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BRIDAL PARTY

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missoptimism
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BRIDAL PARTY

I WAS SEARCHING THE INTERNET AND CAME ACROSS THIS SITE, MY WEDDING IS NOV 11, AND I HAVE A PROBLEM W/MY BRIDESMAIDS GOWNS. I THOUGHT TRADITIIONALLY THE BMS ARE SUPPOSED TO PAY FOR THEIR OWN DRESSES.I DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT HAVING TO ASK THEM TO PITCH IN, BUT I FEEL THEY SHOULD AT LEAST OFFER TO PAY SOMETHING ON THEM. I'M ON A TIGHT BUDGET. I HAVE THREE KIDS I'M HAVING TO GET READY, MY FIANCE IS OVERSEAS IN THE WAR AND WE ARE ON A TIGHT BUDGET. ANY ONE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO!!!

missoptimism
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BRIDAL PARTY

I WAS SEARCHING THE INTERNET AND CAME ACROSS THIS SITE, MY WEDDING IS NOV 11, AND I HAVE A PROBLEM W/MY BRIDESMAIDS GOWNS. I THOUGHT TRADITIIONALLY THE BMS ARE SUPPOSED TO PAY FOR THEIR OWN DRESSES.I DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT HAVING TO ASK THEM TO PITCH IN, BUT I FEEL THEY SHOULD AT LEAST OFFER TO PAY SOMETHING ON THEM. I'M ON A TIGHT BUDGET. I HAVE THREE KIDS I'M HAVING TO GET READY, MY FIANCE IS OVERSEAS IN THE WAR AND WE ARE ON A TIGHT BUDGET. ANY ONE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO!!!

AND NOW ABIDE FAITH, HOPE, LOVE, THESE THREE; BUT THE GREATEST OF THESE IS LOVE. 1COR 13:13

nlbostic
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

Hello Missy and welcome to vibride. Is your wedding in November of 2006? Girl, ya'll better get together and decide something quick...that's right around the corner. Typically, the BM's are supossed to pay for their own dresses. If you offered to pay for them, that's another story, but they shouldn't expect you to buy them with all of the other expenses you incur from planning a wedding. I don't know what their individual financial situations are, but maybe you can see how much they are willing to pay and look for something in that price range. You may even be able to find a place that will rent the dresses. Tradidionally, it's not your responsibility. Good luck!

crrez4
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

Congratulations!!! I don't know were you live but at Davids bridal gowns and Tuxes can be rented. Traditionally, BM are suppose to pay form their dresses. When you ask them to be in the wedding you need to let them know they will need to buy their dresses. They would only know this if they were in a wedding before. If they can not afford the dress you love, they can wear different dresses in the same color scheme (one that ou agree upon of course). Have yiu decided on you colors? Do you have a dress in mind?

daughterrhonda
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

Congratulations MissOptimism! My wedding is also on November 11, 2006. I am on a tight budget also. My bridesmaids are paying for their dresses. How many bridemaids do you have. Perhaps you need to have a conversation with the ladies and ask them to atleast contribute something. I would like to tell you that it is very common for bridesmaides to pay for their own dresses. I purchased their jewelry and their bouquets, but they are responsible for everything else. Good luck.

Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37

janicej
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

Welcome and congratulation on your big day. Have you ever thought about them having there dresses made sometimes it a little cheaper on the individual I really don't know ther budget. What are your colors for your wedding we can help find a cheaper dress or a different style for you. But in tradtion the BM'S usually purchase their own dresses.

I can do all things through christ which strengthens me.

purebliss
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

The only cases that I've seen where the bride pays for the BM's attire is for the rich. Where did you hear that? At any rate, find out what they are willing to pay and then begin looking in their price range. Hang in there and welcome! You're in the right place!

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bumblebeekee
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

[quote="missoptimism"]I WAS SEARCHING THE INTERNET AND CAME ACROSS THIS SITE, MY WEDDING IS NOV 11, AND I HAVE A PROBLEM W/MY BRIDESMAIDS GOWNS. I THOUGHT TRADITIIONALLY THE BMS ARE SUPPOSED TO PAY FOR THEIR OWN DRESSES.I DON'T FEEL GOOD ABOUT HAVING TO ASK THEM TO PITCH IN, BUT I FEEL THEY SHOULD AT LEAST OFFER TO PAY SOMETHING ON THEM. I'M ON A TIGHT BUDGET. I HAVE THREE KIDS I'M HAVING TO GET READY, MY FIANCE IS OVERSEAS IN THE WAR AND WE ARE ON A TIGHT BUDGET. ANY ONE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE ON WHAT TO DO!!!
[/quote]

Hi and welcome: Remember that them paying for their rental/or dress is their gift to you....Also, if you feel bad, you can pay for their shoes, or get them all the same matching jewelry.....But when you ask your (potential) bridesmaids about being in the wedding, I have seen people give them invitiations w/ instructions and responsibilities. Or you can just have a nice sit down with them asking them to be in the wedding.....If budget is your concern, have less BM's
However you do it, the best thing is to be up front about your situation and their responsibilities, and your expectations....you can google "Bridesmaid and MOH responsibilities".
I went through that frustration, but when I asked my girlfriend, she thanked me and said she can't wait to buy her dress! As a married woman...she understood....and you might want to consider asking people who have been in weddings before....Good Luck

We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)

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missoptimism
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

Hello ladies, thanx for the advice on my BM gowns. My oldest sister whom I asked to be my MOH, is in school working on her teacher certication and I really want her standing by myside. My other sister also older is not working right now, I'm the youngest and although I work as a nurse. I have an expensive gown and want my wedding to be just right. My third BM, a friend I went to nursing school w/ is excited about being ther for me. I just told myself I don't want to let money stand in the way of the most important day of my life. Unfortunately I have had to borrow a loan, my Dad is paying for our reception. I'm putting the reception money toward repayment of the loan I borrowed to get the two dresses. My fiance is putting something toward the reception. I'm not going to put a guilt trip on my sisters. Even though I know if it were some of their friends' wedding they would move heaven and earth to get what it took. I'm too excited about having a blessed wedding to let them spoil what God has given me. I'm just thankful the Lord has blessed me to be able to get the dresses. So,it's okay. They may need me to be there for their weddings, I will do what I can to help them still. I'm not that type of woman. I believe in trusting the Lord in all things. Yall be blessed!!! With man it's impossible, but with God all things are possible. ALL THINGS WORK FOR TOGETHER FOR THE GOOD, TO THEM THAT LOVE GOD AND ARE CALLED ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE!!!!!!

AND NOW ABIDE FAITH, HOPE, LOVE, THESE THREE; BUT THE GREATEST OF THESE IS LOVE. 1COR 13:13

futuremslee
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

i am happy things worked out as you wanted them to. Just a word of caution, do not spend the rest of your life paying for one day.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way. ~ Pablo Neruda

bumblebeekee
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

[quote="FutureMsLee"]i am happy things worked out as you wanted them to. Just a word of caution, do not spend the rest of your life paying for one day.
[/quote]

Lee you are soooo right! Its just one day, really a few hours....Optimism, if you are at peace with God on this and at peace with yourself, then go for it. All my best to you.

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dwbride
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Re: BRIDAL PARTY

It's good to hear you have found a solution to your problem. For anyone else who may be having the same problem: think about having your BMs buy a dress in you wedding color. It will match her personality and she may not have a problem buying it because she will want to wear it at a later date. Word of caution though, give guidelines. You want someone to have on a mini-dress walking down the aisle!