Hey ladies. I just need to vent a little. I know that planning a wedding entails a lot, but gesh. When I think of the money, I get really depressed. I was talking to Bossy last night and told her I covered a lot - the reception/ceremony site, DJ, Photographer & Videographer have all been booked. I have all of my favors also. And she told me I still have a lot to do - the small things add up. I actually thought about it today and I'm thinking where are we going to get all of this money from? Part time job is out of the question because I have 2 kids and no one to keep them at night. FH already works 12+ hour days. Parents are trying to retire soon. FMIL hasn't offered to pay for nada (not that she's obligated too - but gesh it's her only child). Y'all please pray for me becasue God's knows that's the only thing that's going to help me.
Hey ladies. I just need to vent a little. I know that planning a wedding entails a lot, but gesh. When I think of the money, I get really depressed. I was talking to Bossy last night and told her I covered a lot - the reception/ceremony site, DJ, Photographer & Videographer have all been booked. I have all of my favors also. And she told me I still have a lot to do - the small things add up. I actually thought about it today and I'm thinking where are we going to get all of this money from? Part time job is out of the question because I have 2 kids and no one to keep them at night. FH already works 12+ hour days. Parents are trying to retire soon. FMIL hasn't offered to pay for nada (not that she's obligated too - but gesh it's her only child). Y'all please pray for me becasue God's knows that's the only thing that's going to help me.
Don't be discouraged, just pace yourself. Do a little at a time, has the date changed from Sept. 2007?
Living my life like it's GOLDEN!!
No Niquey. It's still the same. But, so much is coming up between now and the wedding. And the rent and bills don't stop. I'm just goign to keep praying.
Don'tr go broke trying to impress other ppeople with your wedding. It is really just about you your FH, GOD and your committment to each other. You are just being nice enough to let them watch. You have gotten a lot done. Start going over the list and start removing items. Do you need a $300 wedding cake? a relative could make one for you or you could get it done at a super Walmart for $75! NO ONE will know you got it there if you add fresh flowers. And I have to admit they taste amazing. Your wedding program can be just one page rather than an entire book filled with poemswhen you could have someone recite them live. Think about how you can save and you will. Just breathe baby.
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ill keep you in my prays and i hope that everything works out for you. just pray
Don't be discouraged. It is only satan trying to discourage you. You can cut corners easily. I don't have a big budget either and God is opening up doors I couldn't have opended alone. I'm sure that others have mentioned these suggestions, but trust me, they're really working....
-Hire an art student from an area high school or college who won't charge much, or will do it for free for portfolio purposes.
-Same for musicians. You can get a great string quartet from a high school.
-Where are you located? Try CRAIGSLIST.org. They have them almost everywhere. Look for services there.
-Have an invitation only reception for family and close friends
-Have you gotten your dress. Supprisingly CHADWICK's.com has wedding dresses and bridemaids dresses.
-The WALMART cake idea is FABULOUS! Try your area grocery store florists for floral arrangements too.
Ummm....When I think of more, I'll post them. Hope it helps!
Only 38 more days!!
I feel your pain but don't be discouraged, it will be ok. After my FH and I closed on our home last Friday, I had a major breakdown because with the mortgage and responsibilities that come along with a new home as well as trying to plan our wedding I felt hopeless. Today, I know that there will be challenges but we are not doing this alone. Trust that God will make a way. There may be some corners that have to be cut but we have to remeber to practice that faith that we say we have in God. He won't put more on us than we can bear. Satan has a way of trying to steal the joy from God's children. Look at your situation, you are happy, healthy, your family is ok and about to honor God by getting married. Don't stress or be discouraged and by all means don't let finances become a major issue in your relationship with your FH. I still want the wedding of my dreams but when it's all over it wouldn't matter if I spent a $500 or $50,000, I will have man that God gave to me and his blessing. Be encouraged. You can make your own bouquets, invitations and programs to cut corners. My friend and soror is my coordinator and she's doing those things for me too. She does good work and if you are interested I can send you her prices, they are very cheap. You can tell her what you want and she can make it happen with a limited budget. And she can mail it all to you. The good thing about your situation is you have plenty of time. Be blessed
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Askalot, it will all work out fine. As you can see from so many of the brides here things have a way of working out. You may have to compromise a little on some of the things that you originally wanted, but as Rosetta suggests don't spend lots of money trying to please other people. This is your day, as long as you and FH are ok with everything, then that is all that matters. I will continue to pray that you will be blessed with everything that you heart desires. Be encouraged my sister!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I find comfort in knowing that your wedding is still a ways away (Sept 07)..you have so much opportunities - like everyone said "pace yourself" take your time, cut back on some things, hook up with Platinum (bargain queen) Rosey was correct on the cake issue (I was having the same problem so what I did was change my cake from $400.00 to $90.00) and it was just as pretty - Rosey said it's all about you and your FH and God - if push comes to shove you can not have a big ceremony...there is still time, take it one day at a time (baby steps) it will be just ok - God is still on the throne and guess what - HE IS FAITHFUL!....
