VENT - SOMEBODY'S GOING TO GET HURT!

Ok Askalot - relax, relate, release! But I have to admit, those shoes are not even cute!

I'm sorry she's testing your G....But everyone is going to be looking at you. On top of that, she'll be feeling real stupid when everyone else looks sophisticated and elegant and she looks like project run away! lol Her shoes do remind me of what some of the old ladies at my church would wear.

Have others found thier shoes yet? I would tell her "this is not quite what I had in mind for my wedding. I would like something more strappy and less metallic. Why don't you look at the shoes _________ found at ______store. That's more the shoe I had in mind."

Did you give them any pics to go by as an example?

Are the pics of your bridesmaid dresses posted?

Then have her stick them ugly a** shoes from under her dress with the rest of them, in their cute ones, haha. She will be so embarassed she wished that she would've gotten with the program. No for real, it's your wedding, don't let her tell you what she ain't gone do, that makes my stomach tighten, when they tell you what they will and won't do!!! If she felt like she couldn't handle the $$, then she shouldn't have agreed to be in the wedding, weddings ain't cheap!!! I asked all my girls to get professional manicures and pedicures in french. My husband's niece said to me Saturday that she was doing her own nails and feet since she "was" in beauty school. I told her to do her own feet and nails and see what happens! And the child had the nerve to say to me "we'll see"! Her little smart mouth is going to sell a check that her butt can't cash!!! And I mean that! I am happy about my day, but at the same time I can't wait to get it over with .........

Sept, have you figured out what you are doing for attendant gifts? If you are able, maybe you could get her shoes as your gift. The closer it got to our wedding, we started hearing money complaints also. Before it was all over, we ended up paying for 1 bridesmaid dress with shoes and two tuxedos because people didn't have the money at last minute.

LOL, yeah I knew I was reaching with that one. I couldn't believe we actually did it but the tux's were actually the day before wedding and I was desparate.

So girl, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do???

[quote="SeptBride"]Y'all, I am a person that do not have a lot of patience to start. Now that my time is getting very near, why are people testing my gangsta??????????????? I told my girls since the last post that I posted here about shoes, to get gold, strappy sandals. Why did someone go out and buy these cheap, $8.00 shoes?????? Now, there's nothing wrong with getting a steal and there's nothing wrong with payless, if that floats your boat, but do these shoes look ANYTHING LIKE A GOLD, STRAPPY SANDAL??? Then her note to me was this: This is the shoe i got. it's on sale for $8.00. I hope u like because if u don't i am not searching for nothing else. Ummmm, excuse me???? Well, I guess your azz will not be in the wedding!

[/quote]

GIRL....where's my Vaseline? You're lucky I still got my braces on b/c I'm not above putting the matching razor in my mouth. (ok, sorry...had a ghetto flashback from the 80's). But, now that you're laughing. Let her know casually that those shoes look like something outta "The Playa's Club" & give her a dang pole while you're at it.
Weddings cost money & she should've came to you in regards to that. Not just "assumed" that some plastic lookin' stripper shoes from a cheesy strip club would cut it. Is there anyway you can help her out? Heck, if she wears a 6.5, I've got a strappy gold sandal she can HAVE!!

[quote="HeCallsMeAbeni"]I'm sorry she's testing your G....But everyone is going to be looking at you. On top of that, she'll be feeling real stupid when everyone else looks sophisticated and elegant and she looks like project run away! lol Her shoes do remind me of what some of the old ladies at my church would wear.
[/quote]

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL...Gurl you are crazy ( but sadly you are right too)

Relax Askalot, no one will see her shoes. And just like the other ladies said, she's the one who's gonna feel bad when they show off their sexy cute shoes.

Sorry for the late reply, my 2cents:
let her wear the shoes. Yes they are not all that, but she'll be the one cursing the day she went for a bargin when her toes are all blistered up and burning up due to the fake @ss vinal (that we know they are) shoes on her feet!
Plus you have long dresses so thank goodness they won't be that visible.
You're too sweet, I wouldn't have bought her nothing. Sorry.

I'm glad you found a shoe....Tell Bossie we said whats up! -Bossie to the rescue!

Tell her to get her 8.00 back....Thats why I went to the store with my BM's to make sure they didn't bring back something weak or ugly....I can't beleive she had the nerve to say, "if you don't like them she ain't searching for something else!" "I'm glad you kept it cool, cause they would have been totin' me out of the church with my hands behind my back for assult: "Headline: Bride attacks bridesmaid with ugly gold sandal!"

