For Vibrant Brides of Color

Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

20 posts / 0 new
Last post
michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I am soooooooo embarassed. I am a pretty private person so know one at work knows much about my personal life.Yesterday, someone asked me if I was pregnant. I said no that I am picking up weight from overeating after losing my mom and that I am hitting the gym. My co-worker said that at four months I am not showing but that my butt has gotten really big. So, I decided to tell my boss. Terrible.She asked me if I were in a long term relationship? Is the father around or will I be doing this alone? And was the pregnancy/baby a good thing?My fiance is still saving for my ring so I tried to wait until he had gotten it before I told anyone at work but I figured I should give her a heads up before I started to show. I could just cry at this very moment. It went exactly as I thought it would go and I am so ashamed.I am four months and I never complained or asked anyone to do anything for me. I never cried morning sickness or anything. No one knew by the way i acted. The shame!

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I am soooooooo embarassed. I am a pretty private person so know one at work knows much about my personal life.Yesterday, someone asked me if I was pregnant. I said no that I am picking up weight from overeating after losing my mom and that I am hitting the gym. My co-worker said that at four months I am not showing but that my butt has gotten really big. So, I decided to tell my boss. Terrible.She asked me if I were in a long term relationship? Is the father around or will I be doing this alone? And was the pregnancy/baby a good thing?My fiance is still saving for my ring so I tried to wait until he had gotten it before I told anyone at work but I figured I should give her a heads up before I started to show. I could just cry at this very moment. It went exactly as I thought it would go and I am so ashamed.I am four months and I never complained or asked anyone to do anything for me. I never cried morning sickness or anything. No one knew by the way i acted. The shame!

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

daughterrhonda
daughterrhonda's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 9 months ago
Joined: 05/26/2005 - 17:30
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Michelle, you have no reason to be ashamed!  I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your boss, but I definitely do believe that she overstepped her boundaries!  However, I want to give her the benefit of the doubt and hope that she was asking you out of genuine concern and not being judgemental.  Your child will be bought up in a home full of love.  You should be happy, children are a gift from God, a miracle is taking place in your body!  People will always have opinions -- so with that being said, the only opinion that matters is yours.  Take this time to be happy and enjoy your pregnancy.  All the best my sister, God bless!

Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37

msstbmrs
msstbmrs's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 1 month ago
Joined: 02/02/2009 - 20:08
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I second that, Rhony.  I could not have said that better myself.
 
To my sister, Michelle...May God continue to bless you, your FH, and that beautiful healthy baby you carry inside.

viprincessbride
viprincessbride's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 6 months ago
Joined: 05/12/2008 - 19:20
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Wow! I agree that your boss asked waaaaay too much information, concerned or not. You say you're a private person, so I don't believe that's the type of relationship you have with her. Unbelievable! Some of these people have no sense of decorum or the information limits for their position.  You certainly didn't have to answer all those questions. All you needed to tell her was that you were pregnant, about what date you're due, and start discussing maternity leave and your workload. That's it....all the rest is NONE OF HER BEESWAX! Dag! If you wanted to share the info. that would be up to you.

Like the ladies mentioned, don't let that woman make you feel ashamed about anything. This is your life and your decisions. She needs to pay attention to her own. This isn't 1809. Hello! Just concentrate on staying happy and healthy for your baby

[url=http://daisypath.com][img]http://dwdf.daisypath.com/TikiPic.php/x6JfPkg.jpg[/img][img]http://dwdf.daisypath.com/x6Jfm5.png[/img][/url]

turiya
turiya's picture
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 5 months ago
Joined: 08/29/2007 - 15:22
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Awe Michele ...are you from here? I feel worst for her than I do for you! After everything that you're taking in ...and she had the nerve to say more than Congratulations and when will you be taking off? She tripping!
 
Be happy sweetie ...this is a blessed time in your life!

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10712;106/st/20081228/e/Our+Anniversary/k/5eb4/event.png[/img]
[/url]

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I have never. I work in a pretty big place so I know that it will get around even though I asked her not to tell anyone. I have decided just to wear my lab coat all the time and not to discuss my pregnancy.
I will give her the benefit of te doubt that maybe since I lost my mom in December she was concerned about how I would deal with a baby. The funny thing i one of the last coherent things my mother said to me was "you should have a baby." I think I ovulated that day. Seriously. LOL

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

yes, im from here

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

platinumstyle
platinumstyle's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 8 months ago
Joined: 09/28/2005 - 12:32
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

((hug)) I feel that your boss overstepped her bounds. If anything she could have just said "Congratulations. How are you feeling,etc" and kept it moving.
Stay strong. We're here for you.

Born Blessed!

ginoue
ginoue's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 4 weeks ago
Joined: 06/04/2007 - 06:23
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Wow, Michele, I'm sorry that she overstepped her bounds, but you should not let that interfere with enjoying your bundle from above.  Stay blessed always.

ieasha
ieasha's picture
Offline
Last seen: 11 years 10 months ago
Joined: 06/12/2006 - 10:53
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

So sorry to hear that. If I was your boss I would be embrassed for even asking those types of questions. But hey you know everyone's personality is different, maybe she just don't know any better. I dont know I am trying to figure out what gave her the thought that those were questions to ask. Oh well CONGRATS from ME!

