Ladies!
you know I LOVE hearing all of your opinions on different issues-so let me pose this one to you that I was told about last night...
Last weekend an aquaintance got married-during marriage counseling the Pastor informed her that he didn't think they were ready to get married because there were alot of unresolved issues they needed to deal with such as 1. he told her he was not ready to get married and wanted to postpone until Aug and 2. he recently cheated on her. well, needless to say she still wanted to go thru with it so on their Wedding day, wedding was due to start at 4 and she didn't arrive to the church until 4:30 (ok-you know we brides are sometimes late-so we can roll with that) 5:15-groom is not there, Pastor calls him and he is still at home (???) Pastor tells him he is leaving and will not perform the ceremony, groom arrives at 6 (2 hrs late) they are married by an associate minister. Wedding is beautiful...once everything got started...fast forward to reception...they are cutting the cake and photographer wants them to pose with their rings-he had took his off and put it in his pocket-his response: he had washed his hands in the bathroom!!!!!!!!!! my questions are:
1. As the bride would YOU have went ahead with the wedding?
2. Do you think the Pastor should have been more stern of not marrying them once he realized they were not ready instead of deciding to go ahead and do it?
3. Was the Pastor wrong for leaving when the groom was still at home?
4. Should the Associate Pastor have married them after all of the issues of the day?
5. What about the ring situation?
Ladies, can't wait to hear your responses!! :)
Ladies!
you know I LOVE hearing all of your opinions on different issues-so let me pose this one to you that I was told about last night...
Last weekend an aquaintance got married-during marriage counseling the Pastor informed her that he didn't think they were ready to get married because there were alot of unresolved issues they needed to deal with such as 1. he told her he was not ready to get married and wanted to postpone until Aug and 2. he recently cheated on her. well, needless to say she still wanted to go thru with it so on their Wedding day, wedding was due to start at 4 and she didn't arrive to the church until 4:30 (ok-you know we brides are sometimes late-so we can roll with that) 5:15-groom is not there, Pastor calls him and he is still at home (???) Pastor tells him he is leaving and will not perform the ceremony, groom arrives at 6 (2 hrs late) they are married by an associate minister. Wedding is beautiful...once everything got started...fast forward to reception...they are cutting the cake and photographer wants them to pose with their rings-he had took his off and put it in his pocket-his response: he had washed his hands in the bathroom!!!!!!!!!! my questions are:
1. As the bride would YOU have went ahead with the wedding?
2. Do you think the Pastor should have been more stern of not marrying them once he realized they were not ready instead of deciding to go ahead and do it?
3. Was the Pastor wrong for leaving when the groom was still at home?
4. Should the Associate Pastor have married them after all of the issues of the day?
5. What about the ring situation?
Ladies, can't wait to hear your responses!! :)
WOOOOOOOOOW. One word...ANNULMENT and **KHATTC**!!!!!!!!!!!
[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10755;116/st/20080725/e/Our+Wedding/k/110e/event.png[/img]
[/url]
1. NO
2. He warned them, but can't really tell them what to do
3. NO ...he proly figured it was his way out
4. I think I thought my ring was actually attached to my finger before I realized that I can actually take it off to put lotion on. He took his ring off already?????????? Wow .. and to be honest, when the hell he had time to go to the bathroom, I don't remember using the bathroom until I came out of my gown for the night ..but I guess it's different with dudes ...they only have a zipper huh?
[url=http://www.TickerFactory.com/]
[img]http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/4;10712;106/st/20081228/e/Our+Anniversary/k/5eb4/event.png[/img]
[/url]
Okay here are my answers:
#1. H-No!!!
#2. Yes he should have been more stern with them and just stuck to his guns and not wasted his or their time.
#3. I think he should've waited until the groom arrived and tried to once again express his concerns about them not going through with it.
#4. I think the associate pastor was put in an awkward position and felt that it may have been his obligation to go ahead and marry them. But in my opinion, he should've told them no as well.
#5. OK, I don't think he wanted to get married and that sorry a** excuse was just that...he should've flushed that excuse down the toilet with the tissue!!!! I mean, come on now....
well ladies,
here is my opinion:
1. I can say I would not went ahead with it, but to save face, she probably did and also when a woman wants to have a wedding, she will have one, by any means necessary!