[quote="Bumblebeekee"]I can't beleive she had the nerve to say, "if you don't like them she ain't searching for something else!" "I'm glad you kept it cool, cause they would have been totin' me out of the church with my hands behind my back for assult: "Headline: Bride attacks bridesmaid with ugly gold sandal!"[/quote]

2 funny Bumble!

Thats right Askalot, make sure you get your $$ back!

Bump!

Askalot, what happened with the shoe issue? Did she find another shoe? I know I sound like an odd ball, but I like that shoe. Yes, really. But I don't think that it was appropiate for your wedding. It's more like a shoe you'd wear to the club.

Yeah if you knew how to rock it!!! I can't picture me in that shoe at the club, but that's just me!!! When I see that shoe, I think about Nana at church and then me playing dress up in them. But I am curious as to what happened Sept. Let us know!

SeptBride, did she check Bakers or another dyeable shoe manufactor? Im in NYC for a conference looking for shoes for my cousins wedding, i can look for a gold shoe and tell you where they are available for her. Do u want a metallic gold or mat.

Oh Lord. I was searching for topics that involved shoes and ran into this topic. I know that this is an old post, but I couldn't help but to comment on this.

I was a bridesmaid for my friend's wedding a few months back. I was told to buy gold strappy sandals. I have flat feet and can not walk in those cutsy shoes. I've looked and discovered that there is no such thing as wide width gold strappy sandals. I defy anyone to find any on the web. I was blessed to have an understanding friend who believed that my presence is more important than finding "the" pair of shoes.
And one more thing...if your girl had to pay for the dress, which tends to cost a grip on it's own, why press her to spend more money? If those shoes make her feel comfortable and is a reasonable price it shouldn't be such a big deal, especially since her dress is going to cover them up whenever she takes pictures. I hope that SeptBride apologized to her girl.

I have been in a few weddings myself and it has always been my understanding that when you agree to be in a wedding you tend to go with what the bride wants. I have been in weddings that the dress was 300 and still had to purchase shoes, other necessities and give money not only for a bridal shower but a bachelorette party as well. I think that every bride envisions her perfect day and how everyone and everything will look.

[quote="housewife147"]I have been in a few weddings myself and it has always been my understanding that when you agree to be in a wedding you tend to go with what the bride wants. I have been in weddings that the dress was 300 and still had to purchase shoes, other necessities and give money not only for a bridal shower but a bachelorette party as well. I think that every bride envisions her perfect day and how everyone and everything will look.
[/quote]

I hear you! Its a sticky sitautation....on the one hand, if you agree to be part of it, you should work hard to get the attire the bride is asking, and not be rude about it like Askalot's BM was....I mean how is someone going to TELL ME, that they will wear this and that shoe cause its on sale and if I don't like it they are not searching for another shoe!?!?!? That attitude is rude...on the other hand, I couldn't ask my friends to almost go broke....I mean, my friends just don;t have it like that, so I couldn't fix my mouth to ask them to buy a 300.00 dress, and 200.00 shoes, pay for their own hair, I get them some "okay" jewelry and ask them to fork over an additional 1, 2, 3 hundred dollars for a bachelor's and bachelorette's party...I mean, these are my friends, and I know their situation, and to me, I should be happy that they agree to stand in with me at my wedding, not the other way around....Cause I need the BM's, they don't need me ....and I am sorry, its not all that to be chasing some guests, and being someone's slave for a day...I just don't rate that too highly on my list of accomplishments in life....that long drawn out thing being said, if you agree to be a BM...understand the situation (especially your $$ situation) before you agree, cause weddings are serious business.....either you pay (with your time/money) or you don't play, and people need to understand that....But as a bride, there is no need for me to be breaking my friends either, cause its just one day....you don't want to lose them cause you broke their bank accounts (especially if you don't tell them its 1000.00 to be part of it ahead of time) after you come back from the honeymoon....

PS...I think that as the Bride and Groom, we should be trying to cover their costs as much as possible because they are doing US a favor by helping out and being at our beck and call....It was only because our Bridal Party insisted on paying for their attire that they did, because we were prepared to do it for them....but it did free us up to spend more $$ on their cufflinks, jewelry and gifts....

....I mean how is someone going to TELL ME, that they will wear this and that shoe cause its on sale and if I don't like it they are not searching for another shoe!?!?!?

It was a tactless way that SeptBride's BM told her about her situation, but I was put off by how she responded back to her by insisting on spending more money.
I don't know, my wedding is a year and a few months away. I might become a frustrated bridezilla once my time comes around, however, I remember not to ask for much from my bridesmaids other than to show up on time in good spirits. Im thinking about allocating some of my budget towards a portion of the cost of girls's dresses.