2 Young?!?

Hello and welcome. I can't speak on age in a negitive fashion. I say if you have found your life partner and you also happen to be young then you go girl, better early than late!
Do you have reservations, or have you been hearing negitivity from others?

07bride....welcome....If you don't mind me asking, how old are you? Secondly, I think it depends more on your maturity level as opposed to age.

I totally agree with MsBoston & Soon2B...As long as you're old enough to get married & realize this isn't something you do on a whim, age isn't an issue. Unless, you have personal reservations. How old are you?

For a while I was the youngest to-be bride here at the age of 22 (now 23 wedding fast approaching),so I would like to know how old you are? I agree with the other ladies that it depends on your and your FH maturity level. It also depends on how strong your relationship is. I would say if things are rough dont do it so early,give it a little more time to grow and you guys can lear each other pet peves and attitudes. And after learning all of this if this is the person you want to be with and you can handle it all (things wont always be peachy clean) then I say go for it! Forget what others think! People will always try to tell you what to do.If you are of age to get a marriage license without a parental consent then you are old enough to make your own decisions......

I think that when people say you are too young to get married they mean that decisions you may make now, you may realize in a short time that it was the right one to make. For instance, when I got my tubes tied my doctor asked me if I was sure, I of course said yes. He asked me that if the certain decisions I made when I was 17 would I still make them, I said no. He went on to say now that I am 27 do I think when I am 37 will I still agree with the decision I made. Of course I said yes.LOL. But certain things you do when you are younger you sometimes turn around and say what the hell was I thinking.

I agree with what all the Vibrides have said but also want to add my two cents. I'm AllieS' runner up on these boards being 25 and all and i have to say i constantly check-in with myself to make sure i'm making the right decision for me. I had to give my sister a reality check just last weekend. She is 19 and two of her friends from high school got married right after prom (used the same photos for their announcements) anyway they've been married almost a year and she spent last weekend at their house. He's 19 and she's 18 and although they love each other very much, for them it was too soon. They were both running away from bad environments and depending on the other one to save them. Now they hate each other. I'll say to you the same thing i said to my sister: Take your time. When i was 18 i was still trying to figure out what kind of woman i wanted to be (currently a work in progress). I'd hate to marry a man who loved 18 year old Musik and have him look across the table at 35 year old Musik and see a stranger he resents.

Bottomline: If you guys think you can grow together (not apart) and give each other room to evolve into fully realized individuals, I say go for it! Our society punishes young love and it's unfair to those of us who know what we want now.

P.S. How old ARE you?

Bottom line everything in life is a gamble no matter how old you are, no one really knows how it will all turn out. I am quite sure that divorced couples didnt think they will be divorced. Sometimes you just have to follow your heart, but all the time you have to look at the big picture and figure out pros and cons and if you can live with that for the rest of your life. Forget what everyone else says, if you are second guessing yourself then you are not ready. Just my opinion.

[quote="housewife147"]Bottom line everything in life is a gamble no matter how old you are, no one really knows how it will all turn out. I am quite sure that divorced couples didnt think they will be divorced. Sometimes you just have to follow your heart, but all the time you have to look at the big picture and figure out pros and cons and if you can live with that for the rest of your life. Forget what everyone else says, if you are second guessing yourself then you are not ready. Just my opinion.
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Well said Housewife!!

Amen Housewife!

[quote="housewife147"] Forget what everyone else says, if you are second guessing yourself then you are not ready. Just my opinion.
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When she's right, she's right

Thanks ladies!

07_Bride, welcome to the site! I'm 23 and I believe that as long as you are able to understand that marriage is not a game, but a commitment. You two are starting your life together and announcing it to the world. I know people in their 60s and 70s that still don't feel ready to be married. It has nothing to do with age.

I'm curious though, how old are you?

Where did she go? Now we all want to know how old you are.

[quote="MsBoston"]Where did she go? Now we all want to know how old you are.
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Right!!! She just left us hanging.

