Hi every one im new here and I'm getting really frustrated with this whole wedding planning thing. I just recently set a date with my fiance for next march but we cant agree on anything after that. I want a small but very beautiful weding in a family members backyard and he wants vegas. I planned for a $5000 wedding which I think is really cheap and I have all these great ideas but he dont agree with anythingi want.Everything is too expensive for him but he has no ideas on how to make it less expensive and he dont have and ideas on what he wants to make the wedding different than what i planned,how do i get him to see that if we cant agree on something this big now then it may just get worse later. And the whole thing is because hes a male and weddings are for girls he dont see why it has to be so expensive....im really savin him money by just spending $5000...right?
Hi every one im new here and I'm getting really frustrated with this whole wedding planning thing. I just recently set a date with my fiance for next march but we cant agree on anything after that. I want a small but very beautiful weding in a family members backyard and he wants vegas. I planned for a $5000 wedding which I think is really cheap and I have all these great ideas but he dont agree with anythingi want.Everything is too expensive for him but he has no ideas on how to make it less expensive and he dont have and ideas on what he wants to make the wedding different than what i planned,how do i get him to see that if we cant agree on something this big now then it may just get worse later. And the whole thing is because hes a male and weddings are for girls he dont see why it has to be so expensive....im really savin him money by just spending $5000...right?
Welcome Alvinslove. May be you could compromise have the wedding in the backyard then off to Vegas for the honeymoon. I think $5000 is inexpensive also. Ask him to jot done any ideas for the wedding that He may have. Not necessarily to make it less expensive, just things that he would like to happen/be apart of the wedding. You said it wasn't until March '07 right? If so than you have plenty of time to throw ideas at each other and feed off of each others' creative vision. Calm down, once the 'sistas' read this you'll have more advice than you'll know what to do with. And it's all good advice, no crackpots here :)
Dear Alvinsl., it will all work out. We sometimes have to keep in mind that after all is said and done...the two of you will be together....enjoying life. It seems like the wedding planning is a prereq. for couples...if you cant compromise now, what happens down the line with even bigger projects and decisions? First things first, have you sat him down and told him just how important this day is to you? Women dream of the wedding day from childhood....it's like a coming of age thing for us....amd running off to Vegas is something you guys can do for a honeymoon, or anniversary. But... I understand he wants to participate in the planning so why dont you let him handle the entertainment/catering portion of it...my FH and I had a teeny tiny big blow out *yep* big one the other day over the limos.....he wants a 900dollar hummer////complete with hardwood floors and a laser light show...my first reaction was H no. But he explained....he wants to leave his mark on the event as well. Sweetie dont fight with him, you guys must meet half way..have you talked to your Father lately about it? He will give you the answer. Blessings.
HIS eye is on the sparrow, and I know HE watches.........me
We will be sitting down and talking about our wedding ideas together on Sunday.He will put him inout in on the ideas i have and I will finally get to see what ideas he has of his own.So far he has expressed no real wants for the wedding but he said by sunday he will.Please pray for me on this one.I told him that I want a fairy tale wedding but he said we dont have fairy tale money which I understand.Slowly but srely WE will get throught this.As far as my father goes (biological) he's in no position to help me out because he has his own really big problems right now.And my heavenly father (God) is giving me the patience and understanding I need to get through all of this.I will update you on this after we have our "meeting" on Sunday.
Hi AlvinsLove, gurl you and I have so much in common. My wedding budget is $5,000 also and we are doing fine with that. (We set such an inexpensive budget, because I will be relocating to another state which may cost me a pretty penny. And our daughter is turning 16 this year and we have to do something special for her as well) Anyway, I first want to say that experience has taught me this lesson -- along with a little nudging from my ViBride sistahs. Sometimes as women we get so excited and all we talk about is wedding, wedding, wedding. There is nothing wrong with that but the guys can't seem to get with it as quickly as we have. Therefore, I'd like to offer the following advice. This is what has worked with me. I put together folders of information/ideas and the cost and I left it for him to look at in his leisure. I left him alone, and low and behold eventually he started having ideas/input. My wedding is 11/06 and my honey is really having a say now and for that I am grateful. Sometimes, we just have to allow them a chance to be involved by their own terms. In any event AlvinsLove, I wish you and your FH all the best in your planning.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Hey There Alvin, Rony has some fabulous ideas....she is right on the ball with this one.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
Hey Alvins love - I think you should print this post and some others and show it to him. lol
THANK YOU GUYS !....I MEAN GIRLS...LOL. I'm going to take your advice Rhonda. I will organize all my ideas in an order that he will understand and give it to him to read.Right now all my ideas are in my head I guess this gives me a reason to put it down on paper. I was supposed to talk about a new budget with him las sunday but I think it freaked him out, so needless to say we didnt have the talk.I think I really do need to give him time to let all this wedding business sink in.I found a way to get my budget down tremendously by ordering from the website www.wrapwithus.com . Since I get so much information from the ladies here I thought I would give a little back. Just in case anybody is in the same situation as me or they just really want to save money.
Hey AlvinsLove, you will see it will all work out!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Hey Alvin thanks for that site....anything to help save money
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
That is a nice site, I've purchased some extra gifts for those people who helped out as a little thank you. Check it out ladies.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
alvin
when it comes to weddings I don't think the men understand the way we do. I have that problem with my FH and found out that it is normal. Most of the brides I spoke with said they even spent more money on the wedding then the groom. I asked that same question. I want to go away and get married on a island and he wants a big ol wedding, but when I start buying stuff he has a heart attack saying it's too expensive. 5,000 was my limit, but the place he picked for the reception is rediculous. Hang in there i'm sure you'll get everything together
You are sooooooo right VirtuousV!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
UPDATE!
Ok Fh agreed to let me do te wedding here for a maximum of $3000.I planned everything down to the last minute,even thought my wedding isnt until next year.After all the hard work I put in to this wedding he INSISTS we go to VEGAS!So I'm not going to fight with him.I'm giving in.There is no way i can win this battle.I went as far to plan everything and he doesnt appretciate the time and effort I put in to it so I quit!