Each One Teach One!

butterbean
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 5 months ago
Joined: 12/19/2007 - 16:11
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

That is absolutely none of her business. I hope that you had asked her why she inquired about your relationship?

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I was so shocked. I am not going to tell any of them my business. I already denied it once. I could care less. i am going to just continue to not discuss it with any of them. I could not believe it!

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

dreamgurl
dreamgurl's picture
Offline
Last seen: 14 years 7 months ago
Joined: 09/18/2007 - 21:50
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

honey you are right!! it verges on invasion of privacy and harassment. It is noones business and you are entitled to that- Your boss should know better its unprofessional and illegal to pry as much as she did- OR she has no social skills and IS just concerned about you- (some people just cant communicate sensitively)

bumblebeekee
bumblebeekee's picture
Offline
Last seen: 15 years 3 months ago
Joined: 06/06/2006 - 22:16
Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I am sorry you had to experience that. However she does not deserve the benefit of the doubt. It is what it is and now you see her true colors.
You need to enjoy your pregnancy even at work. If your baby kicks, and she sees you grab your tummy, hold your head up with pride and smile. She may have personal issues, misscarriage, abortion, no man, man problems, etc. And thats not your fault. When she does ask you how things are going, tell her exactly how you feel. If its a bad day and baby is kicking around and rolling around like crazy, say so, but still hold up your part at work. If you need a day off, call in sick, and come bak to work and work hard like its no other day. You can keep it business as usual, but there is no way you need to hide it. Wear clothing that accentuates your pregnancy that is appropriate for work.
 
I am just sick of bosses like that, so she needs to get a life! This is your baby, your blessing, and the devil comes in all kinds of weird little forms to make you feel like God burdened you instead of blessed you----but the devil is a lie!
 
Telling your Boss you are pregnant was a great idea. A GREAT idea. And very professional of you! I work with people who hide it and hide it, until we are looking at them like, okay did you swallow a basketball, gaining weight or what? I don't like when people look offended when someone asks them if they are pregnant, then say NO, when they really are! You did the right thing.

We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)

a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

I am so upset. I have two part time jobs and I am afraid to tell them now. I am four months now so I may try to push it to five with the other two jobs.
I did the best that I could. I am never late, never complain, never whine. I just dont know why she even asked me those questions.
I am not going to ever tell anyone else here. I am just going to do my job and that is it. My co-worker has agreed to be god grandmother since my mom is gone and all the older ladies that I shared the news with are estatic. I told them as soon as I saw the second line.
At church the pastor noticed and all the ladies wanted to pray over my tummy. I was embarrased. LOL

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

cmt
cmt's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 10 months ago
Joined: 04/28/2008 - 18:20
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Michele, you have NOTHING to be embarrassed about. You have a human life growing inside of you. At this point it doesn't matter if you got pregnant before marriage. TRUST ME!!!! It was already in God's plan for this child to be conceived by ONLY you and FH. Sure our choices and decisions interfere or prolong His plan for us sometimes, but this has already been [u][b]predestined[/b][/u]. DONT BE ASHAMED!!!!   Trust me....you are not the first woman who's had a baby out of wedlock and you definetly wont be the last.
Don't let MAN determine your happiness.
BE BLESSED!!!

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10728;2/st/20090906/e/Our+1st+Anniversary/k/f5b3/event.png[/img]
[/url]

butterbean
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 5 months ago
Joined: 12/19/2007 - 16:11
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

First of all, pull yourself together and celebrate!
Second, tell your bosses just so you wont put your pregnancy in danger if they ever ask you to do anything strenuous.
Third, if you are really in fear of losing your job, you need to understand that you have rights and that you can file grievances for pregnancy discrimination to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission:
Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC)
1801 L Street, N.W.
Washington, DC 20507
1-800-669-EEOC   TDD: 1-800-800-3302
The Women's Bureau
U.S. Department of Labor
Washington, DC 20210
1-800-827-5335   TDD:  1-800-326-2577
Seriously, you don't have to put up with your boss's BS at a time like this.

michelerdh2005
michelerdh2005's picture
Offline
Last seen: 13 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/02/2008 - 14:13
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Thank you. I am not worried. LOL. I was just trying to be considerate. I did my part. After that I went to tak to my co-workers while they raved and raved about the FABULOUS shower they are planning for me.
They spend the entire day feeding me fruit and giving advice. It is sooooo sweet. They love my FH also. So we  have the support that matters.

[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/1;18;13/st/20090824/k/9ec5/preg.png[/img]
[/url]

daughterrhonda
daughterrhonda's picture
Offline
Last seen: 12 years 9 months ago
Joined: 05/26/2005 - 17:30
Re:Telling my boss that I am pregnant was terrible!

Wonderful Michele, now enjoy your pregnancy!  God bless!

Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37