigators never use heresay or faulty logic and "sources" that can easily be shot down!
I know it. You are so right. He denies it all and apologized over and over for the abortion situation. I emailed him my evidence. The information I found and the websites that I found it at. So, I will see if he is really telling the truth by his actions. I am to old for this madness. But, I am chill and trying just trust in the Lord to make my path straight. I'll let you all know if anything new comes up.
beautifully said bumblebee hell i thought i was crazy too for a min.
mycenae i dont think you were being called a liar she was simply reminding u of somethings you said or have u forgotten try going back and reading some of your post your own words and please tell me how on gods green earth do you not feel comfortable tell what state u live in but you can air all of your business on a web site,hell yes i think ur living in a galaxy far away in the eastern part or either in a mental institute and Mrs 080908 iam pleased that u know ur azz is joining us in this here corner bring the red kool-aid too
[quote="PEBBLES35"] please tell me how on gods green earth do you not feel comfortable tell what state u live in but you can air all of your business on a web site
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I was just thinking the same thing. I'm a little confused. For what good reason can you not display were you are? Unless you know whatever you tell us is gonna be a lie. I wonder If anything you are telling us is true. To be honest I think it's all a lie. With that said I will no longer waist my precious time to respond to this dumb post ever again. May GOD be with you sista.
That's fine. I am doing better. Spending time with my friends from church etc. I am not lying but I wont contest what you are saying. Thank you for your prayers. Take care.
No we don't know. You never disclosed your location before this situation unfolded so we know you're not disclosing your information soley for that reason.
If you don't want to thats okay, its your right. No one even asked who or where you live (at least I don't think anyone did). So at the same time, no one here is going to look you up if they knew what city you lived in either. Your screen name and city is not enough to find out where you are.....nor is anyone here willing to put in that kind of time. I think the idea of hiding who you are is a little shady, as most people have been honest about themselves. Plus people who live near each other always contact each other privately via notes and all. So its a little off-putting when you are here basically hiding, especially when people just want to understand your situation and pray for you. When you put the truth out in pieces, or are not up front when you need to be, then how can anyone be willing to help? Cause it took a while for you to let this out. Especially when you KNEW all this from GO.
I'm just guarded like that. Always have been. I mean I give up my social secutiy number before my location. I didnt want to bother other people with this. I mean it's not "A Million Little Pieces" the guy who lied about having the root canal with no novocaine on Oprah.
In the east at the Planned Parenthood they dispense RU-486 and the other meds that make you uterus contract and give you a prescription for tylenol with codiene and an anti-nausea medication and send you on your way. It's called a medical abortion. I bleed of and on for a month.
I mean in some cases I am open. I went to speak to some teenage girls about my post abortive grief. I sent you a note about it. I testified in front of the legislature.
I mean I cant say anything to make anyone believe me but I appreciate your prayers. :)
I put myself out there for the girls so maybe they wont feel the pain I do. I just wanted them to know that emergency contraception and abortions arent the answer.
Play nice guys. It is confusing, but we offered our advice and whether it was taken or not is not an issue. I don't want to have to enlarge the corner and remove bathroom privileges but... lol
Let's continue to pray for guidance and forgiveness and move the fuck on!
IM GONNA SAY THIS AND THEN LEAVE THIS POST ALONE.
What the hell does that have to do with what bumblebee said?
I think your crazy, crazy as all hell as a matter of fact,I think your living in your own little fantasy world with purple moons green horses and black clouds,get back on your meds get some professional help.Ok rosetta
[quote="PEBBLES35"]IM GONNA SAY THIS AND THEN LEAVE THIS POST ALONE.
What the hell does that have to do with what bumblebee said?
I think your crazy, crazy as all hell as a matter of fact,I think your living in your own little fantasy world with purple moons green horses and black clouds,get back on your meds get some professional help.Ok rosetta
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I see you Pebbles!
Now that I said that I'm like the Monopoly Game: Pebbles, Go straight to the corner, don't pass GO, do not collect 200 dollars! LOL
But really Mycenae, I understand your intentions to help others. And maybe in helping others, thats how you kind of minister to yourself. Hey I do that often! I encourage myself through helping others. But really giving your social before your location seems weird, but you are in our prayers. Your wedding input and advice can also help others so don't stay too far away, God Bless.
now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never got out, ive got my cable, blow up mattress and no kids hell im never comming out.