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
You can also check Fairytale Endeavors Bridals they have over 60 gowns under $300! Save your money for your honeymoon! I strongly suggest your fiance gets crackin on that. It is one of the most painful disappointments a bride has after her wedding she has to go back to the same routine. You can honeymoon in your own state. no need to go all over the world if money is an issue. Act like you are tourists ans stay in a local romantic hotel, go to restaurants you have never been in. things like that will leave a lasting memory and you will learn more about your state.
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Thank you ladies for all of your suggestions and support. However, the ballroom I booked has a min. of 175 people (he cut me a break, it's actually 200 people). Please understand all, I am NOT having this wedding to impress my guests or anyone else. I have dreamed of this day since I can remember and I am doing this for MY joy, satisfaction and happiness. I had a loooong conversation with Bossy last night and she really gave me hope and inspiration (and so have you ladies once I've read your posts). I feel so much better guys. I know that God will make a way for me because He hasn't failed me yet!
It's going to be okay, believe me. You still have a lot of time. Your major expenses have been reserved and you said you and FH have a savings plan to cover those expenses. I think you are more worried about the little things that add up. I didn't mean to frighten you when I reminded you of them. Like I told you, try to buy one thing maybe every 1-2 weeks like your garter, ring pillow, unity candle etc. If you try to save and buy all these things at once, it'll seem like a fortune (trust me...I know from experience). Get as much out of the way as possible. Dorry worry, everything will work out just fine and you will have a beautiful wedidng.
Askalot are you having a panic attack?...relax precious, I know you seem overwhelmed thinking about all you have to do but you will be just fine...take baby steps and if seems too much - sit on the edge of the chair lean forward put your head between your knees and breathe...it will work out just fine.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
Breathe. Sit back. Open your mouth and your heart to Him. Watch a miracle grow. He did it for me...and wants you to trust Him so He can do it for you. Peace and blessings darling.
HIS eye is on the sparrow, and I know HE watches.........me
Sept,I'm in the same boat with you.But you have so much more accomplished than I do.Bossy is right about the little things, about buying 1-2 items each week.Rosey gave an excellent website for your wedding dress.Also, try www.stylishbridal.com.They have nice dresses at affordable prices.They also offer 3 day 2 night honeymoon with the purchase of your dress.Charley, thank you for the nickname "Bargain Queen".Lol.
Born Blessed!
[quote="platinumstyle"]Charley, thank you for the nickname "Bargain Queen".Lol.
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Girl my sister calls me the lay-a-way princess cause she is the queen of lay-a-way...it's all good..we gatta do what we gatta do ah? :-)
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
you ladies are a trip. I only wish I could find stamps on the clearance rack. lol
One word -- Delegate. Make a list of everything that needs to be done and ASK someone to do it. This is my first day on this site and it sounds like you have a wonderful on-line support team, but have you reached out to your local team? Think about which items you really want to spend on and which once you can scale back on or ask for help with. People are going to spend $ on wedding presents -- well the cake you want can be a present. If you already have a list revisit it and break it down to a timeline and complete/pay for things one at a time. Best wishes. Z.
Askalot, I must give you your props, you are definitely on top of things. My wedding is in November of this year and I have not accomplished nearly as much as you have. I have all of the "little" things, but the major things (where the big bucks are) are still not done. Now that I have gotten the move behind me, I have to focus and get things done. You will see things will work out. Soon you'll be able to relax because you will have accomplished everything. You have an early start, which is a blessing. Wedding planning is quite time consuming and I know with God's help, me you and all of the other ViBrides will have the wedding of our dreams.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I agree with Zcom, you must delegate, I was trying to do everything, I found myself stress out over every little thing all day and night! My maid of honor and one of my bridesmaid has really stepped up to the plate and taken a lot of stress off of me, contacting the bridal party, the vendors and actually working financial problems out for me as well! I've said this before, but will gladly say it again! God is always in control, he knows when you need him most, so he put people in you circle to comfort you and to help you through. I know there's someone that you can trust to help you. Just take a deep breath and think! And he will guild you through!
not stressed anymore! Thanks to my Vibrides!! :)
[quote="ZCommons"]One word -- Delegate. Make a list of everything that needs to be done and ASK someone to do it. This is my first day on this site and it sounds like you have a wonderful on-line support team, but have you reached out to your local team? Think about which items you really want to spend on and which once you can scale back on or ask for help with. People are going to spend $ on wedding presents -- well the cake you want can be a present. If you already have a list revisit it and break it down to a timeline and complete/pay for things one at a time. Best wishes. Z.
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Hello my dear and welcome to the site...I am Charlotte, Woman of God, Mischievous and sometimes a bit Cynical - enough about me!...
I have a question for you something you said that I really feel a little confused about - and I quote......."People are going to spend $ on wedding presents -- well the cake you want can be a present". Are you saying that I should ask my guest to buy my wedding cake?