I guess she is 2 young.

LOL!
I could...but I'm gonna go ahead and leave that one alone.

Maybe she didn't get the answer she was looking for.

You ladies are a HI-larious....I'm over here trippin' reading these last posts.....too much...

Sounds like you're on your way to a bright future. Glad we didn't scare you off, 007. Hope you like your nickname, Rosie (Rosetta) debuted it in another post.

07,I agree with the other ladies.I don't think 19 is too young as long as you both are on the right level of maturity.My parents were both 19 when they married.34 years later,they're still married.

07_Bride. I will say this: Because you are 19, you and FH will "grow together". Personally I remember that at 19 I still didn't really know who i was and by the time I TURNED 21 I was different, as were my needs. The same goes for when I was 23 and the same applies now that i am 26. I have been with my FH since I was 19 and i will admit it was a struggle because we were not really "whole" people because we were just starting college, and so a lot of our struggles were from learning about who we are and then trying to please each other while we were constantly changing in front of each others eyes. I know this now, but not then. Looking back we both see this too. Understand this and remember this if you ever begin to feel like "you don't know this man" or feel like you made a mistake. When all of our friends were breaking up over immature stuff, we didn't know why (even though we wanted to quit at times)-but we decided to stay together....Remember this because BOTH your perspectives on life and feelings on relationships and love will change-guaranteed. But if you can just dig in and decide to live as God designed-and keep life and reality in perspective, you will be fine. Adjust to his growing pains, and remind him that you too are growing. Keep God first, and please do seek Godly counsel and join a couples class immediately. Good Luck:)

Good luck 07_Bride.

Congrats on taking such a big step. Girl, some couples (way older than us) would never think they need to do such a thing.
They need to do a study on couples who do counseling and those who do not, and if there are stats that measure the difference on the length of their marriage. I bet that would be interesting

I can honestly say that I am not the same person I was at 19. Over the years I have grown and now realize what my parents, family, and friends were trying to tell me. I can also say that throught the years both my fh and myself have grown togethor. We had our first child at 19 and yes we have went through things that made us stop and wonder if it was really worth saving or working on, but we got through it. I must admit we had grown togethor, and I see a tremendous change in my fh.

The thing is (which is important because in this society, women are trained not to put up with a man's-anything) is that you all stuck it out. And God honors that. I had been (still do sometimes) struggling with my FH and what God showed me who is was...however right now my FH is s-l-o-w-l-y walking into his destiny. As his future wife, I know as far as my relationship with God I am a little further than he. It could have a lot to do with just that we women just move and grow faster in most situations because we are affected by everything....however, I remember when I didn't care to really try to deal with our "growing pains". Especially since we were unequally yoked. Long story short, I am determined to let God do his job and work on my FH. If I step in and try to fix things myself (outside of continuing to walk in the spirit and all), then I am messing up the blessing, and not really showing much faith in God's ability to do what he says he would.
Just this past week my FH was just being slow with something, and it was brought to my attention that eventually in life he is going to have to come out of his old ways because it would affect our relationship in the future. Well of course I was already praying on it, and just today in church people were telling me how much of a great man in God he is and I am lucky to have him....basically, God's message to me is just to hold on. So I am saying all that to say House: Bravo!

You are the reason why marriages do stay together. Keep inspiring us. Cause it aint easy. But in the end doing God's will is worth it!

At 19 if I knew what I know now...I would make sooo many different choices. But that's me. I didn't care who said what, or what they thought they knew. Hot headed...Ignorant really. But we live and we learn. I can say that by going to pre-marital counseling you guys have your minds on the right track. That right there shows an unrivled level of maturity.

I don't think 19 is too young in some cultures people get married at 15 & 16 and even younger.Some have arranged marriages where they have only met the gentleman once or twice and with relatives around.Some are very happy.At least you have been in this relationship long enough to know what is right for you both.

The wisdom on this forum is mind boggling! Well said ladies.

Rhony you crack me up!