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3 months to Go!

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paradisecityeyb
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Joined: 08/29/2007 - 14:06
3 months to Go!

Hello All... I am 3 months away from my wedding day in May...and I am in a state of panic! At first the planning was great I had all the details to the wedding I wanted and needed! Now some of the things I had planned for have shifted to accomodate many people. First I moved to Dallas, TX to be with my fiance. Because he was awarded his grandmother's estate after she passed. And we very well couldn't be in KY, while he had business back home. So to stay close to my man I dropped everything and picked up and moved to TX! I was going to move here this year anyway after our May wedding. But this took me off course, because our wedding is still going to be in KY It's very hard to keep everything going from TX. I am stuck with my school work and graduation plans, my wedding plans, and trying to update a complete house from the 50's...ugggh! My attendants clearly know what is going on and what they need to achieve befoe my wedding day, but I get tons of emails and phone calls each week over the same things... which is very frustrating. Plus, my fiancee doesn't seem to think he needs to help, he just needs to worry about the rings and his tux! I haven't came up with a menu yet for the reception. My parents are telling me to just serve snacks, but I want people to sit down and conversate. My fiance's family most likely will not be able to attend because of the distance. So, they are talking about a Dallas reception as well..more money!!!! Help with any suggestions or solution!

paradisecityeyb
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Last seen: 9 years 8 months ago
Joined: 08/29/2007 - 14:06
3 months to Go!

Hello All... I am 3 months away from my wedding day in May...and I am in a state of panic! At first the planning was great I had all the details to the wedding I wanted and needed! Now some of the things I had planned for have shifted to accomodate many people. First I moved to Dallas, TX to be with my fiance. Because he was awarded his grandmother's estate after she passed. And we very well couldn't be in KY, while he had business back home. So to stay close to my man I dropped everything and picked up and moved to TX! I was going to move here this year anyway after our May wedding. But this took me off course, because our wedding is still going to be in KY It's very hard to keep everything going from TX. I am stuck with my school work and graduation plans, my wedding plans, and trying to update a complete house from the 50's...ugggh! My attendants clearly know what is going on and what they need to achieve befoe my wedding day, but I get tons of emails and phone calls each week over the same things... which is very frustrating. Plus, my fiancee doesn't seem to think he needs to help, he just needs to worry about the rings and his tux! I haven't came up with a menu yet for the reception. My parents are telling me to just serve snacks, but I want people to sit down and conversate. My fiance's family most likely will not be able to attend because of the distance. So, they are talking about a Dallas reception as well..more money!!!! Help with any suggestions or solution!

Soon to be Mrs....

housewife147
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Joined: 06/25/2006 - 11:12
Re: 3 months to Go!

Ok first off I am sorry to hear that people are getting on your nerves, but trust me you are not the only one. I think we all have experienced some sort of drama. I think you need to call and emergency meeting with your bridal party, wheither it is conference calling or in person. I would explain to them that you will be getting married in two months and they need to have all of the items necessary for your wedding. I would inform them that you are currently trying to plan a wedding from another state and that you can no longer deal with nonsense from them. I would then inform them that if they are having problems then they need to discuss that with the moh. I would inform them that you want them to do all of the thing expected from them, because if the shoe was on the other foot you would do it for them.

As far as the reception. I think you should have it the way you want. If your reception hall doesnt provide catering, you should get on the phone and call around to see it what diffrent companies offer. Or you can sit down make out a menu, and call reliable family members and ask them if they would cook a few dishes.

As for your fh, girl I think most of the grooms feel like all they have to worry about is the money. Speaking for myself, I usually go to the florist, photographer, stores, etc.. with either my mother when she's up here, or with members of my bridal party. I have only went to the DJ with my fh and the reception venue. I have tried to include him in the planning process however he always says it doesn't matter whatever I want. If I keep pressing the issue, he will pick something that he knows I will hate so I wont ask him again.

Time is ticking sweetie. It is now time to take control and handle things yourself, and think about peoples feeling later. If you constantly worry about others it will be the wedding they always wanted and the one you always talked about.

tiffyb
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Joined: 08/31/2007 - 13:30
Re: 3 months to Go!

Welcome to the site Paradise! I am very sorry to hear of your problems, but I think house gave you some excellent advice. I just want to let you that I to am completing my final semester of grad school while living in Atlanta and planning a wedding that will take place in Pittsburgh. I know how difficult this is, and believe me, my FH is the same way, only needs to know the date and time of the wedding. Up until recently, he has had no parts of the planning process at all. Now coming down to the end, and with my schedule getting so crazy with school, he has been wonderful. So I'm just here to let you know that when you are really feeling down about things, let him know how you feel, and I guarantee you he will step in to provide support for you in any way that he can. Let him take on some of your stress.

ginoue
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Joined: 06/04/2007 - 06:23
Re: 3 months to Go!

Welcome to the sisterhood paradise!!! House is right on the money with the advice she gave you!!! As far as FH is concerned, please, he will be no help to you whatsoever. I think most of the ladies here will back me up in saying that "we'd rather do it ourselves", because when we constantly nag and they finally do it, we have to go back and do it over again. Diva, take a deep breath and advise all your attendants that whatever the problem, shoot them to your MOH, who is suppose to be shielding you from all of this mess anyways and then, she will speak with you and give you an update. You chose her because she knows you and knows what you want and how you want things, trust her to do her thing.

With my FH, he's like "Mommy, your name is on everything and besides, this is your business right? Just let me know where and when you need me". There are times that I feel like slapping the Jesus out of him, but I just smile, give him a big hug, kiss him and say "I do love you, you know". He just smile as if he just won the lottery and turn away, but girl, if he knew that seconds before that I was contemplating slapping him, I wonder what he would say (LMAO). So you see, we all have those FH. I don't really ask anymore. I just say "Papi, come and look at this. What do you think?" He would say, "wow, that's great!!! Is this for a client?" I would say, "no, it's for us". He would just smile and kiss me and walk away.

See, you don't want them messing up your planning anyway. As far as the house renovation is concerned, please, don't stress over it. Just take it one room at a time and check out if they have a "Direct Buy" where you live. Girl, you will save a ton of money. Before you spend another penny, check it out. You will find everything there very affordable too (tiles, counters, beds, everything!!!)

You're doing fine Diva Paradise!!! Just take a deep breath when you're frustrated. Make yourself a Marguerita or a glass of wine and take a relaxing bubble bath. You'll tune your FH out quickly for a while until you're ready to baby him again. Again, welcome and congrats on your special day!!!

platinumstyle
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Joined: 09/28/2005 - 12:32
Re: 3 months to Go!

Well said, House and Ginoue! Welcome to the site, Paradise!

Born Blessed!

daughterrhonda
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Joined: 05/26/2005 - 17:30
Re: 3 months to Go!

Excellent advice ladies.

Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37

ginoue
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Joined: 06/04/2007 - 06:23
Re: 3 months to Go!

Thanks Rhonny

deelove
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Joined: 09/14/2007 - 00:09
Re: 3 months to Go!

The ladies have already given good advice so I won't say more other than welcome to the site sista... hope all goes well with the final planning.

soon2bmsj
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Joined: 08/08/2007 - 08:26
Re: 3 months to Go!

welcome paradisecityeyb!! I see we are neighbors! (I actually live in Irving)