[quote="PEBBLES35"]now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never out ive got my cable blow up mattress no kids hell im never comming out.
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[quote="PEBBLES35"]now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never got out, ive got my cable, blow up mattress and no kids hell im never comming out.
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Yeah Pebbles you hang in there with your sleeping bag, extra supplies (hair needs, extra clothes, snacks, George Foreman grill just in case, cell phone charger) cause you're going to be in there for a minute! LOL
WOW. I had a grat weekend with friends. I never heard from my ex-fiance so I guess at that I found out about him is true. I am not sad over him.
I have decided to commit to therapy again and stay the course with it. I have been praying three times a day or so and just looking to God to help me heal.
Pebbles. I think they say never to tell a person that he or she is crazy. I am really in pain and those type of comments are not helpful to me. I will keep you in prayer. Talk soon.
[quote="Rosetta"]Play nice guys. It is confusing, but we offered our advice and whether it was taken or not is not an issue. I don't want to have to enlarge the corner and remove bathroom privileges but... lol
Let's continue to pray for guidance and forgiveness and move the *bleep* on!
[/quote]
%100 agree Rosetta....I think it's about time we let this post go....
[quote="Turiya"]Mycenae1918!
What are we REALLY talking about here? What are we or wait a minute what should we, ok what area do we support and uplift you in??? I feel pain and confusion and misbelief (on your behalf) all through this post ...and unsure where to direct support and understanding to.
Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?
Evidently we are concerned in some kind of way for you to get the responses you got ...BUT you gotta keep it real with us. We really don't know where to direct prayer. And if you don't wanna tell us what's really good, do you prefer us to just lift your name ...screw the situation/s?
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Thank you. It has gotten off track. The man is a so what. Pray for me and my grief. I want to renew my heart. I want to be refreshed and happy. He is gone because he wasnt for me.
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[quote="soontobebride"]
This ws my first and last abortion. I took an emergency contraception pill and it didnt work. I rushed to make a decision and I was ashamed. I know you wouldnt understand because of what I did but I did love her. That's way I took the pills. I didnt want her to suffer the D & C. I kow I killed her ad Im so sorry .
JESUS....okay Mycenae1918, please PLEASE go and talk to someone. Do you have counselors at your church, or maybe your Paster, but please go and talk to someone. There seems to be deeper issues going on here that need to be addressed by a professional or someone that can spiritually help guide you in the right direction. Nobody on this site is perfect, nobody's life is perfect, all we can do is offer suggestions and make comments to other's based on our lives and experiences. So while we all are well meaning most of the time when we give those suggestions and comments, there are times where the problem is above what we can just say. Speak with someone that has that expertise and can show you the way. There are many ways God answers prayers, there are many ways God can heal us. He can do it Himself, or can show us where we can go to obtain that healing. Please continue to pray and when you do ask Him to show you which direction you need to take. I will continue praying for you....
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I have spoken to people but most of the time I spend alone because I am ashamed of what I did. I think I will get meds for the winter and resume my therapy. The girls at church are great but when I am greiving I coccon b/c no one wants to be around a whiner. Dont want to drag them down with my pain. Dig?
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Mycenae,
I understand that you felt you needed to do what you had, I dont agree with the reasoning though. you have to ask GOD for forgivness and keep going with your life. At this rate that you are going you are going to send yourself to a mental hospital. I know the hurt and pain of having an abortion, all i could do was talk to GOD and ask for his Forgiveness. I know we all handle situations like this differently but you cant keep beating yourself up about it. Just keep looking to GOD and he definitely will get you through this
[quote="mycenae1918"]
This ws my first and last abortion. I took an emergency contraception pill and it didnt work. I rushed to make a decision and I was ashamed. I know you wouldnt understand because of what I did but I did love her. That's way I took the pills. I didnt want her to suffer the D & C. I kow I killed her ad Im so sorry .