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
THank you ladies for your responses. But, how can I ask people to pay for something and it's not their wedding? I would feel funny doing that. I have always been the "I don't need any help, I got this" kind of person. When I gave my parents anniversary party (I'm their only child together), my sister asked if I needed help, and I turned it down - although she did give me $100 the night of the party. I guess that's my daddy side in me (stubborn). What do you do, say, "Can you pay for this for me"? My sister has offered to pay for somethign for me (between $700 & $1000), which I didn't turn down this time. lol
That is wonderful when you have people that you can trust to delegate. I haven't began to delegate as yet, but I must admit I am a little bit of a control freak. But I will be enlisting FHs help real soon though!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
And as well as the cake being a gift, so can anything else you choose, I had my honeymoon suite as a gift from the bridesmaids. I also had the florist as a gift from my maid of honor, and last but not least I had my bra and slip for my wedding as a gift. I was also, advised that honeymoons could be put on a registry for your guest to pay for, if that's something you would like to check into.
not stressed anymore! Thanks to my Vibrides!! :)
I disagree that anything can be a gift - I can see you saying SOME THINGS can be a gift but!...The cake has to be at the reception which means that it must be paid for in advance - if you going to your guest and ask them to pay for your cake (there is a difference if you receive money as shower gift - then you can do whatever with it) you really looking to get roll out, cussed or talked about.
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
NOOO.. not ask as in "can you pay for this for me" way. But in the let go of the control way. Who's helping with the planning? What's the family doing? As in Stressed's case, my family members offered to take care of certain things and i graciously accepted. I realize everyone's situation is different but when planning or when others ask what you need/want -- say what you need/want.
ladies a great way to save money is shop at the bargin store like family dollar, dolooar gentral, dollartree, you will find a lot of items that you can use in there and that will cut the cost of your budget, dont try to inpress your family and friends with a big wedding, just as long as you and your FH are happy with the decorations and locatings then dont worry what other people have to say, just remember its your day and your way. best of luck to all
Well so far, no one has "offered" to do anything but my sister. Maybe next year people will start to offer. lol
Askalot, no one has offered with my wedding either, not that I am expecting them to. My mom is retired and is on a fixed budget and really can't afford to do anything. I realize that people are not obligated to do anything. My family really doesn't have a lot of money. That is fine, because my FH and I decided we would take care of everything and with God's help I believe we will have the wedding of our dreams.
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
[quote="ZCommons"]NOOO.. not ask as in "can you pay for this for me" way. But in the let go of the control way. Who's helping with the planning? What's the family doing? As in Stressed's case, my family members offered to take care of certain things and i graciously accepted. I realize everyone's situation is different but when planning or when others ask what you need/want -- say what you need/want.
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Thank you for clearing this up - you had me there for a minute girl. You are correct thou - if someone wants to help, let them and accept it as a blessing because that is what it is!
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
UPDATE:
My daddy asked me to give him an itemized list of my wedding costs. YEAAAAH! I think he's going to pick a couple of things to pay for.
My son's grandmother offered to buy my cake.
And my sister is giving me between $700 and $1000 to pay for something. I'm going to pick the DJ. God is working things out for me! :-)
God is faithful Askalot!!!! I am so happy for you. That is so encouraging to me as well. Wonderful!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Hey,Askalot!I'm happy for you.Keep us updated on your progress!
Born Blessed!
God takes care of us, I am really happy. When you don't know where the money is coming from, things just have a way of working themselves out. IslandBride can testify to that too!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I'm so happy for you! God really answers prayers! It will all work out.
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SeptBride,\\
Just relax, relate, release everything is in God's hand. My date is June of next year. I order a few things on every pay day. I work a little overtime when I know there is a big purchase coming up. I have a good friend who is helping me with the planning. We've set reminders and deadlines to get things done and based on money we are realistic about it. It really helps to have someone who unerstands what you're trying to do and is willing to help. Girl you really are on top of things.
Thank you ladies for all of your words of encouragment. I know my God is good! Rhony, you are certainly right about what you said. Thanks brownskin! I will certainly keep you ladies updated. I know I won't update you with anything with FMIL though. Keep us in your prayers! And I will keep you in mine!
And the people said Amen!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
Amen!
Platinum. girl this post is for you too!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
I have no comment other than to say I like brownskin's ticker :-)
Charlotte wishes you all a beautiful Christmas filled with loads of love, laughter and the true meaning of this blessed season.
Yes it is nice isn't it!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
[quote="DaughterRhonda"]Platinum. girl this post is for you too!
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Right!Thanks for your words of wisdom and encouragement.
Born Blessed!
[quote="platinumstyle"]Sept,I'm in the same boat with you.But you have so much more accomplished than I do.Bossy is right about the little things, about buying 1-2 items each week.Rosey gave an excellent website for your wedding dress.Also, try www.stylishbridal.com.They have nice dresses at affordable prices.They also offer 3 day 2 night honeymoon with the purchase of your dress.Charley, thank you for the nickname "Bargain Queen".Lol.
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Hey Plat did you order your dress from here? Or did anyone for that matter. I saw a couple of beautiful dresses but I am scared to order online.
Real love requires a minimum of emotion and a maximum of the will - Bishop Keith W. Reed, Sr.
Ivy, they discontinued the dress I wanted and I couldn't find a suitable replacement. I ordered mine from www.bridalonlinestore.com. It's shown in "Platinumstyle's Postponement-Again".
Born Blessed!