Chris Brown & Rhianna

Rosie..To be honest, I just don't know what to say about this.  Domestic Abuse is a very tough, yet sensitive area.  Without all the facts, other than the photo TMZ released, most people have made up their minds that Chris has a serious problem that have been somewhat hidden by his boyous looks...but a monster on the inside eventually surfaces on the outside.  BTW, the "Got Milk" ad was cancelled on him as well.

I think people are still very shocked. Its Chris Brown for goodness sakes!
Plus, as "cute" as they looked, there are couples who just have that look of love about them, and I never saw that. Some people just mesh, and flow with each other and to me I didn't see that. But that may be their personality. They could have been madly in love. I have heard people say they are still going to support him, because his career appears to be "over".  It seems that he still has some support. I can see Rihanna is acting like most battered women, and it appears to be shock, and now, she is not even sure she wants to call it quits. Which happens often. I think we need to pray for them both, and not be judgemental.
 
Some people make bigger mistakes than others, but after all this is said and done she will make a huge statement by finding forgiveness in her heart. For him, and for herself.

Lately I've spent more time on facebook and have been chatting about it and posting news items there. I never got around to doing it here.

The thing about Chris and Rhianna's relationship is that, as far as I know, before this, they had never publicly acknowledged that they were in a relationship. There were only those photos and news reports of them being spotted here and there kissing or something. When questioned, Rhianna would say that they were "friends."

I saw the TMZ photo for the first time last night and was shocked. For her to have those welts on her forehead, he was really hitting her hard. This crime was absolutely dispicable. I saw his stepfather on a video clip stating that it isn't really true that he used to hit Chris' mother, but every word he said sounded like a straight-up lie to me. There's no telling what this young man witnessed as a child, and how it has affected him.

No matter the situation, no man should EVER put his hands on any woman. I'm not going to ask what she did to provoke him as some do. [b]She did not deserve this.[/b] If a man and woman can't get along with one another, they should walk away and not let it escalate to this level. If I were her father, mother or sister, I would be beside myself with grief and anger. No one has the right to beat or kill another human being just because they are in or used to be in a relationship with that person. 

Brown released a statement saying he was "sorry and saddened... over what transpired," but did not go into detail about the altercation. Right now, he's hiding behind the judicial system by saying he's sorry about what happened but not admitting his guilt. However, it's O.K. for us to judge someone's actions. His actions have to be judged as [b]wrong [/b]by this society, by his peers, in order for him to recognize that he has a problem and be helped. No, we cannot afford to be quiet about this or the problem will perpetuate and worsen. I was listening to the Tom Joyner show the other morning and an expert said that it's better for a battered woman to yell, "Fire!" rather than "Help!" because some people tend to turn a blind eye not wanting to get involved in what they consider a personal issue. However, this is not a personal issue, it's a criminal issue.

When God tells us not to judge (Matthew 7:1), the context goes on to explain that he is forbidding the prideful kind of judging in which we find fault with others with a better than thou, self righteous spirit (Matthew 7:2-5). On the other hand, when God tells us to admonish another person if he/she is doing something contrary to his holy will (Matthew 18:13-17, Galatians 6:1 "restore someone caught in a sin", Ephesians 5:11 "expose the deeds of darkness", Colossians 3:16 "admonish one another"), the context always reminds us to do this with a humble spirit of seeking to bring a brother or sister back to serving God instead of the devil (Matthew 18:15 "win your brother over", Jude 23 "snatch them from the fire").

Domestic abuse is serious. It's not O.K. It's unfortunate that it has taken this country's legal system [b]so long[/b] to see it that way. Women, and men for that matter, need to recognize [url=http://tinyurl.com/bhbseb][b]the signs[/b][/url] of an abuser and take the necessary actions to protect themselves. See more [url=http://www.brokenspirits.com/information/the_abuser.asp][b]here[/b][/url].

It's been about two years since my mother's friend's niece was shot and killed by her ex-boyfriend who was a police officer. This young lady was in my younger sister's class and was her mother's only child. She left behind a young daughter to be raised by just a father and grandmother.

I pray that Chris Brown gets the much needed psychological counseling that he desperately needs before he hurts someone again and that his actions serve God once again. I pray that Rhianna recovers from this and is able to love herself and eventually have a loving relationship with a man whose actions also serve God.

Is there business. Hello find[b] your[/b] own!!!

Okay, see this is why anon posting should not be allowed. Anyway, I hope they both seek professional help.

I was soo shocked by this and I ad hoped it was not as bad as they said it was. After seeing the pics, I think by the severity of that beating that he has hit her before. It  pains me that such a young man can be sooo angry at women. It bring the whole issue of teens battering their mate to the light.
We all know women who are being beaten and perhaps we shoud be talking about it.

Amen Plat. How you gonna call yourself "Nosey" then tell somebody else to stay out of folks business? What a quack!
Thats why its called a DISCUSSION BOARD".
 
I hate lames.

I am shocked, I must say.  However, I hope both of these young people find the healing that they both deserve. 

I dont know how credible People Magazine's sources are, but she took him back:
[url=http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20262240,00.html]http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20262240,00.html[/url]
Wow.

How many times did Tina Turner, Madonna, Halle Berry, and Cecily Tyson return to Ike Turner, Sean Pean, Wesley Snipes, and Miles Davis before they said enough is enough? Some women will return to their abuser. For Rhianna and Chris this is much too soon. He hasn't as yet received the counseling he needs.