JESUS....okay Mycenae1918, please PLEASE go and talk to someone. Do you have counselors at your church, or maybe your Paster, but please go and talk to someone. There seems to be deeper issues going on here that need to be addressed by a professional or someone that can spiritually help guide you in the right direction. Nobody on this site is perfect, nobody's life is perfect, all we can do is offer suggestions and make comments to other's based on our lives and experiences. So while we all are well meaning most of the time when we give those suggestions and comments, there are times where the problem is above what we can just say. Speak with someone that has that expertise and can show you the way. There are many ways God answers prayers, there are many ways God can heal us. He can do it Himself, or can show us where we can go to obtain that healing. Please continue to pray and when you do ask Him to show you which direction you need to take. I will continue praying for you....
I have spoken to people but most of the time I spend alone because I am ashamed of what I did. I think I will get meds for the winter and resume my therapy. The girls at church are great but when I am greiving I coccon b/c no one wants to be around a whiner. Dont want to drag them down with my pain. Dig?
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how long ago did you have it done?
I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
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[quote="Turiya"]I wasnt far along but I think she was. She gave me a lot of trouble and girls are hard to carry. I was tired and hungry alot. I miss not ever being able to know her. So I am trying to live a godly life so I can mether in heaven and tell her how sorry I am.
Are you s-e-r-i-o-s-u-s?
Sisters!!! It's time to pray!!!!
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I agree, it's no more time for a whole bunch of questioning because obviously there's ALOT more to this and it won't make sense to us. It's time to all join in prayer....FOR REAL!...this is serious....
how long ago did you have it done?
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A little over a year ago. He reminded me of the pain. That is why I dont talk to people about it because I should be over it by now. When people call or ask me to hang out. I just say I am grieving and I leave it at that. I dont go into to details. they have their own problems.
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[quote="mycenae1918"]
how long ago did you have it done?
He reminded me of the pain. [/quote]
There you go!
"Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?"
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he wont answer me so I know there is some truth in the information I found. he wont call and tell me the truth or at least email me that he lied. I am not crazy. I wont go to his home. I aint going to jail.
I asked him right out about the situation and I confessed that I had looked him up. I got o reply and I know he must be guilty if he refused to communicatewith me at all? Crazy.
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[quote="Turiya"]
how long ago did you have it done?
He reminded me of the pain.
There you go!
"Are YOU feeling "a certain kinda way" because you are now BACK with the guy that YOU told yourself you would NEVER deal with again because you had to go to the abortion clinic alone in the rain, then sit for hours with ginger ale and cookies in pain while you poison yalls child? Now you need a reason to get out of this whole situation again because you said you would never put yourself in this place after the first situation?"
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Turiya, just start praying girl. It's more then this one situation, it's obviously deeper then we think or thought. Stop trying to make sense out of it because you are just going to confuse yourself with this situation even more. Ladies let's all touch and agree on this one...Please.....Pray that God will give her the strength and the courage to speak with someone. Someone that can help her work through whatever internal stuff she's going through....
[quote="mycenae1918"]I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
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well first of all remember a miscarriage thru NATURE and an abortion thru CHOICE (if not under medical advisement by a dr.) are 2 seperate entities...
Secondly, if you are so ashamed of what you have done, and cannot forgive yourself, how can you say you renewed your strength in God? If this is so, then you should know that he loves you no matter WHAT and has forgiven you...now in his forgiveness he is not going to erase all of the pain because again, it was YOUR CHOICE-he never said we would not go thru trials, tribulations etc...but he did say he will never leave you nor forsake you...
Thank you all for listening. Ive always had a tendency toward depression so this was a catalyst. Im going to start therapy. Your prayers are certainly apphreciated.
I know my rants about my "fanthom baby" seem crazy to you all but she was someone to me. I didnt protect her like mothers do so I have to learn to deal with that,
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[quote="soon2bmsj"]I know that is why I kept it to myself. I know my friends etc dont want to hear me whine about it all the time. It's was just a lonely two weeks from finding out to having it done. I grieve for myself to. It was all so hurtful. I usually just take some sedatives and sleep. I know I made the decsion and I did what I did so I dont ask for sympathy. People always say talk to people who have had misscarriages etc but I am too ashamed.
well first of all remember a miscarriage thru NATURE and an abortion thru CHOICE (if not under medical advisement by a dr.) are 2 seperate entities...