2. I believe that the Pastor should have not agreed to marry them knowing they were not truly ready-you cannot join together what God has not ordained and obviously with all of the issues this was not a marriage ordained by God.
3. Kudos to Pastor for leaving! not only did this "boy-child" disrespect his FW, he also disrespected the pastor, the church and her family by his lack actions
4. As for the associate minister, again, how can you ordain something that you know is not in God's will???
5. Sorriest excuse I have EVER heard! how many men (or women) take their rings off to wash ther d**n hands?!?!?!
and btw-pray for me ladies, because as I stated I am aquainted with these individuals so I am going to have to try really hard not to let my FLESH rise up and start placing judgement when I am in their presense!!!
1. No we would no have done the wedding...So she was desperate and needed to save face.
2. The Pastor should have said...I am not marrying you, and left it at that...At my old church people have wedding fever, and truthfully, the fact that my Pastor married us is saying a lot and thats because many people have left that church because he said no...Not because they are not in love, not because someone got pregnant and needed a quickie wedding, but because he KNOWS.....And my Pastor doesn't play...He will tell you in a second that he is not feeling it...You are even lucky if he says WAIT....Even people who have been members longer than me were turned down at the time because he knew better....But I think that HER Pastor was being nice....
3. That being said...he did the right thing by making a statement and leaving, but it was too little too late....The wedding day is way past the time to stand your ground...It makes the situation worse...
4. The Associate Pastor was wrong for trying to be nice....
5. I will give him a pass on the ring....Some people take their rings off (like me and my DH when we shower or clean), but at work and day to day handwashing we leave it on. We don't wear rings at home either so sometimes we may leave the house and forget it...But we are till meticulous about them so we go to the jeweler faithfully to get them cleaned and inspected on schedule.....so that may be a personal thing....Others don't take it off at all.....
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
Once brother man cheated on me, we definitely would've postponed the wedding. Even if your friend decided to stay in a relationship with him, they should've worked out their problems first. I believe in reading the signs and that is a great big one!
I'm with the pastor, I would've left too.
Unfortunately your friend is in love with the idea of being married and not with the work that is entailed in having a successful marriage. I believe this couple is heading for some hard times.
Taking his ring off and putting it in his pocket at the reception -- is a definite no no!!! This is the first of many times that he will be taking his ring off.
Life has a way of teaching us the lessons we must learn, these two are headed for the school of hard knocks!!!!
Delight yourself in The Lord & He will give you the desires of your heart!Ps 37
[quote="DaughterRhonda"]Once brother man cheated on me, we definitely would've postponed the wedding. Even if your friend decided to stay in a relationship with him, they should've worked out their problems first. I believe in reading the signs and that is a great big one!
I'm with the pastor, I would've left too.
Unfortunately your friend is in love with the idea of being married and not with the work that is entailed in having a successful marriage. I believe this couple is heading for some hard times.
Taking his ring off and putting it in his pocket at the reception -- is a definite no no!!! This is the first of many times that he will be taking his ring off.
Life has a way of teaching us the lessons we must learn, these two are headed for the school of hard knocks!!!!
[/quote]
Girl, somebody should have knock knocked on her head....Sounds like desperation....But I guess its easy for me to talk from the outside looking in........................Naw, I would've been through!
We've been Happily Married 2 Years and Counting:)
a href="http://www.TickerFactory.com/">
1. no I wouldnt have married him she surely should have resolved their cheating issue
2. Yes he should have
3. no pastor shouldnt have shown up meaning regardless to his warning had bro man be on time he would have married them anyways
4. ass pastor should have taken a page from bro mans book and dipped out too
5.girl bye I would have had the marriage anulled asap
Ditto to what everyone else has said. She'll be the same chick crying "why me" later.
"I'm a work in progress, God is not through me yet"
These are my answers:
1. Hell NO!!!
2. The pastor should've definitely put his foot down and told them that he knows that they're not ready to be married and furthermore, neither he nor his associate pastors would perform the ceremony.
3. No, the Pastor was not wrong in Leaving. Hell, I would not have shown up at all.
4. The Associate Pastor should not have married them and should've left with the Pastor.
5. As for the ring situation, you would've heard me slapping FH from a mile away if he dared to remove his ring other than me removing it to be professionally cleaned. You don't have to remove your weddng ring to wash your hands!!! COME ON!!!