The problem for them is that now there is widespread internet access where people can download and research information at any moment. News is readily available at any time. Since everyone can always google Chris and for years to come, this story will pop up 1st because this is the widest coverage he has ever had on CNN, NYTimes, and all the majors. The public with the deepest pockets has pretty much lost respect for Chris Brown...hence his endorsements have gone down the drain. Will he ever get to perform on the Grammy's again? Maybe he'll become a thug rapper because his squeaky clean image is gone.

The truth is that Rhianna needs to rise to the occasion as a strong role model and feminist in order to keep her fans and take her teen popstar career to the next level. Pre-teens and teenagers were waiting to see what she was going to do. How will this affect how they react when their boyfriends beat them?

Time will tell about this situation...keeping them in prayer.

Hi Ladies! 

It's been a long time...
I say someone needs to get RiRi a copy of 'Mad at Miles' stat!  Rumor mill says Jay Z is trying to set up a meeting between her and Tina Turner. I've never been in this situation myself but my mother and I witnessed my younger sister at 18/19 years old coming home with bruises on her arms and a black eye and she'd make every excuse for how it happened.  It wasn't until her abuser came to our home, while I was there, and attacked her while she was 6 months pregnant that I called the police on him. I couldn't press charges because he didn't hit ME, but, he had warrants for his arrest and he went away anyway.  She now has 2 kids by him and is pregnant with twins as I type this.  He has mellowed out but he still doesn't have a job, isn't looking for one, and she is doing this on her own.  She's going to have 4 kids under 5 years old and she's only 23 years old. 
The #1 reason for going back is, "Because I love him" and "He promised he'd change."  What can we do, as women, to try to stop this cycle? What should we be teaching our young women about their worth and value so they don't take this kind of abuse? At what age should we begin educating them to not stand for this.

Sorry to hear about your sister. It was good that you called the police. To answer your questions, we have to start teaching both genders, male and female from young children about any type of abuse whether its emotional, verbal, sexual, or physical. Neither should be an abuser or be abused. Teach them about "good touch" "bad touch", any threats against them that make them feel like they are in danger. I posted some links to warning signs above. Let your children know that they can always talk to you.  Tell them who else they can turn to if a problem arises.

Also, know that children notice everything. If they see/hear adults being abused or being abusive to someone regularly, they will begin to think that's normal behavior. I think you have to instill confidence in them so that they know their value in this world and let them know the harm that can happen when someone is abusive.

It's hard, but the innocent have to be protected.

[quote="VIPrincessBride"] To answer your questions, we have to start teaching both genders, male and female from young children about any type of abuse whether its emotional, verbal, sexual, or physical. Neither should be an abuser or be abused. Teach them about "good touch" "bad touch", any threats against them that make them feel like they are in danger. [/quote]

I completely agree.  I've been away for a while because me and my then fiance decided to take a bit of break. Mine involved me going off to work for now President Obama for about 2 years, and while working for him i remember the discussion of whether or not he supports teaching age appropriate sex education, and he is for it, and I remember people (mostly fox news conservatives) distorting it and saying things like, "zOMG!! HE WANTS TO TEACH 6YR OLDS BOUT TEH SECKS!!!"  Which really trivializes, IMO, the real dangers kids are in when they remain ignorant about improper behaviors and don't know who to tell. I think moreso than sex education being taught in schools, there should be an open dialogue and information on relationship education to discuss proper/improper relationships.

Anyway, I wish we could change our usernames here, because I haven't spoken to Mr. Lee since the New Year when he got mad that I spent it with friends and not with him (it was my first time back in the state since August 2007 and we'd grown apart.)

Its so sad!! I think we need to pray for her and women like her for strength- I know SOOO many women who are battered and who stay- the longer she stays the harder it will be for her. And you know she is praying he will change, because she loves him. Even though we all know its highly improbable- she is just human, and perhaps even MORE vulnerable because she is living her life in a fish bowl

2 new articles were recently published:

Check them out:

[url=http://a-list.msn.com/default.aspx?cp-searchtext=Dating%20violence]http://a-list.msn.com/default.aspx?cp-searchtext=Dating%20violence[/url]

[url=http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/lifestyle/health/chi-talk-rihannamar10,0,7561220.column]http://www.chicagotribune.com/features/lifestyle/health/chi-talk-rihannamar10,0,7561220.column[/url]

They mention that women who have been victims of choking, as Rihanna allegedly was, are twice as likely to later be killed by their partners as those who were attacked but not choked.

To domestic violence experts, choking is not just another element in a brutal attack. It is a harbinger of potential murder.

"An act of strangulation was often a precursor to a domestic homicide," said Marna Anderson, executive director of WATCH, a Minneapolis-based domestic violence court monitoring organization.

She uses the word "strangle" deliberately, even for attacks that are not fatal. The word "choking," she said, fails to capture the act's viciousness.

"It's intended to cause death or to instill enough fear for the victim to realize that this person could actually kill her," she said. "And there's something very intimate about it, when you think of how close you have to be. You don't see a lot of acts of strangulation in bar fights or stranger assaults."

"There is something particularly chilling about choking," said Carolyn Rebecca Block, senior research analyst with the Illinois Criminal Justice Information Authority and principal investigator for the Chicago study.

"If somebody can look you in the eye and squeeze the breath of life out of you ... what kind of person could do that to someone else?" she said. "You're talking about the ultimate degree of power and control."
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You know, one summer when I was in college, a young woman who had just graduated was found strangled in her apartment (this was Boston). They never arrested anyone. However, some wondered if her murderer was someone she knew or was dating. It was a small black community at school, and so we all knew her. It hurt us deeply.

Awwww.... now the lovebirds have recorded a song together according to CNN's sources:
[url=http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/03/12/chris.brown.rihanna.duet/index.html]http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/03/12/chris.brown.rihanna.duet/index.html[/url]
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