Secondly, if you are so ashamed of what you have done, and cannot forgive yourself, how can you say you renewed your strength in God? If this is so, then you should know that he loves you no matter WHAT and has forgiven you...now in his forgiveness he is not going to erase all of the pain because again, it was YOUR CHOICE-he never said we would not go thru trials, tribulations etc...but he did say he will never leave you nor forsake you...
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I know an abortion is a choice so I am too ashamed to talk to a woman who LOST her child. I am wroking on forgiving the young woman that I was when I did it.
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I'm praying
Praying for you ....
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The ladies have given you some grat advice. PLEASE take heed to everything that is being said on this forum and most importantly PRAY for a stronger intimate relationship with God because he understands all and will always pick you up when you fall. Work on yourself before putting your self in any other situation.
Remember To Always Be Fabulous!!!
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[quote="mycenae1918"]Thank you all for listening. Ive always had a tendency toward depression so this was a catalyst. Im going to start therapy. Your prayers are certainly apphreciated.
I know my rants about my "fanthom baby" seem crazy to you all but she was someone to me. I didnt protect her like mothers do so I have to learn to deal with that,
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I pray that you will really start back with your therapy. This situation is more then anyone us can help you with. We are here to support you and pray with you, but you have to actually do the work. If you've truly asked, God has forgiven you, now it's time that you forgive yourself. Sometimes we need help learning how to do that and that's okay, it does not make you any weaker then anyone else. We all have our own issue and problems that we deal with as Christians, so don't worry about being judged or critcized by anyone. I must say before I realized the magnitude of what was going on here I judged kinda harshly. I feel bad about doing that and I ask that you forgive me. Like I said before, all of this is deep, I pray you will actually do what you said you will do....
I'm also praying for you.
oh, you all are fine. there's nothing to forgive. You said what you thought with the info you had.
Ive some growing to do now. I think I learned so much from all of this.
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i even want to forgive him :)
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[quote="mycenae1918"]
how long ago did you have it done?
A little over a year ago. He reminded me of the pain. That is why I dont talk to people about it because I should be over it by now. When people call or ask me to hang out. I just say I am grieving and I leave it at that. I dont go into to details. they have their own problems.
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Mycenae, I'm truly sorry for your loss. It sounds like a terrible thing to have gone thru. I studied about RU-486 in college, but hadn't realized that they had legalized it in the U.S. as yet.
The ladies are right about you having to give this all to God and let Him forgive you and give you peace. If you continue to beat yourself up about it, you will make yourself sick. I think that you're wrong in thinking that you should be "over it by now." I don't know how many weeks you were pregnant but this was the loss of a child to whom you were obviously very connected. Anyone that experiences death never is completely over it. They just try to live one day at a time. That's what you should do..take it one day at a time. Take time to love and appreciate yourself. Instead of trying to help this person and that person right now...running around trying to be a good MOH and such..take time to take care of you. If you were to marry now, you'd have to think about taking care of your husband and you. Right now you just need to pay attention to yourself.
I wholehartedly agree that you should get back into therapy...and a Christian therapist is even better than one who isn't Christian because a Christian therapist will also seek God and the teachings of Jesus Christ to help you. You can't do this without GOD.
Just know that it won't always be like this. God has wonderful blessings in store for you. Although it may be difficult to see right now, you will be very happy again.
Prayer, peace, and love to you, sis.
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Im trying to stay busy. I had Christian counselor and it was going well. RU-486 is toxic. I had so many illinesses and infections in the months after I took it that it is not funny. But, I lived thorough it some women bleed to death or die from infection later.
I spoke to him today. He says it is not true. That they lived together at the old place but nothing is going on at the moment. I will wait and see if he calls me or runs and hides.
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I am focusing on being happy and putting God first. It's hard but I will be fine.
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OH MY GOSH CYNAE, first and foremost, you must learn to forgive yourself. You also need some spiritual counseling as well. Sister, I believe with all my heart that God has already forgiven you of a decision made in a confused state. God will show you how if you ask him. Let him help you as he's the only on who can. Take it to him.
