TRADITION

If I didn't learn anything but this one thing; people find it very hard to accept the unconventional, but are more reliant on tradition. I, am not one to follow tradition, especially when viewing all of the bridal magazines which focus on personalized weddings at the choice of the bride and groom. I was told today that I needed to choose a Matron of Honor. I don't have one, and don't want one. The only friend standing in my wedding is from CA; all the rest are my fiance's siblings and friends. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't like them. I have this thing about closeness, friends and so forth. Anyway, I was upset at the fact that it seems as if I'm being pressured to make a decision that I'm totally uncomfortable with. I've decived to ignore the request, and go on with everything, after all, it's not what others want, it's suppose to be for me.

I had another relative telling me that the girls shoes had to be the same. If you read and review Bridal Magazines, you'll see that it is color that stays in code with the rules rather than style. She doesn't get it, and refuses to accept this. Another problem that I will have is the assignment of the wedding party to walk with his or her assigned person; I don't care about the height and all of that.

People don't realize it, but it's the small things like this that drive a Bride to being a Bridezilla. Everyone says it's your day, but its actually something that they try to turn into their day.

Weddings are something that have evolved over time. Nothing is the same and even if it is, who says you can't do what you want to do? People have to learn to let go of tradition and live with the decisions that involve the party that's paying for the entire thing, and let things be the way the bride and groom intended.

[quote="georgiagurl"]Tradition is whatever YOU make it. One day someone decides on a certain way of doing things, that is how a tradition starts. Having said that, who says that the way you want to do things is wrong. Girl, just do you. It your day. Just use my quote " Get in line or get left behind" I have been saying that since the planning began, people can either respect your vison for YOUR day and be supportive or they can sit down and be quiet.
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Beautiful, thanks! I know that I sort of wear my feelings on my shoulder so, with that said, I don't want to appear to be introverted these few days that I'm in Florida; I just want things to run smoothly, and I don't want folks trying to take over telling me I have to do this and that, simple.

[quote="DaughterRhonda"]Hey there Belleblanc, plain and simple it's your day! Do it your way! No if ands and buts about it. You and your FH are all you have to please and that's it! My wedding was not traditional, I didn't have a ring bearer or flower girl and I was told I needed them. We improvised and it worked out just fine -- I wouldn't have changed a thing. None of my girls had the same shoes because I wanted them to be comfortable and no two women have the same kind of feet. One thing I learned as having graduated into wifehood 10 days ago is that it all works out, just follow your heart. You can't please everyone. Remember to stay focused on the vision you have for you and your FH, because nothing else matters! Be encouraged my sister.
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I too broke with tradition and decided not to have a ring bearer. We were going to use our puppy Napoleon, but I'm not sure if I want to go through the drama of watching him and trying to keep myself together. It would have been the cutest thing. The ring bearer thing was taken hard by some relatives; when we decided not to do it, my Aunt asked me again when my mind wasn't on it and told me what I said about having another kid stand as ring bearer. Keep in mind that folks change their minds all of the time.

[quote="georgiagurl"]Tradition is whatever YOU make it. One day someone decides on a certain way of doing things, that is how a tradition starts. Having said that, who says that the way you want to do things is wrong. Girl, just do you. It your day. Just use my quote " Get in line or get left behind" I have been saying that since the planning began, people can either respect your vison for YOUR day and be supportive or they can sit down and be quiet.
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Here Here To That!

[quote="soontobebride"]I FEEL YOU %10000000 percent girl! This "tradition" and "your supposed to do this and that" crap is going to drive me up the wall. You are SO right when you say everyone talks about it being YOUR day, but everyone has their opinions and act like if you don't do it the "traditional" way it's wrong. I didn't really want a veil, but my mother had this look on her face like "what do you mean you don't want a veil", so I get a veil. I'm not big on pictures so I'm not that pressed to have a bridal portrait at the beginning, OH NO, don't tell this to my peeps, they are like, your SUPPOSED to have a bridal portrait. I mean it's wonderful if that's what YOU want at your wedding, nothing wrong with it at all, but it does not make it wrong because I don't care to have one.

I am getting a really good photographer because I want good pictures, that's something that will last a LONG time, and everyone always want to look at your wedding pictures no matter how many times you've seen it. So I'm taking care of that, BUT because I put getting a videographer WAY further down on my "NEED TO DO" list, people are trippin'. I mean I wouldn't mind getting one, but if I don't, I'm okay with that as long as I have my pictures. I know me and my FH, and we'll pay all that money for one, and might look at the video maybe ONE time after that. Everyone I know that have gotten married said that they have may have looked at their video ONCE. Anyway when I saw your post, I HAD to reply because it is SO true. We need to do what WE want to do, and stop trying to please others. That day is for the bride and groom. People will make you GO crazy with their supposed to do this, and this is how it's always been done.....okay...through venting....
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Pictures are for life. Videos are okay but, if you don't have the pictures, well, you summed it up nicely. Here's a few tips off of the subject. If anyone has problems with the harshness of winter with regard to thier skin, Curiel is a wonder product. I would rub lotion on myself morning, noon and night and still have this white ash on the sides of my feet. My friend told me what to do. I got a really good pumice stone and sand them down after bathing. Once that's done, I take and rub the Curiel on my feet about three times. It locks in the moisture and no ashy feet in the mornings! She also told me to take a cloth and put rose oil in it. Never wash it; once you shower, rub feet and hands with it every night.

As for photos, there are some places were you can take your photos and have them digitally altered to make you look younger, take away blemishes and trim some of the good eating off of some areas of the body, ha! It's not as expensive as you think. Try making inquiry with the Korean business; they are known for their expertise with this type of work. I plan on having my photos done this way after I receive them from the photographer. I'm not doing a portrait anytime soon; I could care less about that right now. Whose forking over the money for a portrait? Those things can be expensive, especially if you have them drawn, I already checked into that.

[quote="DaughterRhonda"]Hey there Belleblanc, plain and simple it's your day! Do it your way! No if ands and buts about it. You and your FH are all you have to please and that's it! My wedding was not traditional, I didn't have a ring bearer or flower girl and I was told I needed them. We improvised and it worked out just fine -- I wouldn't have changed a thing. None of my girls had the same shoes because I wanted them to be comfortable and no two women have the same kind of feet. One thing I learned as having graduated into wifehood 10 days ago is that it all works out, just follow your heart. You can't please everyone. Remember to stay focused on the vision you have for you and your FH, because nothing else matters! Be encouraged my sister.
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Thanks, much needed encouragement.

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I am frustrated; cannot post pics. That was the last attempt. Moving on to the forum of just chatting.