A lot needed to happen before you returned to him (your fiance). You were hurting and you became distrustful. Of course you couldn't trust him because here you are pregnant and the child's father rejected you and you were very depressed. I can certainly understand that. You truly need to speak with someone sugar. I'm so very sorry for your continued pain and until you speak with someone and forgive yourself most of all and then eventually forgive your fiance, you truly can't move on. All the other stuff are child's play. If you truly wanted to, you could've sorted that out, but I get the feeling that you don't even want to. You need to learn to forgive yourself and to forgive him in order to be totally healthy and then you could truly move on.
I will keep you in my prayers, forever uplifted, but you don't have to leave just because you're no longer getting married. That's what's great about our sisterhood. Yes, this is a wedding website, but we changed it to an everything sisterhood. So stay.
Well, it could be worse a co-worker confided in me that she had had 2 miscarriages in the past six months. And a D&C alone at the clinic. I xeroxed some verses and stories from my woman's Bible and gave them to her.
I never told her of my pain. I think I helped her with her pain though.
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[quote="Ginoue"]OH MY GOSH CYNAE, first and foremost, you must learn to forgive yourself. You also need some spiritual counseling as well. Sister, I believe with all my heart that God has already forgiven you of a decision made in a confused state. God will show you how if you ask him. Let him help you as he's the only on who can. Take it to him.
A lot needed to happen before you returned to him (your fiance). You were hurting and you became distrustful. Of course you couldn't trust him because here you are pregnant and the child's father rejected you and you were very depressed. I can certainly understand that. You truly need to speak with someone sugar. I'm so very sorry for your continued pain and until you speak with someone and forgive yourself most of all and then eventually forgive your fiance, you truly can't move on. All the other stuff are child's play. If you truly wanted to, you could've sorted that out, but I get the feeling that you don't even want to. You need to learn to forgive yourself and to forgive him in order to be totally healthy and then you could truly move on.
I will keep you in my prayers, forever uplifted, but you don't have to leave just because you're no longer getting married. That's what's great about our sisterhood. Yes, this is a wedding website, but we changed it to an everything sisterhood. So stay.
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Oh thank you. I will pop in from time to time. With GOOD news. LOL
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Im sorry i dont pull punches it just not my style can we say cybil.
shoot i need meds just to keep up with this post please take ginoues advice work on forgiving yourself and getting the professional help u so desperately need as well as spiritual.work on you so that your next guy will truely be able to love and appreciate the new and improved you.
mycenae, good luck with everything. I wish you the best.
Besides the fact that I have read this post and I usually don't respond to your post because they usually have me lost anyway I really wish you luck. I guess I will be sad for you to go since you were like a really good soap opera when you miss a day or two. But I will definitely pray for you.
Where do you live please please please tell because what kind of doctor sends you home to abort by yourself that is cruel? I have so many questions but many of them have been asked already and ignored so I guess it's not use.
Okay my sisters since there is a prayer party going on in the corner I have some fried chicken, baked macaroni, greens, candied yams and some dinner rolls I will be over in a minute when I get the KOOl Aid out the freezer.
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I dont purposely ignore questions. I am sorry if I ignored you. My life isnt a soap opera. I dont lie. Many women are hurting the same way I am but you dont know it. My co-workers dont know.
My story is completely true. The abortion clinic dispenses RU-486 and antibiotics. The RU-486 ends the pregnancy by cutting off the hormones that support the developing embryo. the give you a second drug the causethe uterus to contract. The second drug you place in your cheek or swallow the next morning. It is similiar to a miscrriage I was told.
In two weeks you go back to make sure the abortion is complete if not you may have to get a surgical abortion.
I dont feel comfortable saying what area I live in. I live in the Eastern US.
But, on a lighter note between the girls at church and my friends I havent been able to stay in the house and I am feeling better. The guy is gone. He hasnt calld since I confronted him and I know it's true now.
So, I have many plans for the coming week end and for the future :)
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[quote="mycenae1918"]I dont purposely ignore questions. I am sorry if I ignored you. My life isnt a soap opera. I dont lie. Many women are hurting the same way I am but you dont know it. My co-workers dont know.
My story is completely true. The abortion clinic dispenses RU-486 and antibiotics. The RU-486 ends the pregnancy by cutting off the hormones that support the developing embryo. the give you a second drug the causethe uterus to contract. The second drug you place in your cheek or swallow the next morning. It is similiar to a miscrriage I was told.
In two weeks you go back to make sure the abortion is complete if not you may have to get a surgical abortion.
I dont feel comfortable saying what area I live in. I live in the Eastern US.
But, on a lighter note between the girls at church and my friends I havent been able to stay in the house and I am feeling better. The guy is gone. He hasnt calld since I confronted him and I know it's true now.
So, I have many plans for the coming week end and for the future :)
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I wish you luck! stay strong and faithful!!
Many of the women stated some true facts:
1. You have issues that you need to deal with.
2. You are attracted to drama. Though you really don't know you are.
Please believe that working on yourself is something you have to do everyday for the rest of your life. And I can attest to that! There is not a day in life that you are going to wake up and say: I am complete! I think I can find a man now. It doesn't work like that.
Healing comes in layers, but once a wound appears, it never heals in the way so it will look like nothing is there. We always will have a "scar". The key is to live as if the scar really isn't there. Its not like you're faking your pain, but its letting Satan know that you are defined by what you MAKE IT THROUGH...Not by the actual scars. The way you do this is by making better choices, not by re-living the same mistakes over and over again. Life is too short. There are no second chances ALL THE TIME! And please believe just because someone comes back in your life, its not always God saying try it again. Sometimes its God saying, "Don't forget what you went through!"
So you have to remember that people may change, but its not always enough to make things better the next time. You did not use discernment....Sure the SPIRIT BEEN TOLD you not to trust this guy, but you ignored it, and here you are. But NOW- its good to listen to the Spirit, but you are so broken now.
I remember when you got engaged, you even fooled yourself AND US into thinking that this guy was a great guy, and now I think you wanted US to CONVINCE you that you were NOT making a mistake (so you left out these important details), when ONLY YOU knew already the potential danger that lay ahead. One thing about God is that he never wraps an evil thing in a beautiful covering...Thats what Satan does, so don't ever think that a man who is giving you warning signals in the back of your mind will "be okay", and that you have jitters! My Goodness THATS why you hesitated to accept his proposal! And here we were just pushing you to do it.
But see, God is NOT that COMPLEX. Most things are plain and simple. Your discernment and spiritual self tells you this.
Finally, don't create scenarios in your mind...This person can very well be his sister he is working and buying investment properties here and there. Check marriage or dissolution of marriage records, and always get the facts STRAIGHT. The last thing a Queen does is act on information that is possibly faulty and has holes. Queens work on just the facts, and even though it may be true (and he MAY BE actually married), you are not really sure of that yourself because you don't have solid proof!
Why do you think it takes so long to convict criminals of crime? The investigators never use heresay or faulty logic and "sources" that can easily be shot down!
You are definitely in our prayers.....!
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I know it. You are so right. He denies it all and apologized over and over for the abortion situation. I emailed him my evidence. The information I found and the websites that I found it at. So, I will see if he is really telling the truth by his actions. I am to old for this madness. But, I am chill and trying just trust in the Lord to make my path straight. I'll let you all know if anything new comes up.
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Bumble my sister, you have ministered! Beautiful. Be encouraged Mycenae.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
beautifully said bumblebee hell i thought i was crazy too for a min.
mycenae i dont think you were being called a liar she was simply reminding u of somethings you said or have u forgotten try going back and reading some of your post your own words and please tell me how on gods green earth do you not feel comfortable tell what state u live in but you can air all of your business on a web site,hell yes i think ur living in a galaxy far away in the eastern part or either in a mental institute and Mrs 080908 iam pleased that u know ur azz is joining us in this here corner bring the red kool-aid too
[quote="PEBBLES35"] please tell me how on gods green earth do you not feel comfortable tell what state u live in but you can air all of your business on a web site
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I was just thinking the same thing. I'm a little confused. For what good reason can you not display were you are? Unless you know whatever you tell us is gonna be a lie. I wonder If anything you are telling us is true. To be honest I think it's all a lie. With that said I will no longer waist my precious time to respond to this dumb post ever again. May GOD be with you sista.
That's fine. I am doing better. Spending time with my friends from church etc. I am not lying but I wont contest what you are saying. Thank you for your prayers. Take care.
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It's because I have aired my business that I dont want to say exactly what state I live in. You know?
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No we don't know. You never disclosed your location before this situation unfolded so we know you're not disclosing your information soley for that reason.
If you don't want to thats okay, its your right. No one even asked who or where you live (at least I don't think anyone did). So at the same time, no one here is going to look you up if they knew what city you lived in either. Your screen name and city is not enough to find out where you are.....nor is anyone here willing to put in that kind of time. I think the idea of hiding who you are is a little shady, as most people have been honest about themselves. Plus people who live near each other always contact each other privately via notes and all. So its a little off-putting when you are here basically hiding, especially when people just want to understand your situation and pray for you. When you put the truth out in pieces, or are not up front when you need to be, then how can anyone be willing to help? Cause it took a while for you to let this out. Especially when you KNEW all this from GO.
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I'm just guarded like that. Always have been. I mean I give up my social secutiy number before my location. I didnt want to bother other people with this. I mean it's not "A Million Little Pieces" the guy who lied about having the root canal with no novocaine on Oprah.
In the east at the Planned Parenthood they dispense RU-486 and the other meds that make you uterus contract and give you a prescription for tylenol with codiene and an anti-nausea medication and send you on your way. It's called a medical abortion. I bleed of and on for a month.
I mean in some cases I am open. I went to speak to some teenage girls about my post abortive grief. I sent you a note about it. I testified in front of the legislature.
I mean I cant say anything to make anyone believe me but I appreciate your prayers. :)
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I put myself out there for the girls so maybe they wont feel the pain I do. I just wanted them to know that emergency contraception and abortions arent the answer.
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Play nice guys. It is confusing, but we offered our advice and whether it was taken or not is not an issue. I don't want to have to enlarge the corner and remove bathroom privileges but... lol
Let's continue to pray for guidance and forgiveness and move the fuck on!
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IM GONNA SAY THIS AND THEN LEAVE THIS POST ALONE.
What the hell does that have to do with what bumblebee said?
I think your crazy, crazy as all hell as a matter of fact,I think your living in your own little fantasy world with purple moons green horses and black clouds,get back on your meds get some professional help.Ok rosetta
[quote="PEBBLES35"]IM GONNA SAY THIS AND THEN LEAVE THIS POST ALONE.
What the hell does that have to do with what bumblebee said?
I think your crazy, crazy as all hell as a matter of fact,I think your living in your own little fantasy world with purple moons green horses and black clouds,get back on your meds get some professional help.Ok rosetta
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I see you Pebbles!
Now that I said that I'm like the Monopoly Game: Pebbles, Go straight to the corner, don't pass GO, do not collect 200 dollars! LOL
But really Mycenae, I understand your intentions to help others. And maybe in helping others, thats how you kind of minister to yourself. Hey I do that often! I encourage myself through helping others. But really giving your social before your location seems weird, but you are in our prayers. Your wedding input and advice can also help others so don't stay too far away, God Bless.
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never got out, ive got my cable, blow up mattress and no kids hell im never comming out.
You ladies are too much
[quote="PEBBLES35"]now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never out ive got my cable blow up mattress no kids hell im never comming out.
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rotflmbao
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[quote="PEBBLES35"]now bumblebee Ive been in the corner since one of her other post i never got out, ive got my cable, blow up mattress and no kids hell im never comming out.
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Yeah Pebbles you hang in there with your sleeping bag, extra supplies (hair needs, extra clothes, snacks, George Foreman grill just in case, cell phone charger) cause you're going to be in there for a minute! LOL
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
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WOW. I had a grat weekend with friends. I never heard from my ex-fiance so I guess at that I found out about him is true. I am not sad over him.
I have decided to commit to therapy again and stay the course with it. I have been praying three times a day or so and just looking to God to help me heal.
Pebbles. I think they say never to tell a person that he or she is crazy. I am really in pain and those type of comments are not helpful to me. I will keep you in prayer. Talk soon.
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[quote="Rosetta"]Play nice guys. It is confusing, but we offered our advice and whether it was taken or not is not an issue. I don't want to have to enlarge the corner and remove bathroom privileges but... lol
Let's continue to pray for guidance and forgiveness and move the *bleep* on!
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%100 agree Rosetta....I think it's about time we let this